First off, I want to thank anyone who tuned into my Giant Bomb Community Endurance Run streams and/or donated. It was (mostly) a lot of fun and I managed to raise $500 for COVID-19 relief. You can find a playlist of my archived stream here. Unfortunately, I forgot to hit record for part of it, and I still need to do some editing before I upload my day 2 stream, but if you really want to watch multiple hours of me dying horribly in Temple of Elemental Evil, then doing marginally better in Wizardry 8 while talking about the Total War franchise with GB Moderator ZombiePie, you can certainly do that. However, the thing that has actually stuck with me the most is my final stretch goal, also known as:

The Wheel of Dubious RPGs

Like anyone who has had a Steam and GOG account for about a decade, it’s fair to say I have some random-ass shit dwelling in both libraries, most of it gained from earlier years of ill-advised sale purchases. My recent bad quarantine/stimulus check choices aside, (definitely gonna play through those lengthy PS2 JRPGs, just you wait) I’d like to think age, responsibility, and regret have led me to be more disciplined than I was during the dark era of Steam mega-sales with those daily and hourly deals. We live in a civilized age now, where everything is the same price for the duration of the sale and you can refund things. Also, I kinda already bought everything I wanted to buy around 2010-2014

However, the random-ass shit remains, forever entombed in the “hidden” portion of my libraries, never seeing the light of day… until quarantine drove me crazy enough to consider streaming video games on the internet. Despite having less time and less patience for the old and obscure than I used to, the idea of leveraging what I had on hand for the sake of charity sounded like a fun stretch goal. Unfortunately, I’ve accidentally invested too much thought and energy into it now and you’re forced to reap the results. Every week, I will spin the wheel and stream the game chosen by its dark power, and I’ll probably end up writing something up about it if I feel so inclined. I think it’s a fun gimmick for streaming and gives me a consistent concept to follow, which is probably more exciting than just playing something hot and cool and relevant. (also sometimes I will stream things that are hot and cool and relevant)

Now, at this point you’re probably wondering: What constitutes a “dubious” RPG anyway? The metascore? The obscurity? The cult following? Well, in the legendary words of Supreme Court Justice Potter Stewart: “I know it when I see it.” Dubiosity is more than a measure of quality, it’s a measure of being. Not everything currently on the wheel is a burning trash fire, although I have to say I’ve found some choice installments of otherwise beloved RPG franchises that should make for good internet television. I’ve actually been on the record as saying I like some of them (Might and Magic IX might be a blatantly unfinished mess, but it’s still Might and Magic) but my point is that you’re not going to be finding any Fallouts or Baldur’s Gates over here (well, I could play Fallout: Brotherhood of Steel but that just seems like a bad time). I’ve also mostly kept to stuff I already own and can stream on PC, although my copy of Greedfall is on PS4 and I’m more than willing to expand to console stuff and JRPGs if we get to that point.

With that said, here's my little write-up about the first game to make it off the wheel and onto my bad choice computer screen.

Rise of the Argonauts

Release Date: December 16, 2008 (Xbox 360, PS3, PC)

Developer: Liquid Entertainment

Time Played: A little under 5 hours

Dubiosity: 2 out of 5

Would I play more? Genuinely considering a full playthrough.

It was fortunate that this was the first game the wheel landed on (well, after Soulbringer broke everything and soft-locked my computer) because Rise of the Argonauts was the original inspiration for it in the first place. I wasn’t expecting the wheel to land on it again during my stream yesterday, but so the wheel wills, so it shall be. An action-RPG thrown out in the cold, barren mid-December from a developer more known for their RTS work, Rise of the Argonauts (also known as “The Adventures of Jason and Thicc Hercules”) has sat in my steam library for ages, untouched and unplayed until the wheel fatefully selected it. I have to assume I got it in a humble bundle at some point, because I had zero clue what it was until I actually started playing. It turns out that it’s… cut-rate Greek Mythology Mass Effect? Jason’s gotta get that Golden Fleece, there are three different locations he needs to go to, all while assembling a Bioware-esque team of fellow mythological figures and making dialogue choices that are attuned to four different gods of Olympus (Ares is Renegade, Apollo is Paragon, Athena is Lawful Neutral, and Hermes is clever.) There’s not exactly a huge emphasis on meaningful choices, but there sure is a lot of talking and some of the side quests feel like they come straight out of a mid-2000s Bioware game.

