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#1 Posted by Castiel (3473 posts) -

So I have lived in the same city for 28 years, which for me is my entire life, and it's time for me to move on. I feel like I can't grow as a person or achieve what I want if I stay here any longer. So I'm finally moving to a different city. In a different country. Where I'm going to live on a houseboat for nine months.

I've always wanted to see what it would be like if I lived in a completely different country where I didn't knew anyone. It's a big challenge and I can't wait to get started. More than anything I'm just looking for change.

It feels good to finally be moving on. Literally and figuratively.

The only thing I care about now is working towards achieving my dreams, instead of just dreaming about them, whether they involve traveling more, photography, work or further education. I just want to be true to myself in the moment. I'm done worrying about the future. I have lived with loneliness and depression and spent so much time being worried about what the future might bring. Feeling like I was failure because I wasn't where I wanted to be in my life. Socially or Professionally.

I recently went to Berlin. My second time there but my first time traveling abroad on my own. Part of me feared that it might be weird, or lonely, to travel on my own since I wouldn't have anyone to share it with. I couldn't have been more wrong. Being in Berlin on my own gave me a feeling of freedom and for the first time in a long time I finally forgot about the worries that haunted my mind at home. It's also super easy to meet new people when you travel on your own. Seriously if I had known before I would have travelled solo a lot sooner. I think anyone should try traveling on their own at least once in their life. And I say this as someone that has spent most of my late teens, and twenties, always feeling uncomfortable and out of place in most social situations. Heck, to some degree I still feel that way and I probably always will. But if you never try to challenge yourself and get out of your comfort zone you will never get anywhere in life. Sorry if that sounds harsh but that's just how I see it.

Before Berlin I had a strong suspicion that I might go abroad for a long time, since I didn't feel like I belonged in my own country anymore, but after Berlin I knew for sure that spending time abroad is where I belong. The world is my home now. There is simply too much for me to see and do for me to stay in one place.

Life should be an adventure and I'm finally starting my adventure.

But what about your life? What has been the biggest positive life changing decision you have made?

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#2 Edited by The_Greg (539 posts) -

Congratulations, well done, and keep going. It's always a good thing to take a long hard look at your life and your attitude towards it, then make the decision to change for the better.

For me, I was 18 and I was living at mum's with a slight video game addiction and no real excitement. I decided to go travelling and spent a few months in Australia, Vietnam and Hong Kong. It was absolutely incredible and life changing in the best possible way. When I got home, I moved out with friends into to a house closer to the city. I spent a few years living with them and I had the best times of my life there.

I'm 28 now and I've got the best girlfriend, an amazing 1-year-old son and I own a great home. I credit everything I have to that decision I made when I was 18.

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#3 Posted by cikame (2790 posts) -

I bought an air conditioner a couple years ago.
Typically not something people have in the UK, summer can be very hot but it's usually bearable with a fan or two, however my computer room is very small and on the sunny side of the house, so it's not uncommon for the temperature in here to exceed 30°c, combine that with the fact that i suffer from terrible hayfever so during the summer i'm usually mentally and physically destroyed, it does a great job at not only keeping the room very cool, but reducing my allergies AND preventing my CPU from overheating.
The AC unit is fairly loud, but i'm more than happy to put up with it for improving my life considerably.

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#4 Posted by FrostyRyan (2920 posts) -

I went to my first anime convention 3 years ago and met a group of friends.

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#5 Edited by NTM (11749 posts) -

There are things you can decide to do, or simply skip out on, and I have to say that I would have made a huge mistake if I decided to not help out a previous manager I had to move out of their house because in helping her, it allowed me to now have my dog. She was moving and could only take one of her dogs, I had mentioned that my family had been kind of interested in getting a dog (and, this was before she had said she could only take one of her dogs, so I wasn't really eyeing one of her dogs), and she had said that we could have the Cavalier King Charles Spaniel that you see as my avatar. I love him so much and he's brought so much happiness into my life. I can't say I've ever had depression, but having a dog still keeps the spirits up, and to be frank, alleviates a lot of negativity that could go on. I seem to remember more arguments in the house before we had him. This is why I sometimes question whether I should go somewhere if I'm asked even when I originally don't want to that much.

