Sweeps 300th Blog

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sweep

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Edited By sweep  Moderator

It has been almost a month since my last blog. I think that's actually the longest I have ever gone without blogging since I started using the site on the day it launched back in 2008. This is my 300th blog, and I wanted to do something special. But after a while I realized that in trying to find the perfect 300th blog is a bit like trying to find the grail. I could keep searching forever and never find exactly what I wanted, when all I really want to do is write some more fucking blogs. I had surrendered my life to a search for virtual immortality.
 

My name is Endoge... er... what?

My name is Sweep. Welcome to blog number 300.  
 
No Caption Provided
This blog is a canvas upon which I vomit the contents of my mind. That canvas is then hung, with a mixture of apprehension, pride, and shame, upon the wall that is Giantbomb. For some reason, you people seem to enjoy looking at it. You sick bastards. 
 

Here's some numbers: 

Sweep (that's me) has written 300 blogs in 838 days. 

That's one blog every 2.79 days for two and a half years.

 
Those blogs have received a staggering 5938comments (yep, I counted them) from my fellow giantbombers, a number I still can't quite comprehend. I have amassed over 600 followers whom I love incessantly (though they terrify me), and 2,262 forum posts which I don't ever remember writing. 
   

So... how did we get here?

I guess the best place to start is the Giantbomb IRC. That's a pretty filthy place to begin, but I have to credit the amount of time I spent in there and all the awesome adventures we got up to as a result. I met many amazing people, some of whom are still here, some of whom are not. A large amount of those guys are still frequent flyers, still read and comment on my writing. That's where I met Mattbodega, JensonB, TokyoChicken and Disgaeamad. It was probably because of their Community Podcast, Bomb Should Have A Face, that my blog got any real recognition at all. This was back in the day when the "Are games art?" brigade still retained some form of credibility. But thanks to those guys people started reading my blogs and, well.... here we are. 
 
A lot of shit happened during the time it took to write those 300 blogs, both to me and because of me. Where do we begin? That time someone turned me into a secret agent? Or perhaps that time I had a theme park based upon my likeness. At one point I was even running for president in an election that didn't actually exist
No Caption Provided
I appeared on community podcasts, where I subsequently acquired a new name for my penis, and have subtly featured in various Quick Looks and giantbomb video features. I have written successful blogs and unsuccessful blogs which are both, in my mind, equally horrifying. I founded the Giantbomb Drunken Bloggers Association Xtreme and maintain a series of bullet-point style blogs titled "Keeping It Simple" which, for some reason, people seem to genuinely enjoy. I feature in the giantbomb community song, and have been verbally assaulted by various members of Whiskey staff. I make as much effort as possible to inform and encourage new members of the site and forward them to other premium community content. I contribute to the various photoshop threads that make the giantbomb forums the best place on the internet. I even travelled the world and, on severaloccasions, I wrote blogs about it. I have featured in the Notable Events From Giantbomb Community series, and organise spontaneous community Bombing Runs whenever the mood takes me. I create gifs and (unsuccessfully) designed t-shirts. I was responsible for the giantbomb text adventure, I even had a poem written about me. I don't know why people enjoy reading my blogs but I have a sneaking suspicion it's because I have a bad habit of speaking my mind. Whatever the reason, I somehow came into possession of the 42nd most viewed profile on giantbomb.

No Caption Provided
And that's not even the half of it. I have such a hefty back-catalogue of blogs that i'm contemplating hiring an assistant to sort through them. I hear mattbodega is free, maybe I should give him a call...  
 
When I picked out that cheeky little cheeseburger I never in my wildest (nor wettest) dreams imagined it would one day come to represent my entire zombie shooting, chainsaw loving, drum and bass obsessed personality. Somewhere along the line I physically turned into a hamburger. I'm completely ok with that.  


Not long ago there was a thread on the forums which asked what each user was proud of having accomplished within the giantbomb community. I didn't really know what to say. Am I proud of all this shit? I guess so, which is why I wrote it all down. I appreciate this blog is pretty fucking narcissistic, but remembering each bizarre episode has made me all nostalgic and emotional. I hope you found something in that heap of junk that you remember and that makes you smile.
 
