Stupid lyrics that drive you crazy

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L33T_HAXOR

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I was driving to work this morning with the radio on and I heard this song that goes "I only want to die alive!" I've probably heard this song twenty times and never noticed it, but this time when I heard it my mind kind of snapped.

You only want to die alive??? What? WHAT??? THAT MAKES NO FUCKING SENSE

Also, that one Pitbull song where he rhymes Kodak with Kodak used to drive me up the wall. You're being paid approximately 15 bajillion dollars to write these songs and you can't come up with a different word to rhyme with Kodak? Really dude?

Have you ever had this kind of reaction to song lyrics?

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planetfunksquad

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#2  Edited By planetfunksquad

Any lyrics that mention dancing on tables, raising your glass, or pointing out that "we are young" really fuck me off.

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Kaineda77

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Once I realized that Kid Rock was ryhming "things" with "things" in "all summer long", I couldn't unhear it anymore. Really spoils one of the most original songs by one of the greatest artist of this century.

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splodge

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#4  Edited By splodge

When you listen to the lyrics of a lot of songs you realise how inane and shitty they are.

EG, every modern love song:

Girl, you know that I want

To be with you now

And want you to know

That i can never be

The only one

To be by your side

Because thats what I want

Girlll no no yeah no.

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Svenzon

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"One way ticket to hell aaand back!"

Maybe The Darkness had some deeper meaning behind it, but that's not how a one-way ticket works, ya dummies!

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BBAlpert

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Rhyming homonyms rubs me the wrong way sometimes, but I'll get over it.

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Rejizzle

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That "call me maybe" song. I just don't understand why she thinks giving her number to a guy in a bar is crazy. It seems like its a perfectly reasonable thing to do. But then again, maybe this whole not understanding pickup bars thing is why all the other boys try to change her.

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paulmako

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#8  Edited By paulmako

@rejizzle said:

That "call me maybe" song. I just don't understand why she thinks giving her number to a guy in a bar is crazy. It seems like its a perfectly reasonable thing to do. But then again, maybe this whole not understanding pickup bars thing is why all the other boys try to change her.

That lyrics to that song were kind of weird! Firstly the idea of giving someone your phone number for them to actually call you was weirdly old fashioned for 2012. It's not like 'text me' or 'Facebook chat me!' or something that people were actually doing.

The main line people got caught up on was 'Before you came into my life I missed you so bad'. Like, what?

That said, one of my favourite songs of that year. A summer smash for sure.

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Zevvion

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Slight twist on this, I really like the lyrics in that Lonely Island song, Jack Sparrow. I just think it's funny.

@paulmako said:

@rejizzle said:

That "call me maybe" song. I just don't understand why she thinks giving her number to a guy in a bar is crazy. It seems like its a perfectly reasonable thing to do. But then again, maybe this whole not understanding pickup bars thing is why all the other boys try to change her.

That lyrics to that song were kind of weird! Firstly the idea of giving someone your phone number for them to actually call you was weirdly old fashioned for 2012. It's not like 'text me' or 'Facebook chat me!' or something that people were actually doing.

The main line people got caught up on was 'Before you came into my life I missed you so bad'. Like, what?

That said, one of my favourite songs of that year. A summer smash for sure.

It's not that weird. You feel lonely and like no one fits with who you are. Then you finally meet the person who does. So yeah, missing someone before you knew they existed sort off.

Also, giving your number to a guy is crazy if you are a girl, because girls want guys to take initiative on that stuff. Especially in bars. It's one of those things where it isn't a big deal, but their weird fantasies make it a big deal.

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chu52

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#10  Edited By chu52

It really bothers me that Rapman is using 'the real slim shady' to start out 'Bitch Get Hunked'.

He also rhymes 'come out and play'

With 'if you want that shoe candy'

That and blatantly telling kids to use hunkadunk.

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deactivated-5d7530f19fbe4

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@chu52: Hey,man, Rapman is just going his job as a journalist. Don't you know that his eyes are his cameras and his mouth is his microphone?

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erhard

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I haven't actually listened to the song but recently I overheard someone repeating that "My anaconda don't want none" line and immediately hated it.

