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Virago

awww yeah E3

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No More Naked Men

By Virago 62 Comments

i'm not going to tell you any spoilers, I'm not going to give you my complete opinion, I'm just gonna let you know a few things about this Watchmen movie.
If you've never read the graphic novel, it's too late to start. You're going to watch it, and you're going to be corrupted by the movie version first, just as I was corrupted by the graphic novel. So, that said, here we go:

Best CGI: Dr. Manhatten. They got his glowy skin deal going on pretty accurately
Worst CGI: Bubastis. I mean, a snow leopard with deer antlers would've been more believable.

Best Sticking to the plot element: The characters. Absolutely spot on. Dan's still a wimp, Rorschack scares the poop out of me, and the Comedian, actually if anything, improved.
Worst Sticking to the plot element: Everything after the sex scene.

My favorite moment: Rorschack's "Never compromise" speech
My least favorite moment: Everything after the sex scene.

So yeah, I haven't wanted to walk out of a theater in a long time, so that was a cool experience. I loved that it stuck to the time period. I loved that the comedic element was expounded upon to make its point about human nature. I hated that the point came at the price of a rather ridiculous film.

Also, There's a lot of penises. It came to the point that a guy in front of us shouted "NO MORE NAKED MEN". Which gained a round of applause from the audience.
Okay. That's my review.

I hope you read the graphic novel.
<3 V

62 Comments

62 Comments

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jakob187

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Edited By jakob187

$55.7 million estimated opening weekend...makes it the 6th highest opening for an R-rated movie.  Less than 300's $70 million opening weekend, but then again...I expected it to be less.  That's still highly impressive for an R-rated movie.

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TheGTAvaccine

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Edited By TheGTAvaccine

Holy SHIT that movie was good. Very close to being as epic as the GN. I wish it were a bit longer though, and included the story between comic book kid and the newspaper guy.

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BoG

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Edited By BoG

So, they DON'T shove it in your face?

...

=(
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Jayge_

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Edited By Jayge_
Mercator said:
"This board has been amazing me lately...first their are folks who listen to the 2+ hour Bombcast more than once in a single week...now their are people disgusted and or made uneasy by a CGI penis.Sadly, I am not shocked....meat cleavers to the head...bones being ripped through flesh...no problemPenis wobbling in and out of scenes...cause for alarm...this country is sad."
Dude that topic scared the shit out of me too. I barely listen to it in one week. What the fuck. Creepy as hell.

On topic: I have yet to see this fucking movie. My bitch sister decided to tie up all the available cars in the house and she left me without a ride. Must. See. Dan in a 300 sex scene.
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Zenexo

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Edited By Zenexo

I cant believe some people are mature enough to see a penis on screen without freaking out. What a joke... Shame you didnt like it. I thought it was a great adaption and I read the GN.

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Zenexo

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Edited By Zenexo

also how did you manage to link your blog post with off topic? Im new soo, if you could let me know.

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jakob187

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Edited By jakob187
Jayge said:
"Mercator said:
"This board has been amazing me lately...first their are folks who listen to the 2+ hour Bombcast more than once in a single week...now their are people disgusted and or made uneasy by a CGI penis.Sadly, I am not shocked....meat cleavers to the head...bones being ripped through flesh...no problemPenis wobbling in and out of scenes...cause for alarm...this country is sad."
Dude that topic scared the shit out of me too. I barely listen to it in one week. What the fuck. Creepy as hell.On topic: I have yet to see this fucking movie. My bitch sister decided to tie up all the available cars in the house and she left me without a ride. Must. See. Dan in a 300 sex scene."
You could...ya know...look it up on the internet?  It's already on there...
...so I've heard.  >.>  <.<  O.O
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Jayge_

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Edited By Jayge_
jakob187 said:
"Jayge said:
"Mercator said:
"This board has been amazing me lately...first their are folks who listen to the 2+ hour Bombcast more than once in a single week...now their are people disgusted and or made uneasy by a CGI penis.Sadly, I am not shocked....meat cleavers to the head...bones being ripped through flesh...no problemPenis wobbling in and out of scenes...cause for alarm...this country is sad."
Dude that topic scared the shit out of me too. I barely listen to it in one week. What the fuck. Creepy as hell.On topic: I have yet to see this fucking movie. My bitch sister decided to tie up all the available cars in the house and she left me without a ride. Must. See. Dan in a 300 sex scene."
You could...ya know...look it up on the internet?  It's already on there...
...so I've heard.  >.>  <.<  O.O
"
Unlike most people, I actually like going to the theater. The people who you can yell at for talking on the phone, 32-fucking-oz. sodas... I dunno.
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jakob187

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Edited By jakob187
Jayge said:
"Unlike most people, I actually like going to the theater. The people who you can yell at for talking on the phone, 32-fucking-oz. sodas... I dunno."
I'm just trying to ease your wait...that's all.  LULZ
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zitosilva

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Edited By zitosilva

So I just watched and didn't really like it. I admit, I was ready to bash it for absolutely immature reasons (no the penis though, there are really people that care about that?). Anyway, I knew the script would be kind of... broken? since there's way too much content to be put into just three hours... but almost every other technical aspect left me wanting. Acting was really all over the place. Dr. Manhattan was good, but Daniel, Veidt and Rorschach were pretty bad. Also, did the soundtrack bother anyone else? I thought it was dreadful for the most part, and using a Leonard Cohen song with such a beautiful lyric as hallelujah to create a joke should be considered a crime. As I said before, it was obvious that the script would be hard to be put together, but I exepected it to be a little more well constructed. Maybe it was the best they could come up with, but the editing sure leaves a lot to be desired.

