Go Team Evil!

Let's face it.  At one point or another, we've given thought to pursuing megalomaniacal world domination.  Unfortunately, giant space lasers, invincible armies and immortality are kind of hard to come by, so we have to settle for the next best thing.  For me, it's my very own Legion of Doom.  Only the vilest of the vile are welcome.  Those with a good diabolical laugh are of course a plus, although there is the downside to the fact that most every member would inevitably attempt a coup at one point or another.  But hey, that's the kind of risk you have to take when you form an evil organization.
Allow me to introduce you to my proposed charter members.

List items

  • Pros: Excellent skill at reprogramming Robot Masters to do his bidding. His mustache is invincible.

    Cons: He's only able to craft variations on the same plan over and over again, and it always fails.

  • Pros: Actually succeeded at destroying the world. The Insane Clown Posse has nothing on this guy.

    Cons: He's completely uncontrollable. Also, it's no fun ruling a world that's been destroyed.

  • Pros: Incredible strength and size, lending him well to a role as evil organization muscle.

    Cons: Steadfast refusal to wear a groin cup.

  • Pros: Has experience running an evil organization; steadfast in his goals.

    Cons: His desire for Kingdom Hearts is single-minded to the point that he practically refuses to think of anything else and leaves most of the work to his second in command. Lazy bastard.

  • Pros: Makes "Geese" an intimidating first name. A strict practitioner of the "He's not dead until they show the corpse" rule.

    Cons: A long track record of having his plans foiled by placing all of his faith in single-combat.

  • Pros: Refuses to stay down. Does not give up after repeated failures. He's a giant, fire-breathing turtle, for god's sake.

    Cons: Frequently done in by a portly Italian plumber. Questionable capabilities as a father. Skirt-chaser.

  • Pros: Has experience governing an entire kingdom; she is the law. She has more magic in her little finger than most of the others on this list have in their entire bodies. Also looks good in an orange dress.

    Cons: Complete and utter fixation on Lavos. She's like an insane Jehovah's Witness, only she doesn't want to share.

  • Pros: Manliness incarnate.

    Cons: I'd say a lack of depth perception, but he's too manly to let that get in his way.

  • Pros: Slaughtered an entire pantheon of gods and everyone else in his way, deserving or not.

    Cons: He's a petulant little shit that behaves like he's still sixteen.

  • Pros: Immortal, all-powerful incarnation of darkness.

    Cons: He died permanently in 1999 while off-screen. Crap.