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DrLariat

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10 Video Games in 2013 in order from best to last. (and 2 "honorable" mentions)

Wow, going back and looking at/making this list, 2013 fucking suuuuucked. We got a new GTA and new systems to play with and my response to all of it is, "ehh, theyre ok." The only positive surprise was the numba 1 game. I expected that game to be a cheap cash in on some unfinished content and ended up with an amazing game. The rest are a bunch of games that were supposed to be awesome but weren't, or games that started out awesome and then got old after a week or two.

What an odd year of games, I can't tell if games got kinda crappy this year, or if I am just starting to not give a shit about games anymore. It's this weird thing I've had lately where I get more enjoyment hearing about and the things that go on and around games, the crazy business of it all (This year's E3 was fucking absurd and awesome) than actually playing the games themselves. I rarely buy new games at full price anymore. knowing full well that there is a good possibility that after a week and 25% of a game played, I may put it on the shelf and go back to grinding space dollars in STO. I may have sabotaged myself a bit here though, I was thoroughly hyped for the newness of the PS4, when I got home I installed it in a common room so it has never been allowed to get it's claws into me.

Anyhow, on with the list.

List items

  • Holy shit, they made a really awesome Crackdown 2 and it ended up being a Saints Row game. It's the best Matrix game ever made AND a sequel to Crackdown AND a sequel to Saints Row 3! That is a pretty amazing and tall order and somehow Volition put it all together. I saw people complain that due to the super powers and run speed that cars took a real backseat in this game. I can't hear those people because I'm too busy jumping over a building dragging a ufo behind me that I've grasped WITH THE POWER OF MY MIND, all with a soundtrack of catchy as hell electronic music or classical depending on your interests.

    I can't say enough good things about the soundtrack for this game aside from the note that I'm sure my roommates hate every song because it's all I listen to as a playlist on spotifiy and I don't think any of emm like techno.

  • Driving around in GTA V is mind blowing. Rockstar's abilities to create virtual cities has always astounded me, it's all the details, traffic lights cycle, life goes on around you, people answer phones and walk and talk and then stop and call the police because you just shot a jogger.

    Like every GTA before it, I played up to around 35% in and then spent the next two weeks fucking around in the virtual world, making up new games as I go like "Pirate" (Find a boat, you are now a pirate, drive boat on to landlubber shore and start a firefight, don't leave the boat, you're a pirate after all) I am quite sure that at some point (around the PC release perhaps) I will go back and finish the game, I always come back around to a GTA game.

    Why isn't this number 1? The damn online. It's close to awesome, I really want to like it, but it all feels so slap dash, you can't be a cop. That's just silly.

  • I am thoroughly enjoying my new virtual career of "Surface to Air missile specialist." Ya know what the problem with most multiplayer FPS games? Your guns don't lock on to track targets, hell, they aren't even fly by wire. Battlefield 4 fixes this by letting you be terrible at shooting a running man but excel in other ares like keeping big slow moving transport helicopters out of the sky.

    Finally getting a home version with the full PC treatment is really great. I remember getting to play Battlefield 2 on the first Xbox, "24 players? This aint Battlefield." Shit has finally caught up and I can enjoy a nice looking version of Battlefield with all 64 players and not have to worry about my PC melting as a result.

  • This counts because in 2013 they put out the first expansion, Legacy of Romulus. It added playable Romulans and a shit ton of Romulan ships, more shit to do, the usual MMO expansion. Also I still play this as much as all the other games combined so it goes in the list.

  • This game is sometimes really fun. The key is to pretend the half assed online integration doesn't exist. Don't bother worrying about racing with other players cause that shit ain't likely to happen, maybe if you're lucky you will have another player zip past, going the other direction at high speed never to be seen again.

    Lame always on-online aside its a damn fun racing game with some new double or nothing mechanics for progression that add a new thing to racing games. It looks nice on the new consoles and controls about as well as Need For Speed: Hot Pursuit, the last good arcade racing game to have been released. No seriously, I tried most games in between both NFS and other franchises, they've all kinda sucked after Hot Pursuit.

  • Man, that was a really great hour or so I got to spend walking around and checking out the fantastical world of Columbia. It was a not quite steampunk thing mixed with early 1900's Americana kitsch. I heavily enjoyed seeing this imaginative new world, being able to stroll through it at my leisure.

    Then some shit went down and I had to shoot a bunch of guys, then I had to shoot more guys to move forward a bit more and after 15 minutes of that I turned the game off and haven't been back since. Someday I'll play more. It's what I was saying in the intro about not liking games anymore, I liked the story stuff and hated the part where I had to play it.

  • It's like Diablo but with Captain America who is way cooler than the elf or gandolf or whateverthefuck you are in Diablo. The developers have been adding crazy amounts of improvements and upgrades, re-writing entire character's abilities and busting their ass to make what launched as an okay game, good.

    And it's free. I spent a bit too much on fancy costumes for my X mans but a normal, healthy person could totally get some fun out of this for free.

  • What a fun hour and a half, this one has Brock Samson! At about the 2 hour mark you are starting to hear lines and jokes repeated, and you've played enough poker for a year and you're done. Which is okay cause these games are like $2.49 on sale, you've probably spent more than that on a giant redbull you let get warm when you passed out, or 6x that amount on a shitty beer at an outdoor concert that got spilled all over your pants when a drunk burnout crashed into you.

  • More Starcraft came out, the dumb story got dumber, there were some units added. I guess.

    I was really excited for the next part when Starcraft 2:Part 1 came out like 3 years ago, then it took them 3 years and I stopped caring somewhere around year 2. Is StarCraft 2: Part 3 even coming out? I don't really care anymore.

  • I played this a bit more than FIFA 13 so it gets number 10. Also it has a dog and you can be the dog. You've seen the pictures by now, dog looks adorable in it's tactical getup. doggiedoggiesoggiedoggiedoggie

  • HONORABLE MENTION 1:GAME I DIDN'T ACTUALLY PLAY BUT WATCHED ON YOUTUBE AND WAS AWESOME.

    There's a ps3 in the common room but I would have gotten to play like an hour of Last of Us before I had to go to bed, never finishing due to the constant stream of Netflix/GTA pumped into that TV by my roommates. I watched a 6 hour youtube of all the story bits and enough gameplay to give context and I was fucking riveted. There arent enough morose sci fi having big investor money projects out there, morose doesn't sell soft drinks. The Last of US leaves you the way all good sci fi should, feeling empty and detached.

  • FUCK YOU YOU HAD LIKE 10 YEARS WHAT THE FUCK!!!?!?!?!?!? GAME OF THE YEAR

    WHAT THE FUCK MAXIS? YOU HAD TEN GODDAMN YEARS TO FIX THE TRAFFIC BUGS IN SIMCITY 4, BRING THE GRAPHICS UP TO MODERN PAR AND FUCKING DONE. EASY MOTHER FUCKING PEEZY BUT NO YOU HAD TO GET ALL FANCY AND ADD A WONKY AGENTS SYSTEM THAT DEOSNT WORK AND AN ALWAYS ON-ONLINE THAT DOESNT FUCKING WORK AND AGGGHHHH

    EVERY DAY THE PEOPLE IN YOUR SIMMED TOWN WORK AT A NEW JOB WHATEVER IS CLOSEST TO "THEIR HOUSE" WITH OPENINGS. THEN AT THE END OF THE WORK DAY THEY GO "HOME" TO WHICHEVER RESIDENTIAL STRUCTURE IS CLOSEST AND HAS OPENINGS. THE AGENT SYSTEM!

    THIS ISNT HOW CITIES WORK EA AND MAXIS YOU STUPID FUCKS!

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