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#6 Edited by Cerberus3Dog (1025 posts) -

Meditating right now. I'm apprehensive to wholeheartedly suggest it because I've only been practicing for a month 20 minutes a day so I lack hindsight. I feel changed though and this feeling will apparently lessen and become more subtle I've read. Right now, I feel it's helped lessen my depressive slumps and reduce my anxiety about the future. My thoughts are more clear, I have an easier time focusing, I'm more mindful of my feelings, and more mindful about how I react to outside influences. It's something I would recommend people try.

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#7 Posted by Ravelle (3304 posts) -

I stopped taking things too personal, I stopped taking life too serious and stopped caring about a bunch of things plus I used to keep things inside for a long time, now I'm pretty outspoken and say what comes up in my head. All of this made my life so much more enjoyable and it got me a job I really love.

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#8 Posted by MattGiersoni (587 posts) -

Losing a ton of weight and getting more fit. I wasn't like crazy overweight or anything, more on the chubby side but it still made me personally feel bad often and I just wanted to change that. Exercise and diet can do amazing things. People totally look at me and treat me differently now (for the better ofc). I also gained a lot of confidence thanks to that and life overall just got way better. Aside from the above effects I just feel full of energy and I'm just way happier. The road hasn't been easy and it required a lot of determination and discipline from me but it was worth it. It's awesome.

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#9 Posted by pompouspizza (1563 posts) -

I had a vasectomy about a month ago and it’s a huge weight off my mind. I’m 27 so I’m younger than most people that do it, and I also have no kids. I have always known that I don’t want kids and I thought about getting a vasectomy for years but assumed I would never be allowed because of my age.

It feels really good to have made a final choice.

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#10 Posted by BrunoTheThird (829 posts) -

When I finally decided to invest seriously into my hobby of music composition/production instead of just messing around in FL Studio now and then, splashing out thousands on a powerful PC; DAW; audio interface; midi keyboard/controller; East West and Kontakt suites; studio monitoring headphones; and several music theory/composition/production courses. Best risk I ever took, and I'm happily in minor financial debt, as my music has gotten much, much better, and makes me happy to be alive. 350 active projects and counting.

Becoming vegan and switching permanently to oat milk helped me lose 30-50lbs and keep it off, and I feel better I'm not actively eating animals. Something didn't add up for me, and I don't miss saying "thank you mister pig/sheep/chicken" to make me feel better, forget that, I was being a hypocrite. I've also gained a greater respect for proper, clean hunting now I've become more knowledgeable about the industry. Plenty of insects are absorbed by plants, so I'd be lying if I thought I was truly living a herbivorous life, but I still feel, look, and sleep better. I never bring it up, though, as I don't think it's a 'movement', it's just a choice. Plus, I can't pretend I don't miss double bacon cheeseburgers every minute of the day, ha.

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#11 Posted by nutter (2110 posts) -

So, I’m pushing 40. There are so many damned decisions to look back on.

The highlights off the top of my head:

- Exposing myself to new music and rock clubs at 12, sparking a lifelong love of intimate, high energy crowds and music

- Deciding to propose to my girlfriend as a teenager (we’ve been together over 20 years now)

- Dropping out of my University and getting in on technology, it’s been fun and rewarding where college bored me

- Having kids (even if the older one is entering teenage territory...there’s no “fixing” this phase, but I still have to point his bullshit out to him)

- Deciding to repair my severely injured back (I could barely walk for about two years

- Deciding to combat my stress with positivity, ending a period of ulcers and shingles in my 20s

- Deciding age ain’t shit after fixing my body and getting back into live music (lots of great stuff out there ignored by radio) as welll as discovering a love of hiking, backpacking, weightlighting, and overall fitness

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#12 Posted by nutter (2110 posts) -

This thread is super cool for perspective.

