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Jnal

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The End of Ryan Davis A New Start For Me

First off I'm no writer and certainly no creative wordsmith but here it goes.

I've been able to shutter serious emotions out of my life for a while now. Say what you will but, I swore to never get attached to things, or people because there is always an end and I hate endings. However driving home from work early due to being sick and seeing that Ryan Davis had passed broke something inside me. It took everything I had just to get home without breaking down. At first I couldn't place it. Of course I was sad that someone I've listened to and watched for 5 years is just suddenly gone but I only knew the Giant Bomb Ryan not the every day Ryan that Jeff and the rest knew. As I read more personal stories about Ryan as the day and the eventual night wore on I finally realized what it was I couldn't place. In one since envy, and in another sense longing. The personal stories of Ryan showed me that not only was every day Ryan the same as Giant Bomb Ryan but that he affected everyone he knew and even thousands that he didn't know. I realized that even though it may hurt the Ryan Davis way was far better then the way I had been progressing. I've never had the same type of relationship with friends as Ryan had with every one his co-workers and friends and realized what I was missing. The comradery he had with anyone he met and talked to is something that deep down inside I knew I wanted but never knew how to express. So with Ryan's passing I've made it a goal to be as open and caring as he was with people even though there is always an end. Even though he'll never know the ultimate difference he made in my life maybe in some way he will through the Giant Bomb community.

Take this for what you will, I know it sounds sappy and overplayed. Many others have expressed in better ways their feelings of Ryan but this is my way of saying good bye. Thanks Ryan for all the great moments. Good luck and have batman where ever you are.

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