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    Minecraft

    Game » consists of 33 releases. Released May 17, 2009

    A 3D procedurally-generated game of world exploration, resource harvesting, and freeform construction, featuring a unique block-based art style and online multiplayer. It received numerous ports and updates for nearly a decade after its initial release.

    Yo fool should I buy Minecraft? (An excercise in rapping)

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    deactivated-5fb7c57ae2335

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    Yo G Dawg 
    I heard about Minecraft 
    People are sayin'  
    it's way better than CrimeCraft. 
    All I know about it 
    Is that the graphics are shitty 
    So tell me about it 
    Get down to the nitty gritty. 
    Strafe from the skeletons 
    And somethin' about giant spiders 
    I don't think there are any melons 
    And there better not be biters. 
    So tell me G 
    So I can see 
    Should I craft mines 
    Even if it's not free?

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    ShaunassNZ

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    #2  Edited By ShaunassNZ

    Yes.

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    W0lfbl1tzers

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    #3  Edited By W0lfbl1tzers

    Just stick it in her pooper

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    Jimbo

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    #4  Edited By Jimbo
    Whaaaaat!
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    eezo

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    #5  Edited By eezo

    yeaaaaaaaaaaahhh boooooooooooiiiiiiii

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    Jack268

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    #6  Edited By Jack268

    No Caption Provided
    I will never find a more appropriate situation to post this 
    better take the chance 
    when the mods see this 
    they'll be dealing out bans 
     
     
    Also, to answer your question: 
    Minecraft is a game about air and dirt, 
    and fucking redstone - how does that work?
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    BraveToaster

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    #7  Edited By BraveToaster
    @InfamousBIG:  
     
    Let me lay it down proper 
    Minecraft is a boredom stopper 
    You build a gansta empire 
    Make the hoes call you sire  
    There's sand, dirt, and gold 
    Or you can dig in the cold 
    Build a house with a moat 
    Or get jiggy on a muthafkin boat 
    Yeah the graphics are bad 
    But you'll be glad 
    When you lay down your paper 
    And buy Minecraft now, not later
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    Liam_mk

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    #8  Edited By Liam_mk

    Yo dawg from what i've heard
    Minecraft is more fun than shooting birds 
    Minecraft is the the new thing in town
    from what ive heard
    all the boys in my dorm are downloading it now
    you say the graphiscs are shitty?
    boy you'll forget that in a jiffy
    Cause these blocks are the new shit
    way better than that that dragon age manson bullshit
     
    .....Word

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    BraveToaster

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    #9  Edited By BraveToaster
    @Jack268 said:
    "
    No Caption Provided
    I will never find a more appropriate situation to post this better take the chance when the mods see this they'll be dealing out bans   Also, to answer your question: Minecraft is a game about air and dirt, and fucking redstone - how does that work? "
    That is never appropriate.
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    W0lfbl1tzers

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    #10  Edited By W0lfbl1tzers
    @Axxol said:
    " @Jack268 said:
    "
    No Caption Provided
    I will never find a more appropriate situation to post this better take the chance when the mods see this they'll be dealing out bans   Also, to answer your question: Minecraft is a game about air and dirt, and fucking redstone - how does that work? "
    That is never appropriate. "
    It's always appropriate. 
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    BraveToaster

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    #11  Edited By BraveToaster
    @W0lfbl1tzers said:
    " @Axxol said:
    " @Jack268 said:
    "
    No Caption Provided
    I will never find a more appropriate situation to post this better take the chance when the mods see this they'll be dealing out bans   Also, to answer your question: Minecraft is a game about air and dirt, and fucking redstone - how does that work? "
    That is never appropriate. "
    It's always appropriate.  "
    Let's sword fight over this dispute!
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    deactivated-5fb7c57ae2335

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    @Axxol:  
    Boats and hoes sounds great 
    and gold sounds even better 
    I'm like Biggie Smalls, you'll be hatin'
    On my fuckin' Gucci sweater. 
    So let me lay down my concerns for you acapella 
    I would just buy it right now if I was some other fella 
    Borderlands DLC is calling and it's a loud fucking shout 
    And I like me some Borderlands, so please, hear me out 
    And while Minecraft sounds nice,  
    I've played through BL more than twice 
    And call it nostalgia,  
    But I just want to boost my morale 
    By dementedly, sentimentally killin' robotic entities. 
     
