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fobwashed

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I miss Ryan Davis

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Truth time. As crazy into the gaming culture as I am, nobody else around me is. That being the case, the Giant Bomb crew and this community here is my primary outlet for all things gaming. Nobody gets references to things like Itagaki and his damn shades, how crazy it is that one of the Bioware doctors is on a global beer quest or that Reggie's body is ready but I love that shit. You know who else loves that shit? You guys and gals and even more so, the bomb crew.

Watching quick looks and listening to bombcasts over the years, I've grown close to these guys and have a sort of one-way friendship with them all (as many of us do). They don't know me, but I feel like I know them. . . which sounds super weird to write. If you take into account the various side projects I've done where they were the focus, you'd think I was some sorta creepy stalker. . . Hell, I've even sent them a care package once from Korea and it was opened on a mailbag and that they got some measure of enjoyment was eerily life affirming.

I fucking miss Ryan Davis. It's goddamn crazy. I didn't realize how huge an impact he had on my life until now and it's freaking insane. Even though I only knew him through a very tiny window, he was such an amazing person that it was all he needed to impact me in a huge way. I can only imagine what those who were actually close to him must be feeling. I hope that his family and friends can find some comfort in knowing that we, all of us out on the other side of the window, intimately understand how amazing this gentleman was, and how huge a loss it is for him to be gone.

Much love to all.

46 Comments

46 Comments

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Mushir

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Edited By Mushir

That image is amazing.

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mrfluke

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@fobwashed: glad you made a post about your amazing artwork, i was just about to do it for you and fully credit you for it.

mind tagging your blog post to the ryan davis page? you can do it using full edit

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I_Stay_Puft

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Edited By I_Stay_Puft

Well said dude.

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probablytuna

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I still cannot believe that he's gone....

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mikethekilla

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After the second day it's really hitting me.

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Sploder

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Oh man, that pic of the empty mic stand and headphones... :,(

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MariachiMacabre

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I've seen this (fantastic) image 3 times now. That last one gets me everytime. Well done.

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fobwashed

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@mushir said:

That image is amazing.

Thanks duder.

@mrfluke said:

@fobwashed: glad you made a post about your amazing artwork, i was just about to do it for you and fully credit you for it.

mind tagging your blog post to the ryan davis page? you can do it using full edit

I've tried but I can't seem to get it to stick -_-;;

I still cannot believe that he's gone....

Me neither. I still cling to the idea that this is just some terrible joke. But it ain't =(

@sploder said:

Oh man, that pic of the empty mic stand and headphones... :,(

I feel like the next bombcast is when it'll really hit home hard.

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chaser324

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chaser324  Moderator

@fobwashed said:

Truth time. As crazy into the gaming culture as I am, nobody else around me is.

Same here. Video games have been and continue to be a major influence in my life, and yet, for the longest time I had no outlet for expressing my love for the medium. GB is pretty much the one place that I've ever felt comfortable indulging my passion for gaming, and that's a big reason why I think the connection with Ryan and the rest of the staff feels so personal.

We lost a real friend.

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fisk0

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fisk0  Moderator

@fobwashed said:

Truth time. As crazy into the gaming culture as I am, nobody else around me is.

Same here. Video games have been and continue to be a major influence in my life, and yet, for the longest time I had no outlet for expressing my love for the medium. GB is pretty much the one place that I've ever felt comfortable indulging my passion for gaming, and that's a big reason why I think the connection with Ryan and the rest of the staff feels so personal.

We lost a real friend.

Same here, nobody else in my family has any interest in games beyond stuff like Wordfeud, a few of my co-workers do, but seemingly more in the "seen the latest Call of Duty/FIFA/Madden?" way. I pretty much don't talk to any of my offline acquaintances about games. How to behave when shit like this happens is beyond me, and for me it's not even the first time it's happened, two people I used to talk to quite a lot with online died in the past 7 years, and I really couldn't figure out how to talk to anybody about that either.