But what's really important here is for me to say thank you. It's because of you mongrels that all of this magical, disgusting bewilderness was allowed to exist. Without you, I am nothing. I hope you are fucking proud of yourselves
 
So I guess all there is left to say is... 
 

Thanks For Reading 

Love Sweep. 

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sweep

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#1  Edited By sweep  Moderator

It has been almost a month since my last blog. I think that's actually the longest I have ever gone without blogging since I started using the site on the day it launched back in 2008. This is my 300th blog, and I wanted to do something special. But after a while I realized that in trying to find the perfect 300th blog is a bit like trying to find the grail. I could keep searching forever and never find exactly what I wanted, when all I really want to do is write some more fucking blogs. I had surrendered my life to a search for virtual immortality.
 

My name is Endoge... er... what?

My name is Sweep. Welcome to blog number 300.  
 
No Caption Provided
This blog is a canvas upon which I vomit the contents of my mind. That canvas is then hung, with a mixture of apprehension, pride, and shame, upon the wall that is Giantbomb. For some reason, you people seem to enjoy looking at it. You sick bastards. 
 

Here's some numbers: 

Sweep (that's me) has written 300 blogs in 838 days. 

That's one blog every 2.79 days for two and a half years.

 
Those blogs have received a staggering 5938comments (yep, I counted them) from my fellow giantbombers, a number I still can't quite comprehend. I have amassed over 600 followers whom I love incessantly (though they terrify me), and 2,262 forum posts which I don't ever remember writing. 
   

So... how did we get here?

I guess the best place to start is the Giantbomb IRC. That's a pretty filthy place to begin, but I have to credit the amount of time I spent in there and all the awesome adventures we got up to as a result. I met many amazing people, some of whom are still here, some of whom are not. A large amount of those guys are still frequent flyers, still read and comment on my writing. That's where I met Mattbodega, JensonB, TokyoChicken and Disgaeamad. It was probably because of their Community Podcast, Bomb Should Have A Face, that my blog got any real recognition at all. This was back in the day when the "Are games art?" brigade still retained some form of credibility. But thanks to those guys people started reading my blogs and, well.... here we are. 
 
A lot of shit happened during the time it took to write those 300 blogs, both to me and because of me. Where do we begin? That time someone turned me into a secret agent? Or perhaps that time I had a theme park based upon my likeness. At one point I was even running for president in an election that didn't actually exist
No Caption Provided
I appeared on community podcasts, where I subsequently acquired a new name for my penis, and have subtly featured in various Quick Looks and giantbomb video features. I have written successful blogs and unsuccessful blogs which are both, in my mind, equally horrifying. I founded the Giantbomb Drunken Bloggers Association Xtreme and maintain a series of bullet-point style blogs titled "Keeping It Simple" which, for some reason, people seem to genuinely enjoy. I feature in the giantbomb community song, and have been verbally assaulted by various members of Whiskey staff. I make as much effort as possible to inform and encourage new members of the site and forward them to other premium community content. I contribute to the various photoshop threads that make the giantbomb forums the best place on the internet. I even travelled the world and, on severaloccasions, I wrote blogs about it. I have featured in the Notable Events From Giantbomb Community series, and organise spontaneous community Bombing Runs whenever the mood takes me. I create gifs and (unsuccessfully) designed t-shirts. I was responsible for the giantbomb text adventure, I even had a poem written about me. I don't know why people enjoy reading my blogs but I have a sneaking suspicion it's because I have a bad habit of speaking my mind. Whatever the reason, I somehow came into possession of the 42nd most viewed profile on giantbomb.

No Caption Provided
And that's not even the half of it. I have such a hefty back-catalogue of blogs that i'm contemplating hiring an assistant to sort through them. I hear mattbodega is free, maybe I should give him a call...  
 
When I picked out that cheeky little cheeseburger I never in my wildest (nor wettest) dreams imagined it would one day come to represent my entire zombie shooting, chainsaw loving, drum and bass obsessed personality. Somewhere along the line I physically turned into a hamburger. I'm completely ok with that.  