I’ve read every post in here so far, all great stuff. Congrats, folks!

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#13 Posted by Inresurrection (463 posts) -

@cerberus3dog: The coolest part about meditation is that there is no end goal. There is no end result that you are supposed to achieve - it's not supposed to make you a better person. It's a practice, so that you can apply that practice to different aspects of your life. You do it regardless of if you're failing that day or not - just go with the flow and don't resist. Return to the breath, label everything else as thinking. Your mind plays some pretty hilarious tricks sometimes, even so far as telling you you're doing a great job at this meditation thing. "Keep going! You're doing great!" Label it as thinking, return to the breath.

Sometimes I laugh out loud at how many tricks the mind will play to try to get you to think again. It's its job, after all!

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#14 Posted by Toxin066 (3539 posts) -

Stretching every night before bed + ZMA supplement has vastly improved my sleep quality, which in turn has led to a better me.

Finding and eventually marrying my wife. She's my rock and it's difficult to put in to words what it means to have someone by your side like that.

Stumbling across the powerlifting & strength club at my university almost 8 years ago. Lifting has done wonders for my mental and physical health.

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#15 Edited by lead_dispencer (534 posts) -

@cerberus3dog: how have you gone about starting? It’s something I’ve thought about but haven’t done more than entertain the thought. I’m thinking about reading dans book and the book he recommends (although I can’t remember it)

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#16 Posted by Bane (912 posts) -

20-ish years ago I moved out of my parents house and in with my best friend pretty much on a whim. We had an absolutely crazy social life for a good number of years. At first it was all him, but after awhile it became a team effort. I was pulled out of my shell, had so many experiences, and made so many good memories. It was one of the best times of my life.

More recently, I bought a house. My commute used to be 45-60 minutes on a good day, twice that on a bad day. Now it's four minutes, maybe six if it snows really bad. Getting nearly two hours a day of my life back, and not having any more traffic stress has been amazing.

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#17 Posted by Naoiko (1676 posts) -

I decided to get married, and moved from one side of the country to the other (that I'd never been anywhere near) in a very short period of time. I do not regret it now, cause it saved me on so many levels. I've grown so much since then, and I'm proud to say our marriage is going strong. I've learned so much about myself and the world, and I've had my best friend at my side during it all.

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#18 Edited by bybeach (6350 posts) -

I stopped smoking (a long time ago) It was hard. My brain loves nicotine. The first 6 months were quite intense. Then for years I dealt with irrational strong urges for some kind of dose, I think even a patch would have satisfied me. If I think now about it now something like vaping even becomes a positive.

But the whole thing is quiescent now. I just could not stand these days to be in thrall to nicotine. It could be I might be addiction prone, but winning that battle has given me a mind set that has done me well.

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#19 Posted by Nick (1039 posts) -

I moved from Vancouver to Buenos Aires when I was 26, stayed for 3 years. I can't understate the benefits of moving to a new place with a different culture, and learning the language. it literally changes the way you think.

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#20 Edited by Cerberus3Dog (1025 posts) -

@lead_dispencer: I'll try my best to describe how I started. Like you, I was interested in books to try to find the right framework to approach the subject from. I started out on Reddit's meditation subreddit wiki, reading the wiki and looking over the booklist to try to grasp why people meditated. Both books I read, Henepola Gunaratana's Mindfulness in Plain English and Alan Watts' The Way of Zen, had useful insights for meditation practice and may help you, but I found them both lacking in explaining the initial question of "why meditate over spending my time reading philosophy, or learning about human psychology, or reading self-help books?". I got a little fed up not getting sufficient answers and just decided to try it.

Meditating is deceptively simple, here is a simple form of meditation from the subreddit wiki:

  • Set a timer for your desired length of meditation.
  • Sit upright on a chair, cushion or rolled up towel, with your back straight.
  • Close your eyes. Breathe through your nose.
  • As your breath rises and falls, bring your mind gently to the feeling of the air moving in and out around the tips of your nostrils. Keep your mind there.