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turboman

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Very nice/beautiful image.

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Milkman

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That picture is heartbreakingly beautiful. He would have loved it. Thank you.

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ShaggE

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Shit, that picture got the tears going again.

I'm the same way, in that it seems like there's nobody in a 500 mile radius that gives a damn about games in the way we do. I'm sure there are plenty, obviously, but I certainly can't find them. And the friends that ARE deep into games don't come to Giant Bomb or know what a Ryan Davis even is.

Thankfully these forums are making up for the lack of real world avenues of expression. You guys have been awesome, coming together like this, and I'm proud to be a part of it. I just wish this vibe of togetherness could have been for a happier reason.

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sharpcypher

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What a fantastic tribute. Your message says exactly how I feel, too. Thanks.

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nights

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God damn it, I have to stop coming to this site for a few days. It's too taxing on my soul.

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Osaladin

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Just when I got a handle on my emotions. Amazing artwork man.

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MildMolasses

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Edited By MildMolasses

@sploder said:

Oh man, that pic of the empty mic stand and headphones... :,(

I saw this on twitter and that was the one thing that brought me closest to tears

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TheManWithNoPlan

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Really nice duder. Wonderful tribute.

I'm broken up inside.

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Nzwei

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Insane art... so awesome, and somehow sad as f***. 5 stars.

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daddy_gab

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F*ckin awesome art man. That empty mic and headphones got to me...

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ArtisanBreads

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Edited By ArtisanBreads

Love your art, but also your post man because it totally echos my situation. I'm a big nerd and basically none of my friends are (they play Madden, CoD, maybe another game or two and that's it at the most).

For me, the Giant Bomb dudes have become a place to flock for that shared gaming talk and more than that, there's a personal, humor, etc connection since Gamespot. What they have done with this site is not only just great in its own right, it's inspiring to me.

The internet is bringing people together in new ways. That's all you can say. I've now read, again and again, posts that echo my own, about how someone you never met passing away could really hurt this much and leave that much of an impact. We are here together, all missing this great guy. That's just how it is, the medium brought us together to find Ryan and now to grieve without him.

@fisk0 said:

@chaser324 said:

@fobwashed said:

Truth time. As crazy into the gaming culture as I am, nobody else around me is.

Same here. Video games have been and continue to be a major influence in my life, and yet, for the longest time I had no outlet for expressing my love for the medium. GB is pretty much the one place that I've ever felt comfortable indulging my passion for gaming, and that's a big reason why I think the connection with Ryan and the rest of the staff feels so personal.

We lost a real friend.

Same here, nobody else in my family has any interest in games beyond stuff like Wordfeud, a few of my co-workers do, but seemingly more in the "seen the latest Call of Duty/FIFA/Madden?" way. I pretty much don't talk to any of my offline acquaintances about games. How to behave when shit like this happens is beyond me, and for me it's not even the first time it's happened, two people I used to talk to quite a lot with online died in the past 7 years, and I really couldn't figure out how to talk to anybody about that either.

Missed your posts on the first read... see here it is again. I'm with you guys. We lost a real friend.

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vaiz

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Edited By vaiz

Man. I was bummed but not teary eyed bummed for the last two days, but the empty mic and headphones at the end of that picture...

Man...

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mracoon

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That is fantastic picture, it nearly brought me to tears.

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Ontheocho

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You're a talented gentleman, and you captured how I feel in what you said and eerily spot on in your incredible art. I got teary twice. Once when Ryan's dad posted pictures of him as a toddler on Twitter and your artistic tribute. Your picture captures much more than a thousand words.