Not long ago there was a thread on the forums which asked what each user was proud of having accomplished within the giantbomb community. I didn't really know what to say. Am I proud of all this shit? I guess so, which is why I wrote it all down. I appreciate this blog is pretty fucking narcissistic, but remembering each bizarre episode has made me all nostalgic and emotional. I hope you found something in that heap of junk that you remember and that makes you smile.
 
But what's really important here is for me to say thank you. It's because of you mongrels that all of this magical, disgusting bewilderness was allowed to exist. Without you, I am nothing. I hope you are fucking proud of yourselves
 
So I guess all there is left to say is... 
 

Thanks For Reading 

Love Sweep. 

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turboman

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#2  Edited By turboman  Staff

Yay Sweep!

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Hamst3r

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#3  Edited By Hamst3r

You are Sweep.
 
You. Are. Sweep.
 
Sweep? You are you.
 
This is you, Sweep. You.

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Jimbo

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#4  Edited By Jimbo

I'm only 300 blogs behind you.  Better keep one eye on the rear-view, sucka.

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MasterOfPenguins_Zell

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Gratz!

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Hamz

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#6  Edited By Hamz

 YEAH BITCHES! 300th BLOG! :D
 YEAH BITCHES! 300th BLOG! :D
Congratulations. Roll on the next 300 blogs, right!?
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Dalai

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#7  Edited By Dalai

I just noticed your cheese is below the meat. What the fuck is up with that?

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Scooper

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#8  Edited By Scooper

Nice one, brotha.

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danielkempster

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#9  Edited By danielkempster

Congrats on hitting such a prestigious milestone, Sweepers. As long as you keep putting these spectacular blogs out, you'll always have a solid readership here on the Bomb. Out of all the seventy-something bloggers I follow on this site, it's your blogs that always get me the most excited. I don't know what that says about either of us, but I do hope it comes across as the compliment it's intended to be.
 
You've also made me feel bad for not blogging as often as I'd like to. I need to attempt to remedy that. Maybe tomorrow, when I get in from work, after I've added to the short story I'm working on, and if this hideous cold will permit... (you see the problematic pattern emerging here?) 
 
Also-also, that gallery of Sweep-hamburger-people is brilliant.
 
...Anyway, I reiterate: well fucking done, Sweep. Here's to the next barrage of bloggery!

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Bloodgraiv3

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#10  Edited By Bloodgraiv3

NIce work dude, thats a milestone.
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AhmadMetallic

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#11  Edited By AhmadMetallic

you are like one big press event followed by a carnival and a party and perhaps a metal festival in germany with 40,000 attenders 
 
too flashy and and eventful for me

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mracoon

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#12  Edited By mracoon  Moderator

Congrats Sweep, you done good.

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Claude

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#13  Edited By Claude

Roll on Sweep, what a ride it's been.
 

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deactivated-61665c8292280

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@Dalai: I always took that to be mustard. 
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#15  Edited By ZombiePie  Staff
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danielkempster

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#16  Edited By danielkempster
@Dalai said:
" I just noticed your cheese is below the meat. What the fuck is up with that? "
@Sir_Ragnarok said:
" @Dalai: I always took that to be mustard.  "
Oh dammit, now I'm confused and need clarification. Sweep! get back in here and settle this!
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xXwindoverXx

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#17  Edited By xXwindoverXx

Congrats!

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Tylea002

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#18  Edited By Tylea002

That endogene reference will never go away, will it?
 
Mad props to the awesome that is sweep!

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Llama

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#19  Edited By Llama

Die in a fire!

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artofwar420

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#20  Edited By artofwar420

You're a great member of the GB_community.

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sweep

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#21  Edited By sweep  Moderator
@dankempster said:
" @Dalai said:
" I just noticed your cheese is below the meat. What the fuck is up with that? "
@Sir_Ragnarok said:
" @Dalai: I always took that to be mustard.  "
Oh dammit, now I'm confused and need clarification. Sweep! get back in here and settle this! "
It's cheese. Put it underneath so that it melts and soaks into the bap. That's how I roll. 
 
@Llama said:
" Die in a fire! "
I love you too.
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Video_Game_King

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#22  Edited By Video_Game_King

You ran for President a year ago? It's funny because democracy is inferior to any monarchy :P.