So, here’s the thing: I think this game might be totally alright. Perhaps it’s the skewed curve I’m working with here, but in spite of the obvious budget limitations, bad combat, and extremely 2008 PC port, I was having a genuinely okay time streaming Rise of the Argonauts. It has some neat ideas, like its leveling system being about dedicating your accomplishments to the gods, and thus far I’ve found the writing entirely acceptable by that mid-00s Bioware standard (the VA cast includes a bunch of veteran voice actors, such as Steve Blum, Cam Clarke, and Bioware regular/FemShep herself, Jennifer Hale), even if the occasionally bad line read or the unemotive character models takes me out of it. If nothing else, it only has a two on the dubiosity scale (dubiometer?) because there’s not very much bullshit for me to deal with between the talking, fighting, and occasional random crashes. Equipment is streamlined, leveling is straightforward, and there’s nary a half-assed mechanic or obnoxious subsystem in sight. What you see is what you get, essentially, and I think at this point I might just play more of it regardless of if it pops up again on the wheel or not because my priorities are a mess. Also Mutton Chops Hercules is hilarious and I will never stop goofing on the design they went with.

You can find the archive of my most recent stream on my twitch channel, and I’m intending on recording and archiving all of my streams on Youtube after this point. If you'd like to join in on my bad times, I'm planning on streaming 2-3 times a week for the foreseeable future (I'll figure out a more consistent schedule at some point, but for now following me is probably the easiest way to know when I'm doing stuff)

Next Game: Lands of Lore III

I'm always in support of questionable decisions like this. I've been planning on playing divinity 2, myself. Not sure I agree with everything on that wheel being on said wheel, but booooy howdy some things are right at home there.

If you want some potential JRPGs for the future, might I suggest something like the PS2 "classic"Ephemeral Fantasia?

@relkin: Just to be perfectly clear, I'm referring to Divinity 2: The Dragon Knight Saga, an action RPG that I'm pretty sure I played and didn't like circa 2011, and not Divinity Original Sin 2, which I might argue is the single best thing to come out of this recent "CRPG Renaissance." You can see the roots of the latter in the former, but Larian doesn't become a "great" developer until the first Original Sin in my eyes. (if that's not what you're referring to, I guess I'd be interested to know what you think isn't dubious enough to make the list)

As for JRPGs, that's definitely a "we'll get there when we get there" situation, because my level of tolerance for the excesses of that genre is generally a lot lower than my tolerance for some of the garbage CRPGs will throw at you. In any case, I know there are some real "gems" out there, especially on the PS2.

Nox is a fascinating game. Westwood studios making a weird Diablo that kinda owns.

Oh how many times I also tried to get Lionhart to work. I don't think I ever did end up playing it much further than the first couple of hours before I would get kind of tired of it. It just never clicked with me like Fallout and Fallout 2, no matter how much I wanted it to.

I look forward to reading more of this. Also, I...kind of liked Brotherhood of Steel and to this day I'm not entirely sure why. I think me at that age was just dying for anything similar to Fallout, even if in the end it ended up not really similar at all.

I realized that there are two Westwood games on this list (Lands of Lore is the other one) and I feel sort of bad for that, because they were probably one of the single most versatile developers of the 90s. Nox itself... seems like it might be a totally alright Diablo-like from the handful of minutes I messed with it to make sure it works? It and Sacred are mostly on the wheel because I wanted some post-Diablo Looter-RPG representation and I didn't feel like putting Divine Divinity on if Divinity 2 was already present.

The best thing about Lionheart: Legacy of the Crusader is that it straight up lies to the player about the kind of game it is. It has the S.P.E.C.I.A.L. stat system of Fallout and starts you in this city with a bunch of NPCs, skill opportunities, and factions, but once you leave it turns into a pretty straight hack-n-slash with little room for non-combat skills. Admittedly, it seems like the developers probably didn't have the time they needed (given that it was the last game published under the Black Isle name, right as Interplay was imploding) but the bait-and-switch nature of it is something I've wanted to show for a long time.

The actual successor to the Fallout 1 and 2 style is arguably Arcanum, which is probably too beloved to show up on the wheel even if I think that game is intimidating as hell and has some serious shortcomings. Well, Underrail is probably the more modern analogue, but once again that game seems like it might actually be pretty good so it's not on the wheel. Otherwise I might have to make a Wheel of Pretty Good RPGs and then what am I even doing with my life.

Ah, yes, I too love Arcanum even though at times it is kind of hella busted and at other times feels like the difficulty just spikes up to 1000 if you are not perfectly suited for a combat situation. Lionhart was the one I remember reading a blurb about and then trying to go back to and just hard to get going on, and that's before when I hear it allegedly basically turns into a bad Diablo.

