So, thanks to Ashuku, I scored a free copy of Two Worlds on the PC.

Two Worlds being a terrible Oblivion ripoff. But, believe it or not, I had fun with the Two Worlds Xbox 360 demo - mainly just because it was really easy to goof around. Walk in and try to kill an entire town. Battle against grizzly bears and ghosts.

The full version is no different. Man, hell of a quest that was. I didn't even bother with any of the story stuff, I just said "I wonder what's over here".

Imagine a Bear vs. Zombie vs. Bandit free-for-all.

Eventually I found myself on a beach with some Wyverns that could basically kill me in one hit. However, in the distance, I noticed a tower, so I decided to make my way there, avoiding Undead Bears. Finding some necromancers, I managed to defeat them without breaking a sweat and discovered what seemed to be a dungeon I was supposed to visit at a certain point in the story (but was not ready to be at yet).

I took off again, dodging more undead bears until I encountered giant mantis demons. It was about this time I thought maybe I should turn around and go back. Unfortunately, by now, I was hopelessly lost. I stumbled upon an Orc Warcamp and stole one of their demon horses and just kept ridin'. I rode past the Sand Dragons, the Giant Spiders, the Flesh Golems, and dozens of Orc Warcamps, each with several giant trolls standing guard. All of these being enemies that could kill me in a single hit.

I had no fucking idea where I was.

Eventually I ended up in an evil forest, surrounded by mages with high level fire magic.

Unfortunately, the fact that Two Worlds is a shitty, bug-ridden Oblivion Ripoff finally caught up with it and it became impossible to continue. Still, though. Even if the game is terrible, that was a pretty entertaining way to spend a few hours. Two Worlds could've almost been a good game...