X-Blades Glamour Shoot: A Giant Bomb Exxxclusive

The only things I know about X-Blades are that it's being published by SouthPeak, it's being developed somewhere in Russia, and every mention of the game I've seen has been, without fail, accompanied by a barrage of images of hyper-sexxxy half-naked anime-girl asses. Now I'm not going to sit here and act like I don't appreciate an artistic interpretation of the female form, a point I will prove right now with these totally hot ASCII boobs ( . )( . ) but c'mon guys. There's nothing sexy about trying so goddamn hard. So, imagine my surprise when we receive a package from SouthPeak today containing three drab, heather-grey X-Blades promotional shirts that feature just the logo! Not even a hint of g-string! Of course, sexy samaritans that we are, we decided to lend SouthPeak a hand a by staging an impromptu photo shoot proving that it's the attitude, not the tailor, that defines sexinessitudity.

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Perhaps best of all, the FedEx package these shirts came in didn't include the actual game itself, despite the fact that X-Blades is scheduled for release on the Xbox 360, PlayStation 3, and PC next week. I guess these awesome shirts will have to tide us over!