    So answer me this, 
    and please answer me quick. 
    Please once again assure me 
    Minecraft doesn't suck dick.
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    W0lfbl1tzers

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    #13  Edited By W0lfbl1tzers
    @Axxol said:
    " @W0lfbl1tzers said:
    " @Axxol said:
    " @Jack268 said:
    "
    No Caption Provided
    I will never find a more appropriate situation to post this better take the chance when the mods see this they'll be dealing out bans   Also, to answer your question: Minecraft is a game about air and dirt, and fucking redstone - how does that work? "
    That is never appropriate. "
    It's always appropriate.  "
    Let's sword fight over this dispute! "
    You don't want any of my diamond sword.
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    BraveToaster

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    #14  Edited By BraveToaster
    @InfamousBIG:  
     Buy one now, buy the other shit later 
    Their both fairly cheap so it ain't a wallet breaker 
    I like to shoot haters but I also like to build 
    If you're not safe in either, you could get yourself killed 
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    Jack268

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    #15  Edited By Jack268
    @InfamousBIG:  
    just because those claptraps be ridin you dick  
    dont mean you should be buyin their shit 
    cus minecrafts got more heart and brain  
    than those claptraps got cumstains 
     
    and yes, I am the master of rap lyrics.
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    BraveToaster

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    #16  Edited By BraveToaster
    @W0lfbl1tzers said:
    " @Axxol said:
    " @W0lfbl1tzers said:
    " @Axxol said:
    " @Jack268 said:
    "
    No Caption Provided
    I will never find a more appropriate situation to post this better take the chance when the mods see this they'll be dealing out bans   Also, to answer your question: Minecraft is a game about air and dirt, and fucking redstone - how does that work? "
    That is never appropriate. "
    It's always appropriate.  "
    Let's sword fight over this dispute! "
    You don't want any of my diamond sword. "
    Whatever, son. My diamonds got diamonds, that got diamonds.
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    deactivated-5fb7c57ae2335

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    @Axxol:  
    Truly a master of persuasion 
    Even in the strangest situation 
    Claptrap can get smacked high on smack  
    In his ass crack, makin' him fall back 
    To a later date, when I'll degrade and hate on his robot ass, so wait 
    The party is startin' late, thanks for the help, mate  
    So strike a heroic pose 
    And mother fuck prose 
    I'm buyin' this shit 
    Disposition: Case Closed.
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    BraveToaster

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    #18  Edited By BraveToaster

    GB Community Ain't Nothin' To Fuck With

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    jim_dandy

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    #19  Edited By jim_dandy

    Best. Thread. Ever.

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    luce

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    #20  Edited By luce
    @InfamousBIG said:

    " @Axxol:  Truly a master of persuasion Even in the strangest situation Claptrap can get smacked high on smack  In his ass crack, makin' him fall back To a later date, when I'll degrade and hate on his robot ass, so wait The party is startin' late, thanks for the help, mate  So strike a heroic pose And mother fuck prose I'm buyin' this shit Disposition: Case Closed. "


    mic dropped
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    Pinworm45

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    #21  Edited By Pinworm45
    @jim_dandy said:
    " Best. Thread. Ever. "
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    Azteck

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    #22  Edited By Azteck

    I love this thread. You are all gods among men.

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    @Azteck: ...Does that mean I get worshippers?
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    Jack268

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    #24  Edited By Jack268

    man, giantbomb got talent. there should be a freestyle thread in the off topic forum

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    @Azteck:  
    You see, worshippers would be rad, 
    and that could never go bad
    for me, cause, see, I'm the bee's knees and I get higher than a flea 
    Does, when it jumps, and I hump my hoe, as I bump my flow 
    I'll leave you with a lump below, cause I go 
    so hard, and my people never be worshippin' false idols 
    and be sure to cover your face cause I hit harder than Title 
    Bite your fuckin' ear off, but never call me a biter 
    I'm a god, I get women hotter than Ghost Rider 
    So please, just get on your knees, and plea, cause these 
    Motherfuckin' haters are sillier than John Cleese. 
    So just follow me now,  
    and if you're wonderin' how 
    Left click the follow button under my portrait 
    Bow down, how now?
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    CaptainTightPants

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    This thread is the best thread 
    The only bad thing about Minecraft is how dam addicting it is. Graphically I have to say there is just something about it that is very endearing when you look out in the horizon and when you are riding across the water in your boat.  Nighttime can be suspenseful though , once it turns dark you better be inside a house or underground.

