My ongoing feud with insomnia continues.  It seems that I can't get more than a few hours of unrestful sleep each night.  I lie in bed awake until 2AM-ish until my body lets me fall asleep, only to awaken me at 5 or 6 AM, at which point I cannot go back to sleep and end up loitering in bed for six hours or so.
 
Last night, December 24th, I managed to get to bed at about 1AM, having finished my Christmas wrapping and card-writing later than anticipated.  As exhausted as I was, I couldn't fall asleep for a long time.  But when I did, the dreams I had were more fucked up than usual.
 
I don't remember the order in which I dreamt them, but there were a few of them.  On Christmas Eve, my mother told me to shave and look presentable as she wanted to take some photos to send to my grandmother, fearing that the old lady would not live to see 2012.  My mind and heart were elsewhere, as I longed to see my girlfriend again.  These factors all contributed to the strange dreams, I think.
 
In the dream, my grandmother had died and the family intended to go to her funeral in the States.  I should probably mention that I'm not the best of ground with that side of the family.  While I appreciate all that my grandmother has done, I don't really have anything else to say to her (both in real life and in the dream).  In the dream, my older brother and I were driving to his office in his officemate's truck.  We got to the office, but I don't know what happened then.  Like in real life, I just wasn't paying attention.
 
My mother took my grandmother's death very badly, as she will in real life.  For some reason, my brother and I decided to go to native spiritual medicine woman to ask for help, or something.  Not that I believe in any of that, but I guess we just needed an opinion about what to do for our saddened mother.  I brought a friend along with me, a female friend I don't know in real life, but was apparently close with in the dream.  She was friendly with me at the medicine woman's, just like my real-life girlfriend was with me the night that we met up for the first time in over a year, before we started dating and I accidentally got her drunk (which helped her overcome her shyness, at least).
 
In the dream, I had no intention of going to my grandmother's funeral.  I did not want to go there at all.  I would have to see family members I don't get along with, I wouldn't fit in, and I don't think it would have ended well at all.  Besides, I don't have a passport, so I couldn't even cross the border to begin with.  I didn't tell my family that I didn't want to go.
 
For some reason, in the dream, I think my girlfriend and I were further along in our relationship than we are in real life.  In the dream, I was going through the laundry, and I found some of her clothes at my place - the top she had worn on the day we started dating in real life.  I don't know what that was doing there (I don't mean psycho-analytically) - why would she just have left her clothes there?  Did she borrow one of my shirts?  Did she just go home wearing only her jacket and undergarments on top?  In the dream, I let her know that she had left her clothes at my place and I intended to give them back to her.  Also, at home, I was wearing my fedora indoors, and there was a little brown sparrow that got inside the house and was sitting on the hat.  I wanted to put him in a cage and keep him as a pet.  My pet lovebird died this year; maybe that's why I dreamt of the bird.
 
I dreamt it was a Thursday night.  My brother and I would meet at his office on Friday and drive down to the States for the funeral on Saturday and Sunday, heading back home on Monday.  My girlfriend and I had plans for the Tuesday.  On the Thursday night in the dream, I had just emerged from the shower and my brother was trying to speak to me seriously.  I hadn't told the family that I did not intend on attending the funeral, but my brother had his suspicions.  As I had just gotten out of the shower, my brother must really have been in a hurry to speak to me.  I was, after all, naked.  But I wasn't really listening to him because I watched my girlfriend climb the stairs.  I don't know how she got into my house; maybe in the dream world I had given her a key, or something.  I was so glad to see her that I rushed towards her and embraced her.  I was hugging her, looking over her shoulder at my brother, smiling because I was with my lover - it was clear to him that I was not paying any attention to what he had to say.  He left in anger, and would later send me an email telling me to meet him at his office tomorrow because we needed to talk over lunch.  I don't think he was too thrilled that I planned on blowing off my family to spend the weekend with my lover.
 
Once my brother had left, it dawned on me that I was hugging my girlfriend completely naked.  For some reason, she had started taking off her clothing as well.  I told her to wait while I rushed off to find some clothes for me and a robe for her.  I grabbed some boxers and once I had put them on, realized they were longjohns.  At this moment, she entered the room, having helped herself the to robe which was already in the bathroom, and saw me in the ridiculous long underwear.  Very sexy...
 
I guess we decided to go on our own trip, because later, I dreamt that she and I were on a coach travelling across Canada.  I don't know if we were on vacation, avoiding the funeral, or running away together.  Strangely enough, this wasn't the first time I've dreamt of being on a bus with a lover - I've made another blog post about another strange dream which featured a girl I loved being on a bus with me.  And that dream was about Christmas, too, now that I think of it, and my older brother was in it as well.
 