Once I started practicing, that is where some of the book material came in handy. It helped explain if my mind was in the right place. It helped describe what I should do when my mind wanders. I didn't feel different from reading those books, I started noticing things differently when I finally started practicing meditation.

Again I'm hesitating to suggest anything because what I found that worked for me, might not work for you. I'd recommend you do enough research to get some idea what to expect when you practice meditation and then actually try it. If any problems arise during meditation and you don't know how to deal with it, go back to your resources and do some googling. That's about as far along the journey as I am now. I'm not an expert by any means, but I can say actually doing it with the right mindset (by reading other people's wisdom and experience) was where I began noticing differences. It's not a "get well quick" scheme, it's a process that takes actual effort, but so far I've found that setting aside 20 minutes a day to be wholly worthwhile.

@inresurrection: I agree with everything you've said. It's a process, not an end product. I just remember trying to get myself to start, a lot of it sounded like nonsense. "What do you mean I'm just supposed to sit down and do nothing and not think!?" It's an active activity of being mindful of what distractions are rising up in your head, being aware of how you react to them, and then remembering not to judge, block, embrace, or avoid these feelings. You simply watch them, let them fade away, and return to the breath. And this "being aware of your feelings" carries on to other aspects of your life. It's been great so far.

@brunothethird: I'm right there with you on the vegan thing. I was experiencing some cognitive dissonance realizing that I was not OK with factory farming and the horrible conditions our livestock is kept under and then when dinnertime rolled around, dismissing the thought so I could take a big bite out of a delicious, bacon cheeseburger. Like you too, my mouth waters when I smell cooked sausage haha. It is a philosophy for me, I can do something to reduce suffering so I decided to do it, even though it does cause me to sacrifice something (i.e. delicious, tasty burgers). I do feel healthier and a bit more at peace with myself and that idea to reduce suffering has spread into my other thoughts on politics and society. I past a year this July, but I have failed a couple of times by getting a milkshake.

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#21 Posted by Ben_H (4187 posts) -

This thread is great! It's really inspiring for me. It's making me think a lot about moving to a different city. I've never felt like I fit in where I currently live, and last year we did a trip somewhere that I immediately loved and felt at home at. This is definitely something to think about.

For me, saving up enough money to quit working for a few months so I can focus on myself has been quite helpful. I had a very tough last three years with one of my parents being terminally ill and slowly dying (they passed in February) and I never had a chance to recharge the whole time because something was always happening with appointments and I was spending a good part of my day caring for them. When they passed, I didn't give myself any time to recover and tried to keep busy before I finally burned out in April.

So I quit my job, and have taken the whole summer off. In that time I have learned how to record and mix music, learned video editing (which resulted in me making this monstrosity as a first project), became a much better musician, got back into fitness, learned to cook many new things and refined other recipes I already knew, refreshed my knowledge in programming and learned a whole bunch of new things (I'll be trying to find work doing this), and a whole bunch more.

My next focuses will be finding new work (I have no interest in going back to my old job), getting my own place, and who knows what else.

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#22 Posted by ripelivejam (13161 posts) -

@nutter said:

- Deciding to combat my stress with positivity, ending a period of ulcers and shingles in my 20s

I should maybe heed this more strongly. As much as I don't believe in jinxes and have a general opinion that attitude doesn't really effect change in reality, it's still strange how much I hear emotional stress manifest itself in physical issues. I wonder how much my health would approve just with an attitude adjustment (and therapy which I probably need a lot of too).

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#23 Edited by reap3r160 (242 posts) -

I'm still looking for that one thing, and this thread has been a great motivator if anything.

Currently stuck in a contractor position just sort of sitting and waiting for a position to open up, currently live by myself in a house, but still just feel sort of stuck and like I'm just "going through the motions". Can't really afford to move(again) or go on a huge vacation atm unfortunately.

Again this thread, and this community in general, has been a great source of inspiration and hope for sure.