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    @Axxol 

     Rap and fap, or I'll tap your knuckles like a nun 
    With Brass Knuckles, *chuckles*, man, wouldn't that be fun 
    Or run and go sun on a nudist beach with a gun 
    And shoot that fag Jack Thompson when you see him, for fun 
    I'm more Verbal than Kint, and and more Space-Age than Kevin 
    I do more damage than a fucking 1911.    


    @CraigAA:  
    You see the problem seems to me 
    That you're a huge pussy 
    So just flee from them damn polygons, and please 
    Don't ever try to watch a David Lynch movie 
    I'm pretty fuckin' sure you'll pee 
    Your pants, and man, Lance Armstrong has more balls than that. 

       Second one is from this thread.
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    Bollard

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    #28  Edited By Bollard
    @InfamousBIG said:
    " @Azteck: ...Does that mean I get worshippers? "
    If he really is Aztec, then hell man, you get SACRIFICES.
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    BraveToaster

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    #29  Edited By BraveToaster

    Oh shit son, it's getting real in this thread. 
     
    Where the fuck is Hams3r at?!?!

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    deactivated-5fb7c57ae2335

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    @Axxol: Rap!  Rap!  Rap!
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    deactivated-5fb7c57ae2335

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    @Chavtheworld said:
    " @InfamousBIG said:
    " @Azteck: ...Does that mean I get worshippers? "
    If he really is Aztec, then hell man, you get SACRIFICES. "
    Those are even better.  Who will be sacrificed first?!
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    BraveToaster

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    #32  Edited By BraveToaster
    @InfamousBIG said:
    " @Axxol: Rap!  Rap!  Rap! "
    I'm running out of lines, but I'll give it a try 
    I fap when I rap, bust a nut in your eye
    The name's Axxol I'm too weird to follow 
    I fuck old ladies cuz they love to swallow 
    My nut sack is fat like Jeffery Gerstmann 
    And my chest is hairy but I ain't no Persian 
    I love to troll the forums of Giant Bomb 
    And I degrade more bitches than the nation of Islam 
    My flow is fuckin' sick like Infamous B-I-G 
    My name ain't Claude, but I love my Weeeeeeeeee
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    joeybagad0nutz

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    #33  Edited By joeybagad0nutz
    @jim_dandy said:
    "Best. Thread. Ever. "
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    deactivated-5fb7c57ae2335

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    @Axxol: 
    You runnin' out of rhymes cause you weak, like Monday 
    I'm gettin' drunk right now, have a hangover on Sunday 
    It's week-end, so I'mma end your weakness 
    If you don't like my rhymes then you can suck my penis 
    My hair is short, but your lifespan is shorter 
    I'm more fucked up than the Mines of Moria! 
    My rap is even doper than the Tiger song 
    Everything up my nose like Cheech and Chong 
    I'm inebriated now, so my rhymes are less lucid 
    But still, when people hear my songs,  
    they say who said that rap ain't music.
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    BraveToaster

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    #35  Edited By BraveToaster
    @InfamousBIG:  
     
    You call those lyrics? I call that shit prattle 
    I didn't want to initiate a freestyle battle 
    Keep talkin shit , I'll stick your face in my poo 
    Put a round between your eyes like you're Noble Two 
    I'm weak from runnin a marathon on your moms and your chick 
    I made a video Two White Hoes, One Black Dick    
    So watch what you say when you talk about me
     
    Cuz I'll shorten your lifespan like APB
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    Vinny_Says

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    #36  Edited By Vinny_Says
    @Axxol said:
    " @InfamousBIG:  
     
    You call those lyrics? I call that shit prattle 
    I didn't want to initiate a freestyle battle 
    Keep talkin shit , I'll stick your face in my poo 
    Put a round between your eyes like you're Noble Two 
    I'm weak from runnin a marathon on your moms and your chick 
    I made a video Two White Hoes, One Black Dick    
    So watch what you say when you talk about me
     Cuz I'll shorten you lifespan like APB "
    AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH SNAP
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    @Axxol:  
    I'm still below the legal limit 
    So no handicap for you 
    Which is too bad,  
    I'll leave you fuckin' black and blue 
    You put spoilers in your rap, but there ain't nothin' to spoil 
    So toil on, I'll foil any coy attempt to royally  
    Whoop my ass, only thing can do that is a Whoopie cushion 
    That shit sounds like your rap, so be fucking careful who you pushin' 
    Mushin' haters like sled dogs, like the beginning of Cryostasis 
    But face it, my rhymes are laced with riffs sicker than Purple Haze 
    So prepare to be amazed, by this lyrical grace 
    So copy and paste, fuckin' biter, prepare to face a fuckin' Ace.
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    BraveToaster