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Sterling

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I'm in love with the coco.

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Thrillhouse87

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#14  Edited By Thrillhouse87

not sure why, but it really irks me when Scooby Doo become part of the lyrics.

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(otherwise this song is fantastic)

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TheHBK

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The Motto by Drake. I think it is the prime example of what a shitty no talent hack he is. The whole song was written as if he went to a community college class on writing ghetto rap, sat there for one day, went out wrote the song and that was it. Make sure you say the N word. Throw some F words in there too. What is it about? Who cares. "Real N**** Was Up." Fuck you Drake.

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Sambambo

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@svenzon said:

"One way ticket to hell aaand back!"

Maybe The Darkness had some deeper meaning behind it, but that's not how a one-way ticket works, ya dummies!

He was singing about snorting too much coke

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diz

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FirePrince

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@sterling said:

I'm in love with the coco.

Oh my fucking god.

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Nasar7

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Just about every shitty song in every genre that's on the radio nowadays.

Any lyrics that mention dancing on tables, raising your glass, or pointing out that "we are young" really fuck me off.

A thousand times, yes.

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Driadon

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"I keep it 300, like the Romans"
MOTHERFUCKER! Kanye, you actually have one of the most unique and experimental albums in popular hip-hop (Okay, lets be honest: Death Grips, Clipping, and Tyler the Creator aren't 'popular' like Kanye is) and you fucking ruin it with a dumb ass line like that.

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sravankb

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Once I realized that Kid Rock was ryhming "things" with "things" in "all summer long", I couldn't unhear it anymore. Really spoils one of the most original songs by one of the greatest artist of this century.

Most authentic artist of this century, you mean.

OT: That "All about that bass" song. It's not meaningless, but just annoying. Stop trying to convince me that being fat is okay. It just isn't. I'd know; I'm overweight. Trying to lose that excess weight is hard, yes - but simply trying to delude yourself into accepting it and telling everyone else that it's okay is just bullshit. It's a medical condition, and needs to be remedied, not encouraged.

It's especially annoying cause that song is so goddamn catchy. I need to force myself to listen to other songs to get it out of my head.

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Daiphyer

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"I ain't a chinaman - cause I ain't from china, man."

Beat this. I dare you.

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frymillstrum

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#23  Edited By frymillstrum

"They paved paradise and put up a parking lot" has always annoyed me. Me and my brother used to think she was saying "put up with a fucking lot" but knew it couldn't be right since it was on the radio.

A huge amount of stuff Anthony Kiedis writes for the Chili's is just random words cobbled together, I don't mind though because they're on of my favorite bands, and the first album I ever bought was Blood Sugar Sex Magik, I still have it, the only cd I still own. Here's a particularly egregious example from Death of a Martian "Your ilk is funny to the turnstyle touch bunny who's bouquet set a course for bloom without decay"

Rebecca Black - Friday obviously

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LaszloKovacs

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Just about anything 2 Chainz does: "She got a big booty so I call her Big Booty"

@driadon: I hardly think that's the worst thing he does, even just on that album. I love Kanye, but you kind of can't have a Kanye album without some truly cringe-inducing shit.

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billymaysrip

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#25  Edited By billymaysrip

Yo Kanye is Kanye, and Kanye does what Kanye does, but the lyrics from the hook of Black Skinhead really annoy me.

"I keep it 300, like the Romans

300 bitches, where the Trojans?"

It's cool lyrics, and the there's a nice double entendre, but it's just a mish-mash of ancient history. You don't need to major in history to know that the 300 Spartans at Thermopylae, Romans, and Trojans are all unrelated. I also don't understand the phrase "I keep it 300," what does keeping it 300 entail?

@daiphyer said:

"I ain't a chinaman - cause I ain't from china, man."

Beat this. I dare you.

The Fast and Furious Tokyo Drift is an amazing movie. Roger Ebert gave it a 3 out of 4 stars.

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TangyGeoduck

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Why would you want your music as all bass and no treble anyway? Way to ruin it! Unless the lyrics are referring to clefs, in which case it's totally ok in my book.