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#24 Edited by Casepb (674 posts) -

I guess buying a house and getting me a dog? I still live in the same city and all, but I have no desire whatsoever to live far away from my family and friends. I honestly never understood those that do. To each their own though. I guess I've always been super close to my family is why.

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#25 Posted by Geepatrick (6 posts) -

Converted to Catholicism and married my wonderful wife. I know, the worst kind of post, but it is true! With that came quitting a bunch of destructive stuff, traveling more and being way more optimistic. It's all related for me.

That being said, I did move away from my home town for a few years out of high school and got a lot out of my system. I was lucky to be able to choose to settle down instead of getting there by a lack of opportunities.

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#26 Posted by PerfidiousSinn (943 posts) -

Moving out of my mom's house. Had some depression & anxiety issues about still living at home after university, and our relationship was pretty strained due to some family stuff.

So I got out, and the space & time helped us sort out our issues. We get along a lot better now and I'm still very happy that I can live alone.

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#27 Posted by nutter (2110 posts) -

@ripelivejam: So, mine was all work related. Some was pre-kids, some was after having my first born.

I just took shit deadly seriously. It impacted stress levels and my well-being. Both were said to be related to stress by my doctors.

I just kinda woke-up and said “this career isn’t worth this; either figure out how to do it with less stress or find a new livelihood.”

I think perspective is huge, and we tend to fret about more than we should. I live more for today, these days. I look to the future, and I learn from the past, but I live for today.

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#28 Posted by Ben_H (4187 posts) -
@nutter said:

I just kinda woke-up and said “this career isn’t worth this; either figure out how to do it with less stress or find a new livelihood.”

I think perspective is huge, and we tend to fret about more than we should. I live more for today, these days. I look to the future, and I learn from the past, but I live for today.

That's a big struggle I'm having right now. My old job was the opposite of what your old job sounds like it was. It was low stress and fun, but was very physical and I was starting to have signs of it getting to me (my back and shoulders were constantly in pain and I was getting nerve issues in my hands). An older guy I worked with there who had done it for many years had warned me that it would get to me if I didn't stop sooner rather than later. He had to go on medical leave and have two separate major shoulder surgeries about a year ago and that was one of the cues to me that I needed to do something else. With everything else that happened I knew it was time for change.

Now I have to decide if I want some kind of office job that could potentially be stressful but pay better and be less physical, or something else more hands-on that's perhaps a little less tough on the back.

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#29 Posted by pompouspizza (1563 posts) -

@ripelivejam: I get pretty bad hives due to anxiety and have to take antihistamines daily to help. Anxiety has changed my skin in pretty alarming ways, for example; if I scratch very lightly it will look like I’ve been scratching really hard for ages.

I have just started therapy again and I’m really trying to adopt a more positive attitude.

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#30 Posted by pompouspizza (1563 posts) -

@casepb: I guess it’s all about perspective. I moved away from my family about 6 years ago and would really struggle going back. To be honest, I rarely go back to my hometown because it brings back too many bad memories and makes me think about things I don’t want to think about.

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#31 Posted by nutter (2110 posts) -

@ben_h: I remember being 22 and working a manual labor gig building out the interior of a Staples.

I was young, healthy, and full of scorn for these old

men who took so many damned breaks. I was going to build that store with or without them through hard work and determination.

They put up with me. They warned me that it would catch-up with me. They probably enjoyed not having to do as much with everything I was doing.

Anyhow, I learned. I swallowed my pride, told them they were right (of course they were, they’d been at it for years), and I slowed down. My body was a mess for a while, recovering from working too hard for too many days in a row.

If I drive by a road crew and half of them are sitting, someone in the car might comment on them being lazy. I offer my perspecitve and they usually come around.

As for office work...it is what it is. You have to find things about it you enjoy and focus on those. I’m in IT. I enjoyed putting out fires for years, but eventually realized that much easier (and less exciting) work would get you more money and praise.

In an office, it’s about understanding the company, department, and team’s goals. Push toward supporting those goals, line up folks to support you, etc.

I’m in a fortune 500, so sometimes it takes an act of congress to change things that seem obvious. If you go towards a large organization, be prepared to swallow frustration and bide your time.

