I just hate the term "gamer." The argument about "chesser" or "boarder" or whatever that was brought up is perfect. It can be applied to anything. Are people who are way into movies called Moviers? Filmers? No, because it's stupid. We are people who enjoy playing video games. Lumping us into the category "gamers" makes us kind of sound like hippies. I am a person that plays way more video games than the average person and knows way more about video games than the average person (most of us here, if not all of us, do) and I would never call myself a gamer. Not because I don't think I "deserve" the title, but because I think it sounds stupid.
I think that girl was just trying to be nice by trying to relate to your hobby. Then again, I hate getting my haircut because for some reason the small talk with the stylist just irritates me. Plus, I'm lazy. I'm getting off topic now.
I, myself, have played a fair amount of Call of Duty. It's not my favorite game and not even my favorite shooter, but I enjoy it. And I can tell you that I am none of those things you listed about people who play it (except that I don't think Axe Body Spray smells all that bad). But I can understand your frustration. The ignorance about our hobby can bother me sometimes, but I try not to let it get to me too often.
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