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wmoyer83

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Edited By wmoyer83

The lonely mic and head phones :_(

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reisz

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fobwashed

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Edited By fobwashed

@wmoyer83: @ontheocho: @mracoon: @punkxblaze: @nzwei: @daddy_gab: @themanwithnoplan: @mildmolasses: @osaladin: @milkman: @turboman: Thanks duders. I've been trying to put into words how I felt since I heard the news yesterday and today I just gave up and picked up the stylus. After drawing, I felt the words came much easier. I don't want to be inclusive, but I think that anyone that's "one of us" can look at this picture and just be able to understand how crazy awesome Ryan Davis was and just how goddamn much we're gonna miss him.

@artisanbreads: @fisk0: @chaser324: It's nice to be understood -__-

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TheHT

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Amazing picture duder. Reminds me of how awesome this road has been.

Not nearly long enough though.

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godlyone

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Fantastic art as always, Fobwashed. Wedding outfit Ryan and the empty microphone killed me...

It's stuff like this that comes out of the community that no doubt had Ryan proud of what he helped build. As blonde Ryan is an example of, Ryan was unapologetically himself and that's what made so many gravitate towards him.

As someone who, at this point, see and hear Ryan along with the rest of the crew for hours on hours a week, it's still a tough thing to accept that Ryan won't be there anymore on the host chair or infectiously laughing out of my headphones.

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Snail

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That image is a great tribute. Well done Fobwashed.

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fishmicmuffin

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Great post. I'm so sad :(

@godlyone said:

Fantastic art as always, Fobwashed. Wedding outfit Ryan and the empty microphone killed me...

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aleryn

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Great art and count me as another one you got with the last sprite. Thank you.

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GaspoweR

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Same here. I know friends who are into games but they are not GB fans and thus it's kinda weird going through the motions these past two days and not be able to openly express what I feel deep down. I wish to be able to see all you duders as well as the crew some time down the road but I never ever imagined it was going to happen without Ryan.

Amazing art, sir. That 2nd to the last Ryan (with his wedding attire) really hit me hard.

Man...I wish I haven't looked at that art now since I'm tearing up again. Thank you for this.

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Echoes83

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Edited By Echoes83

That last one is, Christ all mighty. Who would've thought a couple dozen pixels could be so moving.

Good bye Mr. Davis, you are an inspiration to us all.

I can't stop crying.

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rollingzeppelin

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@wmoyer83: @ontheocho: @mracoon: @punkxblaze: @nzwei: @daddy_gab: @themanwithnoplan: @mildmolasses: @osaladin: @milkman: @turboman: Thanks duders. I've been trying to put into words how I felt since I heard the news yesterday and today I just gave up and picked up the stylus. After drawing, I felt the words came much easier. I don't want to be inclusive, but I think that anyone that's "one of us" can look at this picture and just be able to understand how crazy awesome Ryan Davis was and just how goddamn much we're gonna miss him.

@artisanbreads: @fisk0: @chaser324: It's nice to be understood -__-

I can't believe how much I miss him, I am only realising now how much of a role model he was in my life. So much of my personality has been shaped by Ryan and the rest of the crew, I'm 24 now and I've been avid fans of theirs since before highschool.

I've bawled my eyes out four times today. Before yesterday, I hadn't shed a single tear in the last decade. This is the most heart wrenching thing I've ever experienced.

I hope the rest of the guys have had time to process everything, it must be devastating for them.

Thank you Ryan, for being such a huge, positive force in my life. You are sorely missed.

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joshthebear

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Man, that empty headphones and microphone stand at the end hit a little too hard.

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TheHBK

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I guess I am in a less lonely position, where my brother and I like to talk about the antics of the guys on GB. He was shocked by the passing of Ryan. He has brought us so many laughs. And so many thoughts have filled my head in the last 24 hours since it has sunk in. He is not gonna be around for the launch of the new consoles. Just last week, listening to the bombcast on Wednesday, when he died, I thought, man, this podcast seems a little empty, hope Ryan doesn't take a 2 week honeymoon or something. Ugh.

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FlipperDesert

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God damn it, that microphone.

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Rowz

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@fobwashed: That image is ridiculously powerful, great work duder. This post pretty closely mirrors how I'm feeling and my relationship to gaming culture.