Also, pretty much anything that comes from LCD radio ready musicians. I know that their music is meant for mass consumption, but come on, there are how many people co-writing these songs and nobody can bother with some half decent lyrics?

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ConstantRyan

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#27  Edited By ConstantRyan

Most of the hacky Tolkein ripoff stuff from Led Zeppelin, any number of songs by popular artists saying it's not about the money (for example It's Not About The Money by Jessie J). To keep it positive I'll say The Colouring Of Pigeons by The Knife has one of my favourite lines in a song with "Six weeks old, Henrietta smiles for the first time". I always find that very affecting for whatever reason.

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cabrit_sans_cor

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Katy Perry's California Girls song. Especially that "melt your popsicle" line. Ughh.

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stryker1121

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#29  Edited By stryker1121

That Carrie Underwood song where she talks about her ex 'stealing her happy.' That drives me batty, for some reason.

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Marcsman

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Anna Kendricks- Cups. The whole fucking song. It's fills me rage.

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Shortbreadtom

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#31  Edited By Shortbreadtom

"Concrete jungle where dreams are made of"

I hate it because it's the kind of lyric that's only dumb when you stop and think. It sounds fine in passing, but giving it a second of thought and you're just left going "Huh? Where dreams are made of?"

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viking_funeral

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I don't know if it made it Stateside, but Icona Pop has a song called I Love It that has the worst verse / chorus switch.

verse

I crashed my car into the bridge...

chorus

I don't care!

It's in so many commercials, and understanding the lyrics, I can't help but think how stupid it is to crash your car and be so proud of it.

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s10129107

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"I don't believe in violence, I don't even believe in disease."

- Black Sabbath

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Jeldh

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#34  Edited By Jeldh

@viking_funeral said:

I don't know if it made it Stateside, but Icona Pop has a song called I Love It that has the worst verse / chorus switch.

verse

I crashed my car into the bridge...

chorus

I don't care!

It's in so many commercials, and understanding the lyrics, I can't help but think how stupid it is to crash your car and be so proud of it.

"You're on a different road, I'm in the Milky Way

You want me down on earth, but I am up in space

You're so damn hard to please, we gotta kill this switch

You're from the 70's, but I'm a 90's bitch

I love it!"

Yepp, the lyrics are wierd. I like these crazy, no point lyrics a hundred times more than stupid love and/or trying to be deep songs though

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ConstantRyan

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Jesus I can't believe i forgot the one-two punch on Mellon Collie and the Infinite Sadness with "Emptiness is loneliness, and loneliness is cleanliness, And cleanliness is godliness, and god is empty just like me" and the whole of Bullet with Butterfly Wings. Makes you wonder how Billy Corgan managed to write the lyrics for 1979 in the same period.

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SpaceInsomniac

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I don't know if it made it Stateside, but Icona Pop has a song called I Love It that has the worst verse / chorus switch.

verse

I crashed my car into the bridge...

chorus

I don't care!

It's in so many commercials, and understanding the lyrics, I can't help but think how stupid it is to crash your car and be so proud of it.

I always thought that wasn't about being proud of crashing your car into a bridge, it was about admitting a mistake and not letting it affect you. Still kind of stupid lyrics, though, but they they're not complete nonsense.

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UlquioKani

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#37  Edited By UlquioKani

"Don't ever fix your lips like collagen, and say something when you gon' end up apologing"

Kanye West - Can't Tell Me Nothing

I still love the song but apologing isn't a word and I hear it super clearly every time I listen to it and cringe a little.

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jeffrud

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I remember buying Coldplay's X&Y as a lad, back when I still enjoyed their stuff. "Fix You" starts with a slow, sort of ethereal organ and I was hoping the song would have a little more lyrical meat than the ones that came before it. And then

when you try your best but don't succeeeeeeeed

when you get what you want but not what you neeeeeeeed

when you feel so tired but you can't sleeeeeeep

stuck in reveeeeeeeeeeeeeeerse

I made one of those great "Pssssshh" sounds, popped that fucker out the CD player and graduated to liking Dream Theater, a band with REAL lyrics.*

*most Dream Theater lyrics are ass

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jiggajoe14

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@billymaysrip: Some people claim that it means Calm, Cool & Collected (since 300 = CCC in Roman numerology). idk if that's truly the case, but I just think Yeezus is some cool ass pop music and the intensity with which he raps on that song I don't really think too much about it.

