I've just returned from China with a degree in marketing management. So after years of essentially drinking and the occasional reading, it hit me: Shit just got real.
Sorry, I had to. I'm a sucker for anything where the joke is in the use of words. I need to find a job. After two weeks of applying I've realized that most companies out there wouldn't recognize a talent if it sat on their face. I mean come on, sometimes I think my resume makes me look over qualified:
Job objective: Make enough money for a place to live, and some food until I have enough experience to get a better job with better pay.
Skills: None that makes me stand out from the crowd, because I have no marketing experience except the shaping of my online dating profile, but I can't say that was a huge success, I'm still single and my life is miserable.
Experience: Burger flipping.
Education: Kind of relying on the fact that I studied in China. Is that interesting? No? Come on 我会说汉语
Haha oh look, another freshly graduated idiot! We're so much better than him! But I'm starting to realize that I need to start somewhere really low. I do not have experience, I do not have any particular skills, but damnit I have potential. The job market in the video game industry is really tight, so there's NO WAY that I can start there. So here's my strategy: Hopefully I'll land an entry level job in advertisement selling. From there I'll network with people, and ofcourse gain an understanding on how advertisements are sold and so on. The hard part will be to prove my worth, so I need to practise my presentation skills. After a year or two I'm moving on to something somewhat bigger. I'll probably have to work as a seller a bit more before I can land the kind of job that is fun in marketing. To take part in decisions that affect how to shape the marketing to fit with the strategy of the company and reach the visions and so on.
From there on out IT IS ON. Before you know it I'm managing in a respected marketing firm, and when there's an opening for a marketer in the video games industry then BAM.
---Product manager ------Senior product manager ---------Associate General Manager ------------General Manager ---------------Director ------------------C mother E fucking O
(•_•)
( •_•)>⌐■-■
(⌐■_■)
Look out Kotick. Enjoy it while it lasts.
And now I am going to call a potential employer. Wish me luck.
Also, I asked this in the beginning but are there others out there applying for jobs? Is it hard to find anything on your profession?
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As a security guard at an airport I meet a lot of people that are more interesting than me. That said, if I ever were to move outside my home other for work I would probably meet people more interesting than me everywhere, but I digress. So, over the last two years of working every other weekend I have making uncomfortable situations for a couple of celebrities by explaining to them why they are doing it wrong. So I'm putting up a quick list of some of them. I'm going to start with today's encounter.
Ahh, some low life security guard got your ass now. Whatcha gon do?
He just made a local live performance, and apparently doesn't own a private jet. So he had to pass through my domain. I was hoping it was the bribe when one of his security guards pulled out a PHAT roll of dollar bills, but alas. Reminds me of a story my coworkers told me about when Snoop Dogg came through the security checkpoint, and filled a whole basket with money. What the hell. Funny story: One of the guys at work saw Fast and Furious 5 yesterday, and didn't sleep last night so he thought he was hallucinating for a moment.
Robyn I don't know how known she is world wide, but in Scandinavia she's pretty huge. A song to.. maybe.. jog your memory. Man, she does NOT look the same without make up. But I have to hand it to her, few celebrities would show in public without make up. That means men as well.
Either that or she had some on, and uses a fucking lot on shows and music videos.
Motörhead
This is about a year ago, when they had played at a local festival. I had to stop them because they went the wrong way, into international zone when they were flying domestic. It feels wrong to tell this kind of greatness what to do. Atleast I got a story out of it.
Kvelertak
I've met them on a couple of occasions but also at work. You probably haven't heard of them, but here's a song. Great song, great band.
One of the party members turns out to have been in a crystal form
It's like... I dunno. Have you seen 2001: A space odyssey? It starts with a bunch of monkeys fighting over some waterhole... and you just wait for whatever to happen. It's kind of boring and gets better and better by the hour (see what I did there). Later you're in space with HAL, and later you travel through the dimensions, ending up in some room, blowing your godamn mind. Ofcourse I'm not saying that it's as good as 2001, as it is my favorite movie of all time. But I have to admit, that the beginning of both was pretty boring.... but got better. I mean: I HATED FF13 to begin with. 2001 got absolutely amazing, cannot be compared, BUT FF13 got pretty good aswell. I have not finished it yet, but it gets better and better:)
That said, I had played the game for 10 hours before I started to like it. So it takes a lot of patience. But I recommend it :)
PS: I have been planning to write this blog all day, and have had a couple of beers when I decided to finally write it, so I'm kinda intoxicated. I appologize for the possible typos etc.