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NemeanOtter

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That picture is fantastic. I can't stop staring and I can't stop crying.

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fobwashed

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@dutchmeat: @rowz: @flipperdesert: @joshthebear: @echoes83: @gaspower: @aleryn: @fishmicmuffin: @snail: Thanks duders. I didn't mean to cause anyone to get sad, but I guess you can't really separate missing someone with being sad that they're gone =(

@theht said:

Amazing picture duder. Reminds me of how awesome this road has been.

Not nearly long enough though.

thx, and ain't that the damn truth =(

@godlyone said:

Fantastic art as always, Fobwashed. Wedding outfit Ryan and the empty microphone killed me...

It's stuff like this that comes out of the community that no doubt had Ryan proud of what he helped build. As blonde Ryan is an example of, Ryan was unapologetically himself and that's what made so many gravitate towards him.

As someone who, at this point, see and hear Ryan along with the rest of the crew for hours on hours a week, it's still a tough thing to accept that Ryan won't be there anymore on the host chair or infectiously laughing out of my headphones.

I don't know about other community members, but I've always done community related stuff because these guys give me so much joy that I feel like I need to give back. A membership ain't nearly enough imo. I know they've seen some of my stuff and I hope that they know they're doin good by inspiring nuts like us to do what we do.

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Tireyo

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Very nice tribute indeed.

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zero_

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Edited By zero_

Love the new pixel art.

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Deusoma

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@fobwashed: I know exactly what you mean by the one-way friendship thing. He was someone who brought joy to our lives and made it easier to get through the hard times. I think he would have been delighted by your pixel tribute.

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Lanechanger

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Edited By Lanechanger

"I fucking miss Ryan Davis. It's goddamn crazy. I didn't realize how huge an impact he had on my life until now and it's freaking insane"

God this line resonated so well and kills me.

@fobwashed said:

@wmoyer83: @ontheocho: @mracoon: @punkxblaze: @nzwei: @daddy_gab: @themanwithnoplan: @mildmolasses: @osaladin: @milkman: @turboman: Thanks duders. I've been trying to put into words how I felt since I heard the news yesterday and today I just gave up and picked up the stylus. After drawing, I felt the words came much easier. I don't want to be inclusive, but I think that anyone that's "one of us" can look at this picture and just be able to understand how crazy awesome Ryan Davis was and just how goddamn much we're gonna miss him.

@artisanbreads: @fisk0: @chaser324: It's nice to be understood -__-

I can't believe how much I miss him, I am only realising now how much of a role model he was in my life. So much of my personality has been shaped by Ryan and the rest of the crew, I'm 24 now and I've been avid fans of theirs since before highschool.

I've bawled my eyes out four times today. Before yesterday, I hadn't shed a single tear in the last decade. This is the most heart wrenching thing I've ever experienced.

I hope the rest of the guys have had time to process everything, it must be devastating for them.

Thank you Ryan, for being such a huge, positive force in my life. You are sorely missed.

Yeah I'm with you dude. I've had a vvvvery vvvery distant member of my family that I've met as a kid like once died recently and I just shrugged it off as if nothing happened. But Ryan's death has been hitting me pretty hard, I haven't bawled and gotten choked up like this in a long time. Ryan Davis has expanded my vocabulary, made me a funnier person and has inspired me to do more dumb things than I would have otherwise.

Thanks Ryan, everytime I learn a fancy new word I'll think of you, everytime I pull off a quick-witted quip I'll think of you, everytime I do something dumb I'll think of you. You have become a part of me and will never be forgotten.

Rest easy duder.

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teov

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This still bums me out... I couldn't believe I'd care so much about someone I haven't met, and never would have met (since I live in Eastern Europe)... I miss Ryan. I still wish that this is a sick joke, and that he'll come back and host the Bombcast as if nothing happened.

And yeah. amazing art!