User Reviews
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1 (0)

4.24 stars 4.24/5 Stars Average score of 17 user reviews spread across 0 releases and 0 DLC

Zeke: The Ultimate Predator 0

I played inFamous: Festival of Blood back to back with Assassin's Creed: Revelations, and it made me flip on a very important issue of our times. I now know, as objective truth, that inFamous has better city climbing/traversal mechanics than Assassin's Creed for one important reason: Because bats.  Bats! As part of Festival of Blood you can turn into a swarm of bats and, for a limited time, fly (almost) anywhere you want in the world. Combined with the rail grinding, quick climbing, and Cole's a...

0 out of 0 found this review helpful.

Most Things are Permitted 0

Assassin's Creed: Revelations feels smaller, somehow. You spend most of your time in Istanbul (maiden name: Constantinople) looking for some keys that Altair had hid around town generations earlier. All of the refinements from Brotherhood are here, with you once again recruiting assassins and having them available for quick murder as you climb around town, or you can play the Assassin Tychoon subgame where you send them around Europe and the Middle East to gain experience points for more effecti...

0 out of 0 found this review helpful.

Get a rope 0

Requires Kinect, and some arm strengthThe Gunstringer, and the bundled Fruit Ninja Kinect, are probably the best Kinect games out there. Sadly, that isn't saying that much. Like other Kinect games, the You Are The Controller technology works well enough most of the time, but, particularly in menus, I can't shake the feeling that the whole experience would be better if it were tuned for a standard You Hold The Controller. Once the novelty of waving your arms around wears off, and the shoulder pai...

0 out of 0 found this review helpful.

Often Bet on Duke 0

I can't endorse the, "Always."Duke Nukem Forever is okay. I don't think it deserves the apoplectic hate its receiving from -- well, pretty much everybody that's played it -- but I'm not so forgiving as to flat out call it great. Occasionally fun and funny, is the best I can say about it.You heard me right, funny. I have the heart of a twelve year old (which reminds me, be sure to check the "donate organs" option when you're old enough to get a drivers license). Dukes lines made me laugh most of ...

0 out of 0 found this review helpful.

Hella Rad 0

 The Third Crusade's Kratos God of War took the third person action brawler and made it something new. Dante's Inferno takes God of War and... that's about it. It's not as polished as God of War, the fighting system is simplified, and the setting is roughly based on the Hell envisioned by Dante Alighieri in 1321 rather than roughly based on the entirety of Greek mythology. In spite of the rough patches, and perhaps because of the setting, it was a huge amount of fun.  Written 650 or so years...

0 out of 0 found this review helpful.

Action Tweed! 0

Alan Wake, the game, is amazing. I'm starting to think it's got the best story, and best use of story, in a game since Bioshock. Aside from some truly amazingly bad product placement I've been loving every minute.  The Environment The look is beautiful. There's dense foliage, moody mist, terrific lighting effects as you might expect when the game play focuses so much on the use of light. The art direction and level design are superb. It's linear as all hell, which allows them to pack more things...

0 out of 0 found this review helpful.

Hair Punch! 0

 Leggy Superasskicker Bayonetta, at normal difficulty, is hard as hell. When you're doing poorly, the game's advice to you is to play the game better. Maybe if you hit the correct buttons, you'd have more success. Seems hard to argue the point. This game pulls no punches, but offers some clever upgrades to help you in a pinch. It also offers an "easy" and "very easy" mode, which at certain points in my play through I was pining for. Bayonetta's story, at any difficulty, is totally batshit cr...

2 out of 3 found this review helpful.

Roadie Warrior 0

Brutal Legend is a deeply weird game. Half real time strategy, half open world exploration, and a third half hack and slash action game, you could argue that there's just too much going on for any one game to handle. Then there's the story: you play as Eddie Riggs, superstar roadie to a sell-out pseudo-metal band that would prefer singing about girlfriends over the traditionally important things, like sonically kicking ass. An accident happens, and Eddie is magically transported to the primordia...

1 out of 1 found this review helpful.