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Jimbo

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#40  Edited By Jimbo
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Corevi

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#41  Edited By Corevi

The OP to Gatchaman Crowds has hilariously nonsensical lyrics.

No Caption Provided

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ShaggE

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I'm almost embarrassed to even mention this one, as one gets a lot of shit for being a Marilyn Manson fan in this day and age anyway, but I was listening to High End of Low earlier... man. "Into The Fire". I forgot all about this one. By and large a standout track, but the first verse is like a cartoonish parody of Manson more than something he wrote himself. It's really, really bad, you guys. *sigh* Here we go:

This is the film, close to the third act and the misery

It's not rain, you rapist werewolves

It's God pissing down on you

We'll die alone

Cause I'll break off my own arms

Sharpen my bones

Stab you once for each time I thought of you

Trying to take something

You'll never be good enough to even look upon

My god. Where do I even begin? This is like something a person who has never actually heard Manson would assume his songs were like. At least the image of him fumbling with his sharpened severed arms is pretty funny. Too bad the song is supposed to be heartfelt and serious. It's not the first or last time MM has whiffed (Eat Me Drink Me has some real stinkers, as do a couple of other tracks on High End), but it's the most egregious example I can think of offhand.

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yukoasho

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#43  Edited By yukoasho
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"I'm trying to bathe my ape in your milky way"?

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EnemyLandlord

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@constantryan: Billy Corgans lyrics are uniformly terrible. He's a prime example of a guy who writes "deep" and/or "edgy" stuff that is more likely to be pretentious nonsense or ridiculous melodrama. He's written some of my favourite songs of all time, but if you pay attention to what he's saying it's embarrassing.

I used to put a lot of stock in lyrics before realising that most musicians in punk and alt-rock and whatnot aren't exactly poets. Now I set those expectations low and just go with whatever bullshit falls out of a singers mouth.

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Quarters

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I'm still not sure what "I'm tired, you tired, Jesus wept" means in Bound 2 by Kanye West. Actually, there's several Kanye lyrics are straight up baffling.

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EternalVigil

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"Thank for my breasts so small and humble

So you don't confuse them with mountains."

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yukoasho

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#47  Edited By yukoasho

"Thank for my breasts so small and humble

So you don't confuse them with mountains."

What fucking song is that? Never minding that "humble" and "mountains" don't rhyme, but what?

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EternalVigil

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#48  Edited By EternalVigil

@yukoasho said:

@eternalvigil said:

"Thank for my breasts so small and humble

So you don't confuse them with mountains."

What fucking song is that? Never minding that "humble" and "mountains" don't rhyme, but what?

Shakira- Whenever Wherever.

There was a line before that that ended in mumble, but I forget the rest. This line has been stuck in my mind for over a decade.

Also Life by Des'ree also gets merit for the one of the most retarded verses known to man.

I’m afraid of the dark,

‘specially when I’m in a park

And there’s no-one else around,

Ooh, I get the shivers.

I don’t want to see a ghost,

It’s a sight that I fear most.

I’d rather have a piece of toast

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Gruebacca

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"I know this place. It smells like innocence lost." Try to say those words without singing them, and tell me if they don't sound ridiculous. Like, that's the first thing I think of when I'm wondering about the loss of innocence: how it smells! I can see why Holden wanted to protect his little sister so bad because I bet it stinks!

I don't know if it made it Stateside, but Icona Pop has a song called I Love It that has the worst verse / chorus switch.

verse

I crashed my car into the bridge...

chorus

I don't care!

It's in so many commercials, and understanding the lyrics, I can't help but think how stupid it is to crash your car and be so proud of it.

That's the whole point of the song though, right? She simply doesn't care. She's saying, "Fuck it, man, and fuck you too!" Also, this song definitely made it big in the US. It was in the Most Wanted (2012) soundtrack.

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Royce_McCutcheon

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I find Metallica lyrics hysterical.

"My lifestyle determines my deathstyle"