An ancient Mesoamerican temple, except it's a tourist trap so the outer parts are filled with shitty people wearing hawaiian shirts. But also there are parts of it still being explored, so they have Indiana Jones-style traps. The costume progression would be like Tourist -> Security Guard -> Archaeologist.
An factory. A MEGAFACTORY like the one Elon Musk is building out in the desert. Just a gigantic facility filled with heavy machinery and robot arms.
A cloning facility wherein clones of Agent 47 are being made. Every NPC is you.
Killing the target without escaping the consequences of doing so is totally unimpressive to me. Any idiot can run up to a guy and shoot him. Doing so without successfully escaping afterwards is not a success, it's a failure.
From my perspective, therefore, they both achieved exactly the same thing with regards to the objectives - nothing. So I give the win to Dan, because his run was at least entertaining.
I'm 20ish hours into my first real game and loving it. The emergent stories are beautiful.
The thing I'm truly loving, though, is how little emphasis there is on "winning." My least favorite part of the Civ games is when I've established my neat little nation and suddenly the realization sets in that I'm supposed to be pursuing these "victory conditions," and if I don't, one of the AIs will get there first. I vastly prefer the Dwarf-Fortress-esque playstyle of setting your own goals and just pressing forward until you feel like you're ready to stop, and Stellaris accommodates that nicely.
I feel like there's an enormous amount of projection going on with DSIII. People who were really into Bloodborne are talking about how much Bloodborne they see in it. People who liked Demons Souls are pointing out the Demons Souls bits. So on and so forth.