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#32 Posted by nutter (2110 posts) -

@pompouspizza: These days, I just get muscle tightness from stress, and sometime an attitude (I’m weening myself off of soda, so that’s NOT helping).

I workout a bunch, so that doesn’t help with muscle tightness either, though it’s a good stress reliever.

The only thing I’ve done to combat symptoms of stress with a professional has been massage. My back gets to be a hot mess of tight muscles, so I’m trying to go every other month. It’s been working out well so far.

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#33 Posted by pompouspizza (1563 posts) -

@nutter: that’s good! I have a disability and as a result I fatigue very easily and if I’m anxious and tense it makes it a lot worse so I have to do something to try and manage my stress.

I relate to old people a lot because I feel like a young man in an old mans body which there’s nothing I can do about, but I can try and find ways to manage my stress so I don’t make anything worse.

I have had my disability since birth though, which I’m very grateful for because I don’t think I would cope as well if I knew any other way.

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#34 Posted by Waredigo (6 posts) -

Ok.. so I guess this thread happened at the perfect time, because I've literally just completed my ultimate "life move" to the one place that I've always wanted to be... and after spending roughly 10 years thinking about it every day and wanting to be here.

Now don't get me wrong, I've been lucky enough to have traveled the world and lived in many cities/states throughout the USA (born in the USA) but I always just went with the flow of jobs, promotions, and life-events up to this point.

Please keep in mind, I had a GREAT job where I was, a great life and everything. There was no real logical reason for me to leave... except that I just didn't like where I was, and I knew I wanted something else. The fact that I wanted it for so long only confirming that point.

So I tried working with my employer for about 1 year to get a relo, but nothing came of it even after multiple attempts. If i wanted the move to happen, I would have to make it happen and take control. So I made the decision and didn't look back.

I gave my notice to my employer (and worked with them for weeks to ensure a smooth transition) and began the process of looking for housing, jobs, etc. in the new location.

Then a funny thing happened. Less than 24 hours before the HR systems would process my exit, I received a phone call from my company.

I had 2 possible roles waiting for me in my new location, all I had to do was pick one. You can only imagine the feelings of "oh god, this was meant to be" going through my head and heart.

Now don't get me wrong. I'm highlighting the positive moments of this recent journey, but make no mistake... moving is (or at the very least, can be) extremely stressful and financially daunting challenge. Especially if you're a frugal person.

That said, I actually feel complete for the first time in a long time now. That's a very strange thing for me to write, but it's true. I know I'm where I should be. Things in life are just clicking better than they used to. They're clicking like I knew they always should have.

I can't say that I regret not having moved here sooner, because the events in the last 10 years taught me a lot.. but I will say that making that decision to move, carrying through with the move (and all the stuff that went with it) is without a doubt the single most rewarding thing I've ever done for myself.

I absolutely love my life now, and my desire to "live more" is stronger than ever. Hope this helps =)

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#35 Edited by ShadyPingu (1807 posts) -

Three and a half years ago, I was lifting boxes in a warehouse in the Bay Area, with no idea what I wanted to do with my life and contemplating killing myself. The best decision I've ever made was to pack up everything and move to New York, go to grad school, and find an editorial job in the publishing industry.

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#36 Posted by Dixavd (2895 posts) -

During my most severe episode of suicidal depression, I kept thinking about ending it all on Waterloo Bridge (London, UK): instead I walked to the Samaritans charity and spoke with someone for a few hours before heading home finally able to cross the River Thames without fear. Things haven't been easy but I've been diagnosed with OCD (with depression as a symptom) and am getting lots of support. I took time away from University after it but I'm heading back next month. I'm still here. I feel hopeful.

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#37 Posted by nutter (2110 posts) -

@pompouspizza: Attitude and outlook were huge for my stress management. Positivity is TOUGH with chronic pain, though.

