The Death of a Video Game Benchmark

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#201 Edited by KaneRobot (2668 posts) -

Terri Runnels vs Val Venis vs Triple H 3 way match in that first N64 pic. Good times... I guess.

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#202 Edited by MattyFTM (14804 posts) -

I'm submitting this article to the game journalism prize. If it doesn't win, it's a fix. It is scientifically impossible to write a better article than this.

Moderator
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#203 Posted by Sweep (10174 posts) -

I don't actually think it's a hardware issue. Hair has always been a bitch to produce with a high degree of naturalism. Even when you can pre-render it and cache the animation it's difficult to get it to look like actual hair and not just a high-resolution cloth model with an elaborate hair texture stuck over the top. While more processing power would help with the cloth and higher resolution textures, the animation capabilities already exist, they just aren't often implemented very well.

You can actually get a job in the film industry as a groomer - that's the official job title - and your job is entirely about getting hair and fur to animate realistically. That's how intense this shit gets.

There's a long list of graphical junk that needs to be addressed. My own personal beefs include:

  • Clipping during in-game cut-scenes. That's just fucking lazy, shitty animation.
  • Clipping in general. I mean really?
  • Water that has no fluidity. That's a hardware thing, again.
  • Hands with no bones - when characters pick shit up with disembodied stumps on the ends of their arms.

I could go on...

Moderator
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#204 Posted by SinGulaR (2553 posts) -

I stopped watching wrestling at the age of 16. But to see a professional wrestler becoming the CEO of Futuremark by getting a haircu... wait...

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#205 Edited by Phoenix87 (703 posts) -

Botchamania is the greatest thing ever, and kane should have never taken off the mask.

and jeff should really do a Raw rundown or something each week. Cause I aint gonna watch it.

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#206 Posted by Joey2683 (422 posts) -

It really must be a slow week. Sorry

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#207 Posted by Zaxex (625 posts) -

I thought this story was going to be about FutureMark going under or something.

This is much worse.

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#208 Posted by Fattony12000 (8273 posts) -

NEW PREMIUM VIDEO LIVESTREAM...

Gerstmann and Ryckert Wrestin' Talk

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#209 Posted by ProfessorEss (7957 posts) -

Hunter... how could you.

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#210 Posted by Vexxan (4633 posts) -
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#211 Posted by Korolev (1800 posts) -

Why does Triple H no longer love America?

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#212 Posted by Evercaptor (436 posts) -

Is Destructoid.com's Jim Sterling ghost writing for Jeff? Unregardless, I enjoyed this article.

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#213 Posted by Ladnar (218 posts) -

More stories like this, so good. Also bring back Mankind! His shitty hummingbird nest of hair could be Triple H's replacement.

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#214 Posted by wolfskind (101 posts) -

A sad sad day. :/

But a great article. We need more of this.

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#215 Posted by Edmundus (550 posts) -

DOOSH

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#216 Posted by sickVisionz (1307 posts) -

Huk yuk

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#217 Posted by dropabombonit (1542 posts) -

I remembering joking with my friend the other day that he should just cut it but now that he has done it I'm actually sad

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#218 Posted by Brodehouse (10827 posts) -

I love that video.

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#219 Posted by MachoFantastico (6285 posts) -

Remember when sweat was all the rage, games would go out of their way to show athlete's sweating.

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#220 Posted by thesage (53 posts) -

This is my favorite article of all time.

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#221 Posted by Crelio (154 posts) -

The world is truly ending this year, this is the first sign!

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#222 Posted by camp7203 (128 posts) -

HHH has a kid and wife that have the physique of grimace.

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#223 Posted by Meltac (2008 posts) -

Huh?

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#224 Posted by Winternet (8397 posts) -

I have yet to read this article, but it's looking like it's amazing.

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#225 Posted by TheUnsavedHero (1308 posts) -

His transformation into Vince McMahon is complete...

