I wish I had any kind of ability to sing:

Put down your remote control

Throw out your TV Guide

Put away your jacket

There's no need to go outside

Don't you know that we control the horizontal

We control the verticle, too

We gonna make a couch potato out of you

That's what we gonna do now

Don't change the channel

Don't touch that dial

We got it all on UPF

Kick off your sneakers

Stick around for a while

We got it all on UPF

Don't worry 'bout your laundry

Forget about your job

Just crank up the volume

And yank off the knob

We got it all, we got it all, we got it all on UPF

Disconnect the phone and leave the dishes in the sink

You better put away your homework

3:30 pm ain't no time to think

All you do is make yourself a TV dinner

Press your face right up against the screen

We gonna show you thangs you ain't ever seen

If you know what I mean, now

Don't change the channel

Don't touch that dial

We got it all on UPF

Kick off your sneakers

Stick around for a while

We got it all on UPF

Don't worry 'bout your laundry

Forget about your job

Just crank up the volume

And yank off the knob

We got it all, we got it all, we got it all on UPF

You can watch us all day

You can watch us all night

You can watch us any time that you please

You can sit around and stare at the LCD

'Till your brain turns into cottage cheese

Well, now

Don't change the channel

Don't touch that dial

We got it all on UPF

Kick off your sneakers

Stick around for a while

We got it all on UPF

Don't worry 'bout your laundry

Forget about your job

Just crank up the volume

And yank off the knob

We got it all, we got it all, we got it all on UPF

We got it all on UPF (UPF)

We got it all on UPF (UPF)

We got it all on UPF (UPF)

We got it all on UPF (we got it all)

We got it all on UPF (UPF)

We got it all on UPF (UPF)

We got it all on UPF (UPF)

We got it all on UPF (we got it all)

We got it all (we got it all) on UPF (we got it)

(We got it) we got (we got it) it all (we got it) on UPF (we got it all)

We got it all on UPF (we got it all)

We got it all on UPF (UPF)

We got it all (we got it all) on UPF (on UPF)

We got it all on UPF

We got it all on UPF (UPF)

We got it all (we got it all) on UPF (we go it)

We got it all on UPF

We got it all on UPF

We got it all on UPF

We got it all on UPF (UPF)

We got it all on UPF (UPF)

We got it all on UPF