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4.7 stars

Average score of 3 user reviews


The world today is in a sorry state. The badassery of law has been ruined by local commercials everywhere. You know, the ones with those mopey lawyers who want to get you fifty bucks because you got bit by a Schnauzer. You wanna know what law was like back in the good old days, you talk to this guy: Check out that glorious coif. Marvel at that monster finger that appears to be longer than his head. Behold the wonder of those impossible eyebrows. Now listen. Really listen. You can hear ...

0 out of 0 found this review helpful.

Murder!! (and penis monsters) 0

WARNING: This game is rated M for Mature and should only be played by persons over the age of 17. According to the back of the box, reasons for this include:    Alcohol Reference   Animated Blood   Language   Partial Nudity   Sexual Themes   Violence    Now, I don't wanna be the one to tell the fine folks over at the Entertainment Software Rating Board how to do their jobs, but I would have also included the following descriptors:    Massive Gender Confusion  Monster Strippers   Statutory Rap...

1 out of 1 found this review helpful.

In Space, No One Can Hear You Get Cut In Half Four Hundred Times 0

  If your girlfriend were stuck on a spaceship with an entire legion of reanimated nasty mutated stabby corpses, would you try to rescue her? Before you answer, you should know they look kinda like this:   The producers of the game studied photos of car crash victims in order to make the corpses more realistic. HELL YES, I'M READY FOR SOME FUN.   WARNING: If your objective is to have fun, do not select Hard Mode. I selected Hard Mode because I am a true man, and I spent the next 20-30 hours ge...

1 out of 2 found this review helpful.