Today in 'Wait, What?' Game Announcements: Majesco Producing Hulk Hogan Kinect Game

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alex

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Edited By alex

At least once or twice a week, a press release falls into my inbox that involuntarily forces me to make that comically confused puppy face. You know, the one where your head cocks to the side violently, your mouth twists into a kind of half-smirk, half-frown, and your brow furrows into an almost painful scrunch, all out of sheer, unadulterated bewilderment?

Tear-away tank top not included.
Tear-away tank top not included.

I had that reaction today when I read Majesco's press release announcement of Hulk Hogan's Main Event, a wrestling game of sorts created exclusively for Kinect. Panic Button LLC., the makers of such fine casual products as Attack of the Movies 3D, and Go Play Lumberjacks, is developing the title.

So what does a Kinect wrestling game entail? I... don't really know...

I've read this press release a half-dozen times now, and its description of a game in which players "train with mentor Hulk Hogan as they build their own wrestling personalities and learn the art of showmanship to win over the crowd" still doesn't quite compute. The release then goes on to describe learning more than "30 punishing combos" and how the Kinect sensor will track "players’ every move; the more dynamic the motion, the more high impact the wrestler’s performance is." It also mentions things like a dynamic wrestler creation mode and different weapons you can wield, but nowhere does it explain what any ofthis means.

Hulk Hogan, for his part, was no help at all.

== TEASER ==

“Listen up, people! You will feel the power of Hulkamania when you step into this game,” said Hulk Hogan. “Whether you are taking the damage or selling the pain, this game will let you unleash your inner wrestler as you hype up the crowd while putting the hurt on anyone that stands in your way!”

Ack! I feel like I'm taking crazy pills! How does any of this work? Will I be clotheslining at empty air? Am I going to be leg-dropping my coffee table? Should I go out and buy one of those old WWF Wrestling Buddies? Without images or video, and only this barely existent website for context, I'm grasping at straws here, people. I guess we'll find out more at E3? Probably?

As a final aside, this press release might contain my favorite useless, barely-contextual quote from a guy in a suit in a good long while.

Hulk Hogan’s longtime marketing agent, Darren Prince, CEO of Prince Marketing Group, said “When we started discussions with Majesco on the format of this game we knew it was a perfect fit for Hulk’s global brand.”

That's it. That's the entire quote. Cool story, bro?

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alex

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#1  Edited By alex

At least once or twice a week, a press release falls into my inbox that involuntarily forces me to make that comically confused puppy face. You know, the one where your head cocks to the side violently, your mouth twists into a kind of half-smirk, half-frown, and your brow furrows into an almost painful scrunch, all out of sheer, unadulterated bewilderment?

Tear-away tank top not included.
Tear-away tank top not included.

I had that reaction today when I read Majesco's press release announcement of Hulk Hogan's Main Event, a wrestling game of sorts created exclusively for Kinect. Panic Button LLC., the makers of such fine casual products as Attack of the Movies 3D, and Go Play Lumberjacks, is developing the title.

So what does a Kinect wrestling game entail? I... don't really know...

I've read this press release a half-dozen times now, and its description of a game in which players "train with mentor Hulk Hogan as they build their own wrestling personalities and learn the art of showmanship to win over the crowd" still doesn't quite compute. The release then goes on to describe learning more than "30 punishing combos" and how the Kinect sensor will track "players’ every move; the more dynamic the motion, the more high impact the wrestler’s performance is." It also mentions things like a dynamic wrestler creation mode and different weapons you can wield, but nowhere does it explain what any ofthis means.

Hulk Hogan, for his part, was no help at all.

== TEASER ==

“Listen up, people! You will feel the power of Hulkamania when you step into this game,” said Hulk Hogan. “Whether you are taking the damage or selling the pain, this game will let you unleash your inner wrestler as you hype up the crowd while putting the hurt on anyone that stands in your way!”

Ack! I feel like I'm taking crazy pills! How does any of this work? Will I be clotheslining at empty air? Am I going to be leg-dropping my coffee table? Should I go out and buy one of those old WWF Wrestling Buddies? Without images or video, and only this barely existent website for context, I'm grasping at straws here, people. I guess we'll find out more at E3? Probably?

As a final aside, this press release might contain my favorite useless, barely-contextual quote from a guy in a suit in a good long while.

Hulk Hogan’s longtime marketing agent, Darren Prince, CEO of Prince Marketing Group, said “When we started discussions with Majesco on the format of this game we knew it was a perfect fit for Hulk’s global brand.”

That's it. That's the entire quote. Cool story, bro?

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somethingepic

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#2  Edited By somethingepic

shirt ripping simulator i hope

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Loopah

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#3  Edited By Loopah

Wow nice.

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PhatSeeJay

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#4  Edited By PhatSeeJay

This just in: Wait, what?

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Winternet

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#5  Edited By Winternet

Majesco is playing it hard.

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sungahymn

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#6  Edited By sungahymn

...

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hockeymask27

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#7  Edited By hockeymask27

yappie strap match time! 
 
  

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SensuousLettuce

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#8  Edited By SensuousLettuce

I heard that the game ships with a 700 lb beanbag pack inso that you can relive the culminating moment of wrestling history when Hulk slammed Andre.   I'm in for two copies.

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ShaneDev

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#9  Edited By ShaneDev

There is the killer app software for Kinect, I knew Microsoft would deliver.

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JoeyRavn

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#10  Edited By JoeyRavn

Hulk Hogan with Kinect? Well, naturally.

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louiedog

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#11  Edited By louiedog

Is the final boss an empty shell of yourself who you have to fight to keep from becoming a pathetic reality TV personality?