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#226 Posted by RoyCampbell (1092 posts) -
@Joey2683 said:

It really must be a slow week. Sorry @Jeff

dafuq
 
Flavor articles denote slow weeks now, I guess.
 
Kotaku's calling you.
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#227 Posted by Winternet (8397 posts) -

My initial impressions were spot on. This article IS amazing!

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#228 Posted by Shaka999 (550 posts) -

@thesage said:

This is my favorite article of all time.

"I am commander shepard and this is my favorite article on Giantbomb."

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#229 Posted by Veektarius (6102 posts) -

I was incredibly confused until I spent a minute thinking about what I'd just seen.

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#230 Posted by RabidBadger (51 posts) -

My thoughts and prayers go out to Triple H's and family... His hair will be missed by us all.

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#231 Posted by MachoFantastico (6285 posts) -

Wrestling... the male soap opera.

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#232 Posted by AiurFlux (953 posts) -

There's not only this but I just found out that Kevin Butler did a Bridgestone commercial promoting the Wii. The world is fucking ending. I'm sure of it now.

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#233 Posted by Excast (1368 posts) -

Oh dear god no.  Not the hair.  Not those beautiful locks.

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#234 Posted by Ramone (3080 posts) -

Thank you for introducing me to Botchamania Jeff.

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#235 Posted by TechnicallyProficient (95 posts) -

Damn, I wanted a Triple H vs. Brock Lesnar Wrestlemania rematch with a Hair vs. Chest Tattoo stipulation.

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#236 Posted by ArtisanBreads (8086 posts) -

Great article Jeff.

Considering all the focus on the old Attitude era of WWF in this game though I bet HHH's long hair is still in. Regardless, gave me a good laugh and I love that video.

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#237 Posted by Satsugai (78 posts) -

There will probably always be alternate skins.

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#238 Posted by UltimAXE (573 posts) -

I love how this is news on a video game website.

HHH looks weird with short hair, but, then, they all do.

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#239 Posted by ShinjiEx (793 posts) -

Quality thread here ^__^

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#240 Posted by dangeRUSS04 (107 posts) -

damnit now i fell down the botchamania hole

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#241 Posted by Keeng (1023 posts) -

This is actually, legitimately depressing.

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#242 Posted by dudeglove (12579 posts) -

He'll make a comeback.

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#243 Posted by stinky (1564 posts) -

@Demoskinos said:

@sempiternal said:

I did wonder a few weeks ago during his teary promo on Raw if he would ever cut his hair now that he's gone from being "semi-retired" to "possibly another couple of matches in him somewhere down the line but pretty much retired". Took him like two weeks.

Nobody in wrestling is ever really retired.

how about Macho Man?

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#244 Posted by Zelnox (455 posts) -

Unbelievable

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#245 Posted by RuthLoose (909 posts) -

@RoyCampbell said:

@Joey2683 said:

It really must be a slow week. Sorry @Jeff

dafuq Flavor articles denote slow weeks now, I guess. Kotaku's calling you.

Kotaku? Now that's just in poor taste, good sir.

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#246 Posted by stinky (1564 posts) -

wanted to share this news while surfing TMZ, heads up:

SOFIA VERGARA
Eats a Banana

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#247 Posted by RoyCampbell (1092 posts) -
@RuthLoose said:

@RoyCampbell said:

@Joey2683 said:

It really must be a slow week. Sorry @Jeff

dafuq Flavor articles denote slow weeks now, I guess. Kotaku's calling you.

Kotaku? Now that's just in poor taste, good sir.

Well intended.
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#248 Posted by delsaber (216 posts) -

Triple H is now one British accent and several character deaths away from becoming Sean Bean. Except he never jobs to anyone. /rimshot

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#249 Posted by Pop (2708 posts) -

Maybe there will be a classic skin for Triple H in the next wrestling game so we can still benchmark the new systems.

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#250 Posted by SpartanHoplite (429 posts) -

aah, mmkayy? 8/

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