I started off by just deciding to be more positive. It was a little awkward and forced at first, but I think people trade in negativity and division so much that negativity grows to feel normal. Being positive, assuming positive intent, and just not letting shit bring you down feels so natural these days...and it’s great.

Cutting off most of my news consumption and social media helped a lot as well. When you consider what we absorb, so much of it is exceedingly negative. I just find it toxic, these days. It’s all there to drive commercials, clicks, anger, turmoil...I’m not down for selling my happiness to CNN, Fox, or some troll on Twitter.

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#38 Posted by wollywoo (253 posts) -

@castiel said:

My second time there but my first time traveling abroad on my own. Part of me feared that it might be weird, or lonely, to travel on my own since I wouldn't have anyone to share it with. I couldn't have been more wrong. Being in Berlin on my own gave me a feeling of freedom and for the first time in a long time I finally forgot about the worries that haunted my mind at home. It's also super easy to meet new people when you travel on your own.

That is interesting. I would never think of doing this as I am rather self-conscious about being alone. For me it doesn't seem possible to meet anybody unless I already have some acquaintance in common. Do you just go to bars and chat up strangers there? Or people you stay with in a hostel/airbnb type situation? Why is it easier to meet people abroad that at home? I feel like it would have the opposite effect for me, and I would end up wandering around going to museums and things by myself and then collapsing in a hotel without finding anybody to say a word to. But maybe I am wrong.

For me the biggest decision has been going to grad school. I had never lived outside of my home city at that point, so it was a pretty jarring change. But, well worth it in the end for the experiences and the friends I've made there.

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#39 Posted by Sweep (10595 posts) -

I lived in England and worked in London pretty much my whole life, until I moved to Singapore a few years ago. I don't know if I'll stay here forever but it's definitely popped the London bubble for me and opened my mind to the possibility of living in other cities around the world, which I feel is some pretty healthy perspective.

After smoking cigarettes every day for ten years I went cold turkey without telling anyone. That was around 3 years ago and I feel much better for it.

Deleting my facebook account about 4 years ago has had big repercussions both on my general productivity and in the way I think about the things I do - not feeling the need to snap a picture of everything to share on social media means I can stay present and enjoy each moment.

Ironically having a serious health scare last year has made me much more conscious of my physical wellbeing and I'm now taking much better care of myself. Meditation and yoga, hiking, and generally eating much healthier food and drinking less alcohol, have all contributed to making me feel (and look) a lot better than I did before.

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#40 Posted by DinosaurCanada (938 posts) -

Haven't had that moment yet. Too scared and anxious to make huge decisions.

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#41 Posted by JoRoNimo (350 posts) -

Actually going in and fixing my financials. I wasn't great with credit when I was younger, and now that I'm thinking about things like homeownership, it almost seemed insurmountable. But, once I committed that first vital step of actually, y'know, facing the problem instead of just having it as a cloud over me, I've been able to make great strides and better my living situation. I'll own my very first home sometime within the next year, if it all goes to plan!

Other than that, I've spent the last 8 months or so in a concerted effort to eat better and take more care of my body. I feel great, and more confident than ever. Yeah, it sucks when I say no to a late night pizza or another round of beer, but I feel good, and it's totally worth it. Down about 20-25 pounds, and clothes aren't really fitting well anymore - in a good way!

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#42 Posted by nutter (2110 posts) -

@sweep: Social media is awful and hopefully it’s a trend that dies or dies down (wishful thinking).

It’s all appearances, bullshit, drama, and turmoil.

I’m almost ashamed to say how much better I felt about life after leaving it behind.

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#43 Edited by soulcake (2753 posts) -

I learned Linux and it changed my life. I know it sound cheesy.

Decent income great job, different work environment where experimenting with the latest stuff is encouraged. And i feel mentally more healthier "fuck man working in retail really kills your mental health"

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#44 Edited by Wolfstein_3D (289 posts) -

Getting into running.

Did so at the age of 19 when I stopped playing soccer - since my work didn't allow me to make the soccer training session reliably anymore.

I am much more healthy overall both physically and mentally since then.

Second to that getting off all social media platforms.