I just started Final Fantasy 13 for the first time today, and I never thought I'd say this about a game, but there are too damn many cutscenes. I figured the hour long intro was Square Enix being ambitious about its game. I accepted it, and got excited when I finally could start interracting with this video game. "Let's get it ON!" I thought to myself, ready to embark on another epic Final Fantasy journey, only to take five steps, and to encounter yet another cutscene. "Allright" I thought, disappointed and somewhat confused.
30 minutes later I could yet again interact. I fought off a couple of mobs, and was rewarded with one more episode of season one. Although, I started to feel more punished than anything else. History repeated itself as I fought off mobs, and was forced to watch more cutscenes. At this point my roommate asked "can't you just skip it" on which I replied "I wish I could *sigh*, but I have to understand the story." After a while I finally got into an area with lots of mobs to kill, and with that the chance to explore the combat system. I also remembered from previous FF games that it could be a good idea to grind XP for future fights. I could take a left to continue the story, but I turned right to take a detour through the mob infested path. So I grinded for a good while only to find out I am not far enough into the game yet to get experience points.
I've been playing for three hours.
Jesus. Mary. And Joseph.
In all fairness, I guess it should be mentioned that I have not really been playing for three hours... take away all the cutscenes, and I guess I've only been in game... wow, this is a perfect opportunity to make my point and say something like five minutes, but I'm gonna be realistic and say 30 minutes, because that fact makes an even bigger impact. So much wasted time! All the time that could have been used to study! ... ah. Who am I kidding... IT'S BORING!
I will play through it though. *Sigh* .... wish me luck.
I'm not sure if this breaks any rules. I don't think so as this is a part of an assignment at school, and not for commercial use.
I study international marketing management at the Norwegian school of business. I'm at my second year, and in the statistics class we must create a survey, get data, and analyze it. We just need a couple of more answers, and if any of you could help me and my group out that would be great :) (People are MEAN out there. "Hey could you please answer this-" "FUCK OFF!" oO).
It's in Norwegian, but I recon you Danish and Swedish people understand it.
It concerns frozen pizza.
It would be GREATLY appreciated. I will follow anyone who answers it:)
Man, did I feel like a bad ass. I was like a spy in the movies, because of what I did. Recon, intel acquisition, espionage... call it what you will. Bottom line is that from this day on, I am special ops. My job is the best.
All stories needs alternative titles.
Ok, so I work at the local airport as a security guard. I meet at 6 in the morning, make sure people don't bring their precious soap into the planes, get 10 minutes coffee breaks every hour and go home. I know, it sounds awesome. But today it got even better :D I went in the security control when my boss said to me "get a walkie" I was like "sir?" and then he commanded me "THAT WAS AN ORDER!" then I firmly said "SIR!" and ran off to get a walkie. When I got back he told me that we got a situation. Some weirdo with MUSICAL INSTRUMENTS went through. And even more: His hair was... CURLY. He probably even smelled bad too.
SUSPICIOUS ACTIVITY
Maracas and curly hair? Clearly this man is up to no good. After a brief description of who the man was, I went off. Into the wilderness of the public airport. Where liquid containers over 100 ml are priced higher than gold, and the only place where you can see whole families running like their lives were depending on it. Liftoff deadlines is not a joking matter.
I have watched a lot of Burn Notice, as well as James Bond movies and others in the genre. So I knew that I could not act all cool, showing people that I am currently looking for a tall male in his thirties. I needed to blend with the enviroment. Spy style. Although, it suddenly occured to me that I was in uniform. And every person in there was looking at me, wondering what I was doing. "Curses!" I cried out.
But I'm smart. I didn't let that stop me. Ofcourse, I cannot let this blow my cover, so I pretended I was on break. Checking out the scenery. Stating how fine the weather was today to random bypassers. Some smiled and confirmed, others stated that we were inside, and some looked at me wondering what the fuck I was trying to do. Cover blown. Shit. I realized that this was not common behaviour for security guard. So I needed a plan C. Luckily, I am a born natural, so that I knew that I had to improvise.
I needed to act like security guards do. Do what we normally do when we're keeping order. The only thing I COULD do not to stand out of the crowd: Nothing. Or more specifically, it had to look like, I was trying to look like I was working, when I am actually not doing a thing. In short: "Look busy, the boss is coming." So I ventured on, like a security guard would, trying to find a jew who is fond of african music.