Lastly, the "revised ending". Sure, it somewhat passes the same message, though it leaves a few loop holes in the plot, but I don't expect many people to care about it that much. Too bad the whole part of the newspaper stand, specially the relationship between the kid and the old guy, which is one of the most important things in the Graphic Novel, was left out.

But I guess it can be entertaining to some, so I can't say it's completely terrible, just not good.

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jakob187

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Edited By jakob187
zitosilva said:
"So I just watched and didn't really like it. I admit, I was ready to bash it for absolutely immature reasons (no the penis though, there are really people that care about that?). Anyway, I knew the script would be kind of... broken? since there's way too much content to be put into just three hours... but almost every other technical aspect left me wanting. Acting was really all over the place. Dr. Manhattan was good, but Daniel, Veidt and Rorschach were pretty bad. Also, did the soundtrack bother anyone else? I thought it was dreadful for the most part, and using a Leonard Cohen song with such a beautiful lyric as hallelujah to create a joke should be considered a crime. As I said before, it was obvious that the script would be hard to be put together, but I exepected it to be a little more well constructed. Maybe it was the best they could come up with, but the editing sure leaves a lot to be desired.Lastly, the "revised ending". Sure, it somewhat passes the same message, though it leaves a few loop holes in the plot, but I don't expect many people to care about it that much. Too bad the whole part of the newspaper stand, specially the relationship between the kid and the old guy, which is one of the most important things in the Graphic Novel, was left out. But I guess it can be entertaining to some, so I can't say it's completely terrible, just not good."
A couple of things:
  • The soundtrack abides by the time period and references from the graphic novel.
  • The Tale of the Black Freighter, the comic book you mentioned...and all that stuff...is slightly shown in the movie at one point...but the actual entirety of it will be recut into the flick for the DVD version of the movie.  The actual animated short of Black Freighter, which is 22 minutes long and has Gerard Butler voicing The Mariner, will be released as a stand-alone DVD on March 24th.  The fact that this will be cut back into the movie DOES leave a bit of a plot hole, given that...ya know...the thing with the thing really ties in with the Black Freighter bits.  However, I'm sure it'll all work out.
  • The Leonard Cohen song was a beautiful lyric for a beautiful moment.  The afterburner part is the only funny part of that whole scene.  The fact that people would laugh about the wimpy loser getting to fuck the shit out of the hot chick pisses me off to no end.  Otherwise, I personally thought it was an *ahem* interesting choice, but still works well with what the scene is about...and not what people want to laugh at.
  • I'm sorry you didn't really dig it.  Hope you'll give it another go at some point.
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zitosilva

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Edited By zitosilva
jakob187 said:
A couple of things:
  • The soundtrack abides by the time period and references from the graphic novel.
  • The Tale of the Black Freighter, the comic book you mentioned...and all that stuff...is slightly shown in the movie at one point...but the actual entirety of it will be recut into the flick for the DVD version of the movie.  The actual animated short of Black Freighter, which is 22 minutes long and has Gerard Butler voicing The Mariner, will be released as a stand-alone DVD on March 24th.  The fact that this will be cut back into the movie DOES leave a bit of a plot hole, given that...ya know...the thing with the thing really ties in with the Black Freighter bits.  However, I'm sure it'll all work out.
  • The Leonard Cohen song was a beautiful lyric for a beautiful moment.  The afterburner part is the only funny part of that whole scene.  The fact that people would laugh about the wimpy loser getting to fuck the shit out of the hot chick pisses me off to no end.  Otherwise, I personally thought it was an *ahem* interesting choice, but still works well with what the scene is about...and not what people want to laugh at.
  • I'm sorry you didn't really dig it.  Hope you'll give it another go at some point.
"
Hum, let's see if I can be more clear about the soundtrack issues.. there were parts, for instance, first meeting between Rorschach and Daniel. When Daniel is left alone a little whiny guitar starts, imposing the "mood of sadness" which, dude, it looked liked a episode of that crappy sitcom Full House.

Maybe someone like you can understand the entire meaning of Hallelujah, but most people at theater laughed, do you know why? Because the music says "Hallelujah" when a guy finally gets an erection... and I can't even blame (too much) the audience. It was a conscious choice by the film makers.

I know that the Black Freighter was filmed and it'll be at the DVD. But the fact that it couldn't be put together as a whole is, yet, another proof that the cinema format does not work to tell Watchmen's story. And this really shows in lot's of places. For instance, you may disagree, but I think that the chapter when we're shown that Dr. Manhattan exists in all times at the same time is brilliant. Simply put, I believe it to be one of the most beautiful written art in human history (okay, maybe I'm going a little far, but you get what I'm saying). In the movie though, this scene is completely empty and devoid of meaning. It sadly wasn't even necessary in this format, because Manhattan's first line was, to paraphrase it, "Hi, I'm the dude that lives at the same time in every single time. Nice to meet you, audience". Scenes like this happen all the time, and they feel like a slap at the spectator. I can't see who will leave satisfied out of the theater. To those that read the graphic novel, it really shows how rough the movie is in many edges. And those that did not read, will probably not be able to grasp at the entire scenery that was tried to be created.

But just as I said before, I guess it can be entertaining. It has some high production levels, which nowadays is more than enough to some people. It's like an action flick. It can be fun to watch? Sure, I guess. Does that make the movie good? No, not really.