@arbitrarywater: Oh, I was talking about that divinity 2. Heads up, it doesn't have a windowed mode option (The Developers Cut, at least), so you'll have to force it out of fullscreen mode in the xml file if you want to play it that way while streaming. I played the opening hour of it like that and it didn't crash or anything, but I've been burned by having to do that in the past, so who knows if it stays functional.

The ones I don't agree with being on that list are Dungeon Siege 3 and Dragon Age 2. DS3 is maybe the one game in that series that isn't dubious at all; just a decent Diablo-like. I'd only say that it's surprising there isn't more writing, considering the developer. And DA2...well, maybe dubious in terms of quality, but not...by nature? I dunno, it's just another DA game; just substantially worse than it's predecessor. Oh, and by the way, the one on that list I saw and began actually nodding my head in agreement to was Risen. Anything Pirahna Bytes.

Oh, and a lower tolerance for JRPG bullshit? How quickly we forget...

Dubious as it may be I really liked lionheart

I streamed Lands of Lore III today and I'm both glad and upset that it actually seems to be dubious in a way that makes sense for this feature. It's, uh, not as good as that first Lands of Lore, that's for sure.

So here's something I wrote 9 years ago and have zero recollection of in regards to Divinity 2. I can't believe I compared it to Terry Goodkind stuff, because that's way, way, way too harsh on Divinity. It turns out I really didn't like it though!

Admittedly, I don't think I've heard great things about Dungeon Siege 1 or 2 (they both look painfully generic) but I mostly judge Dungeon Siege 3 on the fact that it's the one Obsidian RPG no one talks about, and one that doesn't necessarily play to their strengths as a developer. You might be the first person I've read defending it in any capacity. Dragon Age 2 is... a game I've wanted to revisit for a while, because I liked it at the time and am definitely an apologist for it myself. It's also the token "big recognizable game" on a list full of random AA RPGs that run the gamut from "obscure at the time" to "popular within the community." Risen is definitely the Piranha Bytes representation... mostly because Gothic is too beloved and I have no interest in wrangling with that game's "unique" control scheme.

I'm not saying I don't have the capacity for JRPG bullshit, but also FWIW the actual combat of Tales of Symphonia 2 was at least sorta fine. The second you start to throw me into JRPGs that are nothing but bad, poorly-explained subsystems, the more likely I am to have a rough time. THAT SAID HOLY SHIT I SHOULD PLAY LOST KINGDOMS.

I genuinely like some of the games on this list! Wizards and Warriors is a bizarre, janky as hell thing and I'm going to be very excited when it inevitably shows up on the wheel.

@arbitrarywater: That's fair, where both of those games are concerned. Also, it'll probably be nice every once and a while to land on a genuinely decent game to both shake things up and really hammer home how...dubious some of the other things on that wheel are.

I'm also a bit of a DA2 apologist, myself. That's not a very good game, but I don't think it's half as bad as people make it out to be. I don't really understand the shit DS3 gets, though. Honestly, it's a fairly good game. Weird that there isn't more writing in it, but the mechanics are solid. I recommend playing as the fire lady; switching back and forth between her two different forms gives her a lot of play-style variety.

Also, I agree with your past (and hopefully present) self: The Sword of Truth books are garbage.

PS: If you're going down a From rabbit-hole, might I remind you that they made a Strat-RPG for the 360 (it involves a character who uses a saxophone to attack).

The CRPG Russian Roulette is the most dangerous of gaming's Russian Roulettes.

I was actually talking to someone about this and they brought up the idea of a wheel of nothing but dubious character action games/brawlers which sounds like it could be pretty miserable. Nothing but Dante's Inferno, Ninja Blade, Castlevania PS2 Games, and X-Blades as far as the eye can see.

But uh, I've tried to keep the general balance of this "initiative" towards a mix of stuff, quality-wise, with a wide variety of developers represented (also generally going for at least "AA" or "B" budgets because it feels weird to pick on smaller indie games) Otherwise I'd be playing nothing but the most dreadful Eurojank past and present, and I don't think people need to watch me lose my mind playing Bound by Flame, Ishar, or Inquisitor.

There are a couple of games specifically this makes me think of and they're both dubious more by "Its weird that you would do this" instead of how they actually turned out. Septerra Core and then the .. Ion Storm turned based wanna be JRPG Anachronox.

Both of those games (and perennial Jeff Gerstmann "favorite" Sudeki) are on the short list should I expand the wheel past its current roster. There's definitely something a little fascinating about the short-lived trend of western game developers chasing that Final Fantasy VII hype train by trying to make JRPG-styled games of their own.