'Splosion Man (Secretly) Hates You 0

Doesn't Say Mean Things To Your Face  I had a bad experience with Mega Man 9. I loved Mega Man when I was a kid, but in the intervening years I've gone soft. I don't have the free time I once did, and it seems I've become more emotionally vulnerable. When Mega Man 9 told me, in no uncertain terms, that I was an asshat jerkwad sucktard and then repeatedly kicked me in the nuts, well, I took it personally.Mega Man 9 *hates* me. 'Splosion Man hates me too, but it hid it so well, and was usually s...

0 out of 1 found this review helpful.

I Hate You Mega Man 0

JerkMega Man 9 hates you, and isn't afraid to let you know. Here's news for you Mega Man 9. I hate you back. Please let me have one more E-Tank.It's just as hard as everyone says. Most games of the Mega Man 2 era require memorization, but this game, ostentiably a throw back to MM2, takes it to the next level. We'll give you a blind jump to a landing block that isn't there yet, sure, but this time, let's put it over some spikes.Do you know what else needs some spikes? The ceiling. And another in ...

0 out of 3 found this review helpful.

Dead Space First Place *SPOILERS* 0

Necromorphs. I *hate* those guys.The boss battles look amazing, that much is certain. Fighting the hivemind as it reared it's ugly... head?... a dozen stories into the air while an enormous chunk of the planet burned its way through the atmosphere above made me grin. "Awesome," I said to myself. It was a sight to behold, but I was also grinning because I knew this meant that I was just about done with Dead Space. I was ready for that too. It's a fun game. The "strategic dismemberment" mechanic ...

0 out of 0 found this review helpful.

Political Fallout 0

Fallout 3 is big. Really big. You might think it's a long way to the corner store, but that's peanuts to Fallout. There is much to love in Fallout. The world is big. The density of content is astounding. While it is a wasteland you travel through, you can't go very far without coming across some sort of landmark, mini-quest, or full fledged dungeon. There is just so much to do. So many people to talk to. Even more to shoot. You could spend over a hundred hours questing and not even touch the mai...

0 out of 0 found this review helpful.

Baldr's Floating Gate 0

I bought Too Human for a few reasons. First, there was the game's fearless leader, Dennis Dyack, and his multiple  forum based shenanigans. I found the whole thing endlessly entertaining and want to do my part to support outlandish behavior in the people who make games. Second, I'm a big fan of Norse mythology, and cybernetically tarting the whole thing up appeals to me. Third, I like killing pretend dudes with giant pretend swords. I don't regret my purchase in the least.The game is fun. I enjo...

0 out of 0 found this review helpful.

Size Matters 0

You know, the King of All Cosmos is kind of a dick. He berates you, The Prince, for a few minutes before dropping you off without warning in the most cluttered Japanese restaurant you've ever seen in your life, forces you to roll up all of the knick-knacks scattered about on your "katamari", a roundish, spiky toy that can stick to most everything so long as it's not too big, and then doesn't give you nearly enough time to build up said katamari to his arbitrarily required size.No wonder all of y...

0 out of 0 found this review helpful.

Death from Above 0

The rumors are true. Assassins Creed does indeed get a bit repetitive in its core gameplay mechanics. Before each of the nine major assassinations that Altair is required to perform you must:1) Climb to several high points in the city, and hit a button that forces you to look around at the beautiful     environment.2) Sneak about the alleyways, or climb to the rooftops and run with amazingly fluid animation.3) Eavesdrop on others who often give you helpful and important information about your cu...

0 out of 0 found this review helpful.

Roll for Initiative 0

I can't stand Tycho's writing. He's the literary half of Penny Arcade's Gabe and Tycho team. When it's just him and a block of text I can count on being irritated at least twice, annoyed once, and left with a general feeling that he could have said it all in half the space.However, when his writing is filtered through the three panels of a comic, I love it. Gabe is a great and expressive artist, and when Tycho is forced to cut his thousand words down to twenty, they can frequently be just right....

4 out of 4 found this review helpful.

Bioshocked 0

The failed underwater utopia of  Rapture is the real star of this shooter. The world is beautiful, even after its downfall. As you shoot, zap, freeze, burn, tornado, and bee your way through the leaking hallways and ruined pleasure parks you start to piece together what must have happened. It's a story of idealism broken by corruption. Imperfect men and women try to build a world unfettered by the stogy ethics of the surface world. A closet full of the blood stained dresses of murdered Little Si...

0 out of 0 found this review helpful.