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regularassmilk

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#23  Edited By regularassmilk

Hey, congrats Sweep!
Good to know original members are still sticking around here. 
I joined right after the site launched, you were here too then right?

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W0lfbl1tzers

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#24  Edited By W0lfbl1tzers

Congrats baby.

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WatanabeKazuma

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#25  Edited By WatanabeKazuma

Well done Sweep, 300 is definitely an impressive number, as someone who constantly leaves half finished blog posts I appreciate that you can keep going like you do, puts me to shame!
 
You're probably the best user I have followed who has an avatar based off of a T-Shirt design, and that's saying something!
 
Ah, overuse of exclamation points so I'll leave it at that. Keep up the good work!

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Dalai

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#26  Edited By Dalai
@Llama said:
" Die in a fire! "
You do realize he's flame-broiled.
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Bam_D_Leprechaun

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#27  Edited By Bam_D_Leprechaun

I wish i was awesome like you sweep

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Llama

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#28  Edited By Llama
@Dalai: We should do a sort of Archon meld into an uber Divine Llama
UNSTOPABLE BWHAA<AUAHAUH<AH<DSFHUHSDKFsd
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#29  Edited By ZeroCast

My gift to you is the following Sweep :).
 
    

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JJWeatherman

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#30  Edited By JJWeatherman

What the hell. How does this have 11,000 views within an hour?

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WatanabeKazuma

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#31  Edited By WatanabeKazuma
@JJWeatherman said:
" What the hell. How does this have 11,000 views within an hour? "
Lies, filthy lies.
 
Also burgers = Views.
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wunder_

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#32  Edited By wunder_

Sweep is SO sexy.

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natetodamax

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#33  Edited By natetodamax
@JJWeatherman said:

" What the hell. How does this have 11,000 views within an hour? "

Someone holding F5
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Red12b

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#34  Edited By Red12b

 
My favorite, always makes me chuckle. 
 
Good shit Sweep.  
 
GBDBAX AWAY!
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sweep

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#35  Edited By sweep  Moderator
@JJWeatherman said:
" What the hell. How does this have 11,000 views within an hour? "
I have no idea but I am really, really scared :S
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Dalai

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#36  Edited By Dalai

Maybe we should all F5 and blow this fucker up!

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MattyFTM

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#37  Edited By MattyFTM  Moderator

300 blogs... and only half of them were posted when you were drunk :P

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mikemcn

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#38  Edited By mikemcn
Thanks for all the awesomeness!
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Bigandtasty

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#40  Edited By Bigandtasty

Sweep is a cool dude. Thanks for making Giant Bomb forums have better stuff inside them.

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jakob187

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#41  Edited By jakob187

Looking through your entire track record of things that you listed, I've noticed that rape is not included. 
 
It's good to know you haven't been raped on Giant Bomb.  = D 
 
Grats on 300, Sweep.  As someone who has written half as many blogs, it's staggering to think of writing 300 blogs.  Then again, with as longwinded as some of my comments can get, maybe I understand good and well what 300 blogs is like and just don't realize it.

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#42  Edited By Rowr

    

  

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lemon360

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#43  Edited By lemon360

You are an internet legend mister.

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fishmicmuffin

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#44  Edited By fishmicmuffin

Keep it up man, I enjoy reading your blogs whenever you post them. Here's to 300 more!

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#45  Edited By Damian

Wow, Sweep! 300, huh? 
You're either the real super meat boy, or a grade-A meat-head. 
BWAHAHAHAHA ... Haha ... heh ... ehem. 
 
You don't know from jokes!

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KnifeySpoony

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#46  Edited By KnifeySpoony

In the words of Sweep, "Why was I not a part of this."

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TheGreatGuero

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#47  Edited By TheGreatGuero

Dude, Sweep, you are the ultimate Giant Bomb member. Congrats on the 300th blog. I really enjoyed reading it, and look forward to reading more... maybe...

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gamer_152

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#48  Edited By gamer_152  Moderator

Congratulations on the big three zero zero Sweep, you certainly made it a blog to remember.

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TwoLines

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#49  Edited By TwoLines

Here's to 300 more!

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Ineedaname

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#50  Edited By Ineedaname

I love you too sweep.

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