It has been almost a month since my last blog. I think that's actually the longest I have ever gone without blogging since I started using the site on the day it launched back in 2008. This is my 300th blog, and I wanted to do something special. But after a while I realized that in trying to find the perfect 300th blog is a bit like trying to find the grail. I could keep searching forever and never find exactly what I wanted, when all I really want to do is write some more fucking blogs. I had surrendered my life to a search for virtual immortality.
My name is Endoge... er... what?My name is Sweep. Welcome to blog number 300.
This blog is a canvas upon which I vomit the contents of my mind. That canvas is then hung, with a mixture of apprehension, pride, and shame, upon the wall that is Giantbomb. For some reason, you people seem to enjoy looking at it. You sick bastards.
Here's some numbers:Sweep (that's me) has written 300 blogs in 838 days.
That's one blog every 2.79 days for two and a half years.
Those blogs have received a staggering 5938comments (yep, I counted them) from my fellow giantbombers, a number I still can't quite comprehend. I have amassed over 600 followers whom I love incessantly (though they terrify me), and 2,262 forum posts which I don't ever remember writing.
So... how did we get here?I guess the best place to start is the Giantbomb IRC. That's a pretty filthy place to begin, but I have to credit the amount of time I spent in there and all the awesome adventures we got up to as a result. I met many amazing people, some of whom are still here, some of whom are not. A large amount of those guys are still frequent flyers, still read and comment on my writing. That's where I met Mattbodega, JensonB, TokyoChicken and Disgaeamad. It was probably because of their Community Podcast, Bomb Should Have A Face, that my blog got any real recognition at all. This was back in the day when the "Are games art?" brigade still retained some form of credibility. But thanks to those guys people started reading my blogs and, well.... here we are.
A lot of shit happened during the time it took to write those 300 blogs, both to me and because of me. Where do we begin? That time someone turned me into a secret agent? Or perhaps that time I had a theme park based upon my likeness. At one point I was even running for president in an election that didn't actually exist. I appeared on community podcasts, where I subsequently acquired a new name for my penis, and have subtly featured in various Quick Looks and giantbomb video features. I have written successful blogs and unsuccessful blogs which are both, in my mind, equally horrifying. I founded the Giantbomb Drunken Bloggers Association Xtreme and maintain a series of bullet-point style blogs titled "Keeping It Simple" which, for some reason, people seem to genuinely enjoy. I feature in the giantbomb community song, and have been verbally assaulted by various members of Whiskey staff. I make as much effort as possible to inform and encourage new members of the site and forward them to other premium community content. I contribute to the various photoshop threads that make the giantbomb forums the best place on the internet. I even travelled the world and, on severaloccasions, I wrote blogs about it. I have featured in the Notable Events From Giantbomb Community series, and organise spontaneous community Bombing Runs whenever the mood takes me. I create gifs and (unsuccessfully) designed t-shirts. I was responsible for the giantbomb text adventure, I even had a poem written about me. I don't know why people enjoy reading my blogs but I have a sneaking suspicion it's because I have a bad habit of speaking my mind. Whatever the reason, I somehow came into possession of the 42nd most viewed profile on giantbomb.
And that's not even the half of it. I have such a hefty back-catalogue of blogs that i'm contemplating hiring an assistant to sort through them. I hear mattbodega is free, maybe I should give him a call...
When I picked out that cheeky little cheeseburger I never in my wildest (nor wettest) dreams imagined it would one day come to represent my entire zombie shooting, chainsaw loving, drum and bass obsessed personality. Somewhere along the line I physically turned into a hamburger. I'm completely ok with that.
Not long ago there was a thread on the forums which asked what each user was proud of having accomplished within the giantbomb community. I didn't really know what to say. Am I proud of all this shit? I guess so, which is why I wrote it all down. I appreciate this blog is pretty fucking narcissistic, but remembering each bizarre episode has made me all nostalgic and emotional. I hope you found something in that heap of junk that you remember and that makes you smile.
But what's really important here is for me to say thank you. It's because of you mongrels that all of this magical, disgusting bewilderness was allowed to exist. Without you, I am nothing. I hope you are fucking proud of yourselves.
So I guess all there is left to say is...