Sadly this story has a rather anti climactic ending. I did not find the guy. A true escape artist! My boss was probably talking too loud, so that the bugs he planted caught our conversation, and split. Atleast I diverted a possible terrorist act.
2010 is not over yet, but already some good music has been exposed to the open public. I'm not the kind of guy that listens to the most popular music out there. Since you're asking, it's because I hear it all the time on the radio, when I'm out drinking, and at parties... I'm fed up by Lady Gaga, Katy Perry and the likes. And by fed up, I mean there was a time I didn't mind listening to them. Although I never bought their music, or downloaded them (I can say that since I didn't do it right?). Nor did I use the music streaming service I'm paying a monthly fee for to stream their music... ANYWAY, the following music I'm about to show you is not of one particular genre. And to skip to the point; I listen to all kinds of music (like my last.fm profile states). May it be dubstep or alternative rock. I even listen to Black Metal to widen the spectre even more, but not so much as of lately.
Btw I don't really know what counts as a single... I should probably just rename the topic to "Songs"...... Ah. Fuck it.
The first single I want to share with you is Kaizers Orchestra's Philemon Arthur & The Dung. The build up is awesome, and the whole song is just so catchy! They are one of my favorite bands, and since their first album back in 2001 they've never disappointed. in fact, they've just gotten better and better. Their latest album "Våre Demoner" was a blast, and it seems like their next one will be atleast as good:
There's something about the following song. I find it catchy and really like it. Btw isn't this what the kids listen to lately? Since I like this song, am I hip yet? :D "... on my yukulele" what is that anyway? Ok, here's the song:
And now for something completely different. I don't listen to a lot of electronica, but I LOVE dubstep. I once read a comment on a dubstep song at youtube: "Filthier than Adolf Hitler's K/D ration" also "Filthier than fingering my sister's pussy and finding her husband's wedding ring." There's something about the rawness of the songs that really appeals to be. I'm starting off easy with Flux Pavilion's remix of DJ Fresh's Gold Dust:
I could post a song by Cookie Monsta, but as you can't find anything more grimey I doubt the majority will like it. Instead here's Zed's Dead's Here Comes The Boom. I recommend you listen to this song with either a really good headset or in one of those cars with a sound system as expensive as the vehicle itself.
If I haven't lost your interest yet, here's one last song. Betatraxx is previously known as Redlight if you've heard of the name... who was... before that again Clipz.
So hey if anyone knows a good dubstep or rock single please pass it my way :) Post it in the comment section (slow motion:) BEELLOWWWW. Yeah I like Ray William Johnson. Sue me :P
Also please give me your opinions on the songs I posted. I'm interested in seeing what you guys think.
3 Comments
Like any other day, I was sitting on a stool, checking tickets to see if the passengers had the exclusive privilege to access to the international zone of the airport. Monotonely I ask every person if I may see their tickets. A middle eastern business man passes by and I asked him the question, characterized by the fact that I had asked it a thousand times before, "May I see your boarding pass, please?" "Here it is!" he replies, and passes me his proof of travel. I read it, and I say "Thank you" like I always do. Expecting him to move on, he suddenly stopped and bursted out "No, thank YOU my wonderful Norwegian! You are truly wonderful! Thank you! You are a wonderful Norwegian! You really are! Thank you!" after fearing for my life a couple of seconds, and not knowing what to respond, I say "... your... welcome? (WTF?)"
But in retroperspective I know what happened! I was recognised! Yes, my aura of undeniable greatness was too much for him to bear, and could not resist to show me the respect and gratitude that I truly deserve. My status as a blogger King is confirmed! I would thank you, middle eastern man, but that's below me. But I will, however, give you this: You are totally not a terrorist.
"Who is he?" The child asked, while pointing at a portrait of a rather handsome man that clearly radiates an aura of great importance. "That, my son, is your grandfather." his father answered. Then the child asked "Why haven't I heard of him?" and after a short break his father said "I'm sorry that I have not mentioned him before, I have not been able to. Some day you will hear of his tales. Mark my words. All I can say though, is that he is the most important blogger the internet have ever been touched by." He continued, "He was known as... Foggel. Blogger of undeniable greatness. I am not worthy to speak of him, but one day I will." A tear broke free of his left eye, "... one day I will."
Onwards! I always forget to update my status, and I never get past 3 days. Damn you, nonfunctional memory! One day I will get my revenge... somehow.
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