Homer: Okay, once more. Where are we going? Edna: To Capitol City. Homer: And why are you and the old lady in the car? Agnes: We're gonna talk Armin Tamzarian into coming back. Homer: And why is Marge here? Marge: I came up with the idea. Homer: And why am I here? Marge: Because the streets of Capitol City are no place for three unescorted ladies. Homer: Why are the kids here? Marge: Because we couldn't find Grandpa to sit for them. Homer: Why is Grandpa here? Abe: Because Jasper didn't want to come by himself. Homer: Eh, fair enough.
favorite scene from simpsons would have to either be when bart takes all the megaphones and blows apart springfield or when homer has to think long and hard to try to connect dental plan and lisa needs braces.
Abe Simpson: "I used to be with it. But then they changed what it was. Now what I'm with isn't it, and what's it seems scary and weird...and, it'll happen to you." Milhouse: "It was just like Romeo and Juliet, only it ended in tragedy." Marge: "I wish they never had invented fried cheese." Homer: "Just once I'd like someone to call me 'Sir' without adding 'You're making a scene.'" Abe Simpson: "You president? This is the greatest country in the world. We've got a whole system set up to keep people like you from ever becoming president!"
"Sure, I might offend a few of the bluenoses with my cocky stride and musky odors -- oh, I'll never be the darling of the so-called 'City Fathers' who cluck their tongues, stroke their beards, and talk about 'What's to be done with this Homer Simpson?'"
Homer: Marge? Since I'm not talking to Lisa,would you please ask her to pass me the syrup?... Marge: Lisa,please pass your father the syrup... Lisa: Bart,tell Dad I will only pass the syrup if it won't be used on any meat product... Bart: You dunkin your sausages in that syrup homeboy?... Homer: Marge,tell Bart I just wan ... t to drink a nice glass of syrup like I do every morning... Marge: Tell him yourself you're ignoring lisa,not Bart... Homer: Bart,thank your mother for pointing that out... Marge: Homer,you're not not talking to me and secondly i heard what you said!... Homer: Lisa,tell your mother to get off my case... Bart: Err dad,lisa's the one you're not talking to... Homer: Bart, go to your room.
Lionel Hutz: (corrects his business card, adding punctuation) Works on contingency basis? No, money down!
Chief Wiggum: I hope this has taught you kids a lesson: Kids never learn.
Homer: It takes two to lie. One to lie and one to listen.
Homer: No TV and no beer makes Homer something something. Marge: Go crazy? Homer: Don't mind if I do! (goes crazy)
Dr. Nick: Inflammable means flammable? What a country.
Smithers: People see you as somewhat of an ogre. Mr. Burns: I ought to club them and eat their bones!
Jebediah Springfield: A noble spirit embiggens the smallest man.
Bart: My bones are so brittle! But I always drink plenty of...Malk?
Skinner: I've got a gut feeling Uder is around here somewhere. After all, isn't there a little Uder in all of us? In fact, you might even say that we just ATE Uder, and he's in our stomachs RIGHT NOW.
Mr. Burns: Smithers, fetch the Bi-Oculars
Homer: There are three ways to do things: The right way, the wrong way, and the Max Power way.
Moe: They think they're so high and mighty, just because they've never been caught driving without pants.
Homer: I see these kids now with "Jive" printed on their shirts, pfff. Now I can teach you how to say "Jive" Lisa: Dad, please just drive the car, Dad. Homer: I'm watchin the road, sweetie. You jiiiiiiive turkey. See, you've got to sass it. Quit jiiiiiiiiiiiivin' me, turkey! You've got to sass it! A turkey is a bad person.
Nelson: The thing about huckleberries is, once you've had fresh, you'll never go back to canned.
Mr. Burns: 206 bones, fifty miles of small intestine, full, pouting lips; Why, this fellow is less a snowman...than a God.
Abraham Lincoln: "IIIIIIIIIIt's showtime!" (Figment of Homer' imagination, wielding a chain)
Homer: "Best kiss of your life....so far" (I really liked this one from the movie)
Meathook: (to Homer) You and me, in the circle of death! Marge: Oh, I just swept the circle of death!
Marge: Haven't any of you ever had a dream? Ramrod: Yeah, I had a dream! I was in this beautiful garden, pounding the crap out of a shopkeeper. Then… Marge: No, no, I mean the dream of a good job, a loving family, and a home in the suburbs. Meathook: Aw, man, to get all that you'd have to kill, like, fifty people.
Homer: I invested in something called NewsCorp. Lisa: Dad! That's FOX! Homer: Undo! Undo!
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