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deactivated-5e4c09d3ba1b3

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No Caption Provided
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craigbo180

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#13  Edited By craigbo180

Fuck. 
 
 
 
Now I have to buy a Kinect.

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Animasta

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#14  Edited By Animasta

how do I sell pain

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Stew

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#15  Edited By Stew

This game could be life-changing

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knownspace

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#16  Edited By knownspace

Without "Real American" it will be but a shell of what could have been.

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mnzy

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#17  Edited By mnzy
@louiedog said:
Is the final boss an empty shell of yourself who you have to fight to keep from becoming a pathetic reality TV personality?
You win if Hulk becomes your father-in-law. You win life.
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Olivaw

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#18  Edited By Olivaw
@knownspace said:
Without "Real American" it will be but a shell of what could have been.
Yeah if Real American is not present then this is NOT a true Hulk Hogan game.
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afrokola

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#19  Edited By afrokola

Guess I'll be needing to buy a bunch of new shirts after playing this.

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deactivated-5d7bd9e4bef30

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@Hockeymask27 said:
yappie strap match time! 
 
  
No Caption Provided
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#21  Edited By buft
@somethingepic said:
shirt ripping simulator i hope
thats definitely a mini game i imagine.
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metalmoog

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#22  Edited By metalmoog

Hogan is an icon I grew up watching and idolizing as a young man. Seeing him on The Hour with Strombo, a shell of his former self, depressed and ruined by his ex wife I felt for the dude. Glad to see Hogan is picking himself back up again in life, just like he did in the ring for so many years. Wrestling isn't the same now as it was back in the 80's.

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Kyle

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#23  Edited By Kyle
I am very excited for this thrilling extension of the Hulk global brand. 
I am very excited for this thrilling extension of the Hulk global brand. 
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jkuc316

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#24  Edited By jkuc316

Do you have to do the Atomic Leg Drop?

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MichaelBach

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#25  Edited By MichaelBach

I think this game will destroy many living rooms. Hope they demo it at E3.

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Zaph

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#26  Edited By Zaph

I will be strongly disappointed if there is no 'touching-your-daughter-inappropriately' mini-game.

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mpfitz13

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#27  Edited By mpfitz13

I'll have my friends over for a royal rumble and fucking trash the place...

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phish09

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#28  Edited By phish09

I really hope they include some yellow speedo's as a pre-order incentive...I can't seem to find them anywhere.

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muyskerm

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#29  Edited By muyskerm

I have always thought "Man it would be cool to wave my arms around and take down the Macho Man" 

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Chris2KLee

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#30  Edited By Chris2KLee

I hope they have a section of the game where Hogan teaches you to politic your way to the top of a company, then run it into the ground.

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oldenglishc

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#31  Edited By oldenglishc

Will his burly man-daughter be dlc?

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#32  Edited By Davin
@Rmack: You are my hero.
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Skooky

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#33  Edited By Skooky

Is he going to flash his dick at us again in promos for this game?

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Duecenage

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#34  Edited By Duecenage

"Hype up the crowd" eh? I'm betting there'll also be a minigame where you twirl your hand to cup your ear egging the crowd to cheer louder.

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TadThuggish

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#35  Edited By TadThuggish

Gary Whitta needs a towel, you guys.

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PaleEye

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#36  Edited By PaleEye

This sounds horrible.  About as bad as the sequel to Yogi Bear announced earlier today..

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MEATBALL

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#37  Edited By MEATBALL

Majesco is mad crazy, yo.

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ajamafalous

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#38  Edited By ajamafalous
@Rmack said:


No Caption Provided
@TeflonBilly said:

@Hockeymask27 said:

yappie strap match time! 
 
  
No Caption Provided
I love everything about all of this. Can't believe I never fucking thought about using a Jim Cornette reaction image to wrestling-related posts on these forums.
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deactivated-5d7bd9e4bef30

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@ajamafalous: Cornette-face is awesome. He was talking about printing up t-shirts with that pic
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Erotolepsy

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#40  Edited By Erotolepsy

I can only hope this game lives up to the standard of quality set by the Hulk Hogan Ultimate Grill.
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#41  Edited By TheFreeMan

This is the greatest thing I have ever heard.

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#42  Edited By Milkman

Yappapi Strap match or no sell.

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GrandMarshal

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#43  Edited By GrandMarshal

this is THE best thing to happen to kinect

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tourgen

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#44  Edited By tourgen

pretty good news.  better than another yoga simulator or whatever.

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Xpgamer7

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#45  Edited By Xpgamer7

A Hogan game from a crap game team? I just want fun games....

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Pkshields

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#46  Edited By Pkshields

I can think of no one better to put in a bad Kinect game than Hogan.

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Seroth

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#47  Edited By Seroth

Looking forward to the Quick Look.

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KaneRobot

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#48  Edited By KaneRobot

Laugh if you must, but if this game lets you Hulk Up...
 
1) Mimic throwing someone off of you just before the three count 
2) Get up to one knee and shake your head in refusal as the CPU character punches you
3) Begin shaking violently as the computer continues to punch you 
4) Get on your feet and walk all crazy around the ring (still shaking) 
5) POINT YOUR FINGER AT THE OPPONENT 
6) Blocked punch/three punches/big boot/legdrop sequence 
 
...I'll buy a mo'fuckin Kinect.

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MaxxS

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#49  Edited By MaxxS

What the H?

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#50  Edited By Dalai

Totally still own one of those WWF Wrestling Buddies, but I have the Hulk Hogan one so it'd be awkward clotheslining Hulk Hogan as Hulk Hogan, brother.

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