At the end of the day it's either like minded people circle jerking or opposed ones shouting at each other - it added no positive value to my life and was a major waste of time.

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#45 Posted by CupOfDoom (95 posts) -

Putting a little bit of effort into my appearance. Just a couple of minutes a day has massively boosted my self-esteem and overall happiness.

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#46 Posted by Kitamuramiike (6 posts) -

28, history of depression. Got help, started meds, meditation, cognitive behavioral changes, working out, etc. It's given me a lot of perspective, but there was something still off. I couldn't put my finger on it. Then my current office job started looking a lot less secure (company in the red, layoffs) and I started looking for new work...and had a realization. I don't enjoy what I do. It's not terrible; I don't hate it, but I take no joy from it, no satisfaction. So I started looking at what I really enjoy doing and what I'm good at...so now I'm getting published. Short stories 99 cents, but it's the dream. I'm anxious as hell about it, but it's the kind of fear that comes with a big change, the kind that part of you doesn't want to make, but another part knows you NEED to make.

This thread is really great, btw. Kudos to everybody here.

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#47 Posted by dudeglove (13736 posts) -

If we can include school, it's having the opportunity to learn Russian 20 years ago. It forever altered the course of my life.

Disregarding school, it's starting tango dancing eight years ago which has done so many things for me they're hard to list.

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#48 Posted by The_Greg (539 posts) -

Disregarding school, it's starting tango dancing eight years ago which has done so many things for me they're hard to list.

I really want you to elaborate on this.

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#49 Posted by dudeglove (13736 posts) -

@the_greg said:
@dudeglove said:

Disregarding school, it's starting tango dancing eight years ago which has done so many things for me they're hard to list.

I really want you to elaborate on this.

Fine. Off the top of my head...

Due to the gender imbalance at my school (very typical for there to be way more women than men), after two years I was made into a volunteer (and got classes for free because I was an in-demand guy). For about a good year and a half I was spending up to three hours a night at the school.

From the social end of things as a result of volunteering and interacting with so many people of different ages, abilities and physical appearances (and good lord some of the body odours) I became a far more patient person - you have to be if you want to teach people dancing, especially if they're obese ladies in their 50s. This might seem insignificant but I was a very quick-tempered person. Nowadays I am a lot more calm than I used to be.

From the physical end of things, spending three hours a day at a dance school (I don't do it anywhere near as much now, and instead do much more focused practice), you will end up becoming fit regardless as you're basically walking a good couple of kilometers each time. I am far less conscious of my physical appearance and don't have as many hang ups about my figure like I used to. I'm also literally an inch or two taller because I don't slouch any more.

After my first year I decided to take things more seriously, and flew to Buenos Aires (this is about 30 hours of traveling with the transfer in Madrid from Moscow) with the school for two weeks, getting private lessons and learning the social event end of things which was equivalent to diving in at the deep end and cemented my desire to keep doing it. I returned to the city far more confident and capable of dancing in a social setting, as prior to that I was completely hopeless.

In the third year, I was asked by one of our students, who was writing a book on tango, to perform at his book presentation. He presented me with a signed copy, thanking me for performing.

On a more personal level, I've made many friends around the world as a result, not just in Russia, and I've gone to events all across Europe and danced in multiple cities in the world (furthest west - Seattle, furthest east - Seoul).

Of course it's not all rosy fun stuff. I've had to visit physiotherapists multiple times to sort out my back, knees and other muscles due to bad posture and decrease the amount of dancing I'd do because I'm not an athlete, not to mention any number of broken hearts including my own (but hey, that's tango, baby, and Roger Ebert has a wonderful closing line in his review on the film The Tango Lesson that is succinct and to the point), but if I have any regrets, it's that I didn't start sooner.

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#50 Posted by Tesla (2296 posts) -

Hiking. It combines the endorphins from exercise with those from camping or being out in nature for extended periods. I try to go once a week; it’s the perfect way to reset and recenter. There’s something innately satisfying and primal about it, almost spiritual.