Listen, I don't have a lot of time before that king bloke gets back, so I'll have to do this quick. Bushwald Sexyface here, and I thought I'd remind you gents how sexy your hobby is. In fact, I've selected several things about it which excel in the area of sexiness. I describe them as having "sexyllence."
It has the word "sexy" right in the title. The only way it could have more sexyllence would be if they made a game called Sexy Mustache. Alas, your industry fails to recognize my true sexiness.
One of the few modern games to honor the mustache in such a fine way. Too bad the sequel saw it fit to lock said mustache and its sexiness away from the world. WHAT HAVE YOU MONSTERS DONE!?
An old school tribute to the worldwide recognition to all mustaches and their great sexyllence.
The ultimate proof that one does not need a mustache to be sexy. All they need are two more testicles.
Games so sexy, that they rock your world with their fine sexyllence.
I must honor all games that manage to honor my sexyllence in such a fine way. No other game has perfected facial hair technology like this one. Not even that Final Fantasy X3 game thingy.
I wish I was there when they were filming the princess in the parking lots. Oy, would things be different. For one, I'd make her grow a 'stache.
Why you giving me that look, mate? Men can be sexy, and these men certainly are. They've removed all their clothes in an effort to reach terminal sexiness. Job well done, boys.
Another tale showing us a fine lad chasing after a hot piece of ass, this game also honored the phallic symbol. Never before have I seen a game honor the noble cock in such a fine way.
I have never seen a game do justice to The Great Mustache of our Time: Ron Jeremy. I only wish that others could realize his sexyllence.
I don't care what that king bloke says: this is the greatest game ever bestowed upon you. A flaming mustache fighting the forces of the unsexy as he tries to rescue hot, sexy ass? Truly, no other game has ever managed to live up to the sexyllence this game has created.
His sexyllence is the only one ever to surpass my own.
I understand that this bloke was given a Sexellence Award by the fine women of Earth. Although he is not sexyllent, sexellent is close enough in my book. That book, of course, is the Sexy Dictionary. Let me tell ya, it has a lot more pictures than those other dictionaries.
