OFFICIAL GS O T Y: TWO THOUSAND EIGHT TEEN

THE DIFINITIVE GOATEES

List items

  • beat takeshi throws a baby like a football. Kiryu gets dragged back into this shit one last fucking time. the new engine is a little rough but goddamn if you're into the yakuza series and you don't play this what the FUCK is wrong with you. Kiryu raps so it's #1 for this year:

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=klfOoPEISyQ

  • 2018's 2017 game of the year.

    listen: i didnt get a switch until this year and it would be criminal negligence to not put this on this year since i didnt play it last year. this is probably top 5 games of all time imo and it perfectly straddles the line between weird intricate systems that let you feel like you're breaking the game and being polished enough that the game isn't straight up broken if you do dumb shit. i've never played a game where wondering if some stupid shit you could do was possible and not only is it, but the game is cool with you doing it.

  • look bitch: i played the demo and i couldn't afford the new version this year but its tetris, they didn't fuck it up, and the music is good. if i had bought it it would probably be #1 but blame my boss for not paying me more.

  • I got this on December 26th and I am both disappointed that i did not play it earlier but also glad that I waited until i had a ton of time off because i am going to sink my teeth into this so hard. goddamn even the first 5 minuts just ooze syle and polish in every way, lucas pope is a wizard.

  • games not out but it's one of 8 games i played this year that actually came out this year and aren't actively bad (smash is only passively bad)

    update: its out and its actually good, holy shit!!! the world of light mode is really good for someone like me who just wants to fight rando dudes, and the spirits are good for like quick fights with fun conditions! I will never play it online!

  • im writing this after having only done a couple missions because i'm balls deep in grad school and should be writing a paper instead but it's good and swinging is real satisfying. expect it to be a contender for 2019's 2018 goatee (that will probably be tetris effect tho lets be real).

  • i played two mobile games that came out this year: a big budget nintendo/whoever release and some shitty f2p konami thing. surprise: not only did konami release a video game, it's good as hell. turns out, if you make a simple puzzle game that draws on decades of cool-ass pixel art for inspiration and you can play offline, it's good. I played dragalia lost twice before i stopped because it doesn't fucking work offline but I've played this so much that its literally burned in to my phone screen. fucking KONAMI is on my goty list in 2018, isnt that fucked up.

  • if youd have told me like 8 years ago there would be a monhun game i'd buy twice and enjoy the hell out of i'd call you something incredibly ableist and then make some stupid homophobic comment because goddamn i was a shit back then but hey: future me knows better both in that you should respect other fucking people and that sometimes you want a game that's grindy but challenging. they removed the stuff that really turned me off monhun and added a lot of quality of life shit and it's really good!!! even if id have played a ton of shit this year, it would still probably be #5 because it's pretty darn good!

  • forsaken hit this year so it gets to go on this list. its a surprisingly solid shootman loot game and i wish the story was in any way compelling to me but it filled the void left when i needed something mindless to grind on for a bit. i dont have a crew to play with so its not like im doing raids or anything because thats way too much fucking effort for my casual ass

  • this killed a bunch of time for me when i was watching my fiancee play botw and just generally procrastinating. it's a lot better than it has any right to be but it's not the best mobile game i played this year.

  • STILL THE BEST 1997