Bioshock Review
So I got myself an xBox mainly for the need of a new console, and partly because I was desperate to play the game that's given so many reviewers a big huge stiffy. So I went and bought it, got home and started to play.
As soon as I got into Rapture I was confronted with a Spider Splicer. After it was chased off, I noticed I didn't see one until about half an hour into the game later, which kind of confused me. Shouldn't something I see straight away be everywhere? Or did this one splicer run off and tell all it's spider splicer friends that there was a nasty man running around with my all powerful wrench?
Either way, It was a warm and fuzzy welcome. I killed a few splicers, ran about drinking as much virtual alcohol as possible to see how playing with the screen wobbly would affect my gaming, but as soon as I was told to zap splicers which are in the water, I lost the need for a wrench, being as the game is based in a leaking underwater city.
As I advanced in the game, I started to collect audio diaries. Which I would then have to replay as they were interrupted by that 'Atlas' fellow, so important things like door codes and the history of Rapture were missed and I resorted to a walkthrough to find an elevator code.
But don't get me wrong, the game WAS fun. I had a jolly good time running about placing cyclones everywhere, running behind cover and watching my enemies ragdoll about everywhere. I also found out the advantage of fully researching turrets and bots, as once I had done this, my 'hacking' days were over, as I could now instantly hack anything like some sort of human super computer.
As I approached the ending I was confronted with my arch nemesis Mr.ESCORT MISSION!
That's right, I was finally getting through a game where I hadn't had to escort about some retard who can't look after themselves, and then I needed a little sister to help me 'GET THROUGH DOORS'. I'm sorry, but I thought I was buffed up with superpowers and mad tonic skills, now you're telling me I can destroy turrents, big daddies and security bots, but not wooden doors? Thanks for that.
Then I finally got to the final boss and completely raped him, due to the fact that the crossbow is so overpowered, Big Daddy's were now as threatening as sand. Sure they may be a bit bothersome getting in all your cracks, but they're easilly gotten rid of.
Then I got to watch an ending where I was a superevil madman becase I'd harvested one too many (all of them) little sisters. But how can you blame me for that? I'm stuck in an underwater hell and you want me to save some little cretins who creep the hell out of me? No chance.
However, the game was very atmospheric, I enjoy playing it over and over and it's still a laugh watching enemies ragdoll in the air because they were stupid enough to walk into a cyclone.
Bioshock is currently sitting my top 5 favourite games list and there it shall stay.
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