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    #38  Edited By BraveToaster
    @InfamousBIG:  
     
    What a surprise, another rap about you drinkin' 
    Lyrical grace? What the Hell are you thinkin'? 
    Your raps are hella queer like Bruno 
    My rhymes impregnate your girl like Juno  
     I'm a 3DS you're a failure like N-Gage  
    You're a rap squire, I'm a lyrical battle mage 
    I spit hot fire I made the fuckin mic melt 
    You'll need 10 sets of dice to calculate the damage I dealt 
    So give up this battle, I'll let you join my team 
    I've seen better lyrics on a HitmanAgent47 meme
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    meteora

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    #39  Edited By meteora

    We totally need one of these threads in the off-topic discussion.

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    deactivated-5fb7c57ae2335

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    @Axxol:  
      
    Stop trying to save face, or boost your e-penis 
    Lyrical Battle mage?  Over 9,000 is my L33Tness 
    But I do agree with something you said, hey! 
    You are like a 3DS: square and hella gay 
    Reading that Juno line, my face contorted in terror 
    I'm battling a faggot, that line makes you Michael Cera 
    Join your team? You're higher than Cream, livin' in a dream 
    If you seem to think that I'd touch you with a 10 foot beam 
    You're rhymes sound like a queef, more see-through than a leaf  
    So just leave, you don't want to continue this beef.
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    turboman

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    #41  Edited By turboman

    I love this forum.

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    deactivated-5f00787182625

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    Hey guys, I'm way too white to post a rap so I'll just tell you to buy minecraft.

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    MrKlorox

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    #43  Edited By MrKlorox

    Yep. Do it. It's not expensive and even if you're not the type of spend hours mining and stacking blocks, it's $14 USD. It's not like you dropped the full $60 on something you won't play.

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    @W0lfbl1tzers said:
    "

    Just stick it in her pooper

    "
    Just stick it in her pooper, 
     This quote is fuckin' super 
    I give you the thumbs up, like Special Agent Dale Cooper 
    Quote so sick, we're gonna need a bigger boat, Hooper  
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    BraveToaster

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    #45  Edited By BraveToaster
    @InfamousBIG:  
     
    I make bank like Micheal Cera, you struggle for minimum wage 
    My power level's unreadable, somethin' you can't gauge 
    3DS is rectangular, you brain dead cum stain  
    Tell your mom to come over and ride my midnight meat train 
    But imma keep this short, this forum post is dead 
    Let's test our skills in your new Freestyle Thread.
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    robownz7

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    #46  Edited By robownz7

    My brains exploded from reading all of this.
     
    (in a good way.)

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    TheFreeMan

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    #47  Edited By TheFreeMan

    Fuckin' word.

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    Azteck

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    #48  Edited By Azteck
    @InfamousBIG said:
    " @Azteck:  You see, worshippers would be rad, and that could never go badfor me, cause, see, I'm the bee's knees and I get higher than a flea Does, when it jumps, and I hump my hoe, as I bump my flow I'll leave you with a lump below, cause I go so hard, and my people never be worshippin' false idols and be sure to cover your face cause I hit harder than Title Bite your fuckin' ear off, but never call me a biter I'm a god, I get women hotter than Ghost Rider So please, just get on your knees, and plea, cause these Motherfuckin' haters are sillier than John Cleese. So just follow me now,  and if you're wonderin' how Left click the follow button under my portrait Bow down, how now? "
    You got stalked, dawg. PEACE.
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    BraveToaster

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    #49  Edited By BraveToaster
    @zudthespud said:
    " Hey guys, I'm way too white to post a rap so I'll just tell you to buy minecraft. "
    Music is color blind, you ill informed twat 
    Step up to the plate and show us what you got 
    It isn't hard to stick with the rhythm and post a rhyme 
    Sure it may be shitty, but trying isn't a crime 
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    Bollard

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    #50  Edited By Bollard
    @InfamousBIG said:
    " @Chavtheworld said:
    " @InfamousBIG said:
    " @Azteck: ...Does that mean I get worshippers? "
    If he really is Aztec, then hell man, you get SACRIFICES. "
    Those are even better.  Who will be sacrificed first?! "
    Vinny.

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