I had some other weird dreams that night.  I dreamt that my father had given my younger brother and I some Iron Man t-shirts for Christmas, and my brother's one had all kinds of pictures of Iron Man merchandise on it, including images of SNES cartridges of Iron Man games.  I think that's because on December 24th in real life, my older and younger brothers were both playing Street Fighter II Turbo for SNES together, and a friend had given me a figure from the Iron Man 2 movie line.
 
Another dream featured me in a field off a highway watching a film crew shoot a special effects shot for a TRON movie.  A helicopter was carrying a Recognizer which they crashed into the ground.  In the real world, my older brother had bought us tickets to TRON: Legacy, so that was on my mind and probably fuelled the dream.
 
The final dream I had that night, the one which caused me to wake up at 5AM, had me online, looking at my girlfriend's Tumblr page, as I often do, and decided to post an image reply.  So I tried uploading a silly picture I'd found on the internet, but the site would not let me because it was considered to be pornographic.  Somehow, they thought the image I'd uploaded was one which was posted on a porn blog and I was directed to the page on which the image was supposed to be found.  The porn pictures I found myself looking at weren't particularly sexy, but regardless, I soon found myself awake in the real world and in need of a change of underwear.  I hadn't surfed porn or fapped on over a month (being in love with my girlfriend had me satisfied enough), but I guess my body wanted back into the old rut again.  So, there was I was, awake at 5AM on December 25th, in the bathroom, washing myself off for having climaxed to a dream in which I was browsing a lame porn blog.  I guess you could say--
 
--that Christmas came early.  YEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!
 
In case it's not explicitly clear, I think something is seriously wrong with me.  I feel like just crashing and sleeping for a week in hopes of recovering what might be left of my sanity, but I fear that I would just be exposed to other strange dreams like the ones I've just ranted about.  Ah well.  I guess I'll just have to get used to it.

My ongoing feud with insomnia continues.  It seems that I can't get more than a few hours of unrestful sleep each night.  I lie in bed awake until 2AM-ish until my body lets me fall asleep, only to awaken me at 5 or 6 AM, at which point I cannot go back to sleep and end up loitering in bed for six hours or so.
 
Last night, December 24th, I managed to get to bed at about 1AM, having finished my Christmas wrapping and card-writing later than anticipated.  As exhausted as I was, I couldn't fall asleep for a long time.  But when I did, the dreams I had were more fucked up than usual.
 
I don't remember the order in which I dreamt them, but there were a few of them.  On Christmas Eve, my mother told me to shave and look presentable as she wanted to take some photos to send to my grandmother, fearing that the old lady would not live to see 2012.  My mind and heart were elsewhere, as I longed to see my girlfriend again.  These factors all contributed to the strange dreams, I think.
 
In the dream, my grandmother had died and the family intended to go to her funeral in the States.  I should probably mention that I'm not the best of ground with that side of the family.  While I appreciate all that my grandmother has done, I don't really have anything else to say to her (both in real life and in the dream).  In the dream, my older brother and I were driving to his office in his officemate's truck.  We got to the office, but I don't know what happened then.  Like in real life, I just wasn't paying attention.
 
My mother took my grandmother's death very badly, as she will in real life.  For some reason, my brother and I decided to go to native spiritual medicine woman to ask for help, or something.  Not that I believe in any of that, but I guess we just needed an opinion about what to do for our saddened mother.  I brought a friend along with me, a female friend I don't know in real life, but was apparently close with in the dream.  She was friendly with me at the medicine woman's, just like my real-life girlfriend was with me the night that we met up for the first time in over a year, before we started dating and I accidentally got her drunk (which helped her overcome her shyness, at least).
 
In the dream, I had no intention of going to my grandmother's funeral.  I did not want to go there at all.  I would have to see family members I don't get along with, I wouldn't fit in, and I don't think it would have ended well at all.  Besides, I don't have a passport, so I couldn't even cross the border to begin with.  I didn't tell my family that I didn't want to go.
 
For some reason, in the dream, I think my girlfriend and I were further along in our relationship than we are in real life.  In the dream, I was going through the laundry, and I found some of her clothes at my place - the top she had worn on the day we started dating in real life.  I don't know what that was doing there (I don't mean psycho-analytically) - why would she just have left her clothes there?  Did she borrow one of my shirts?  Did she just go home wearing only her jacket and undergarments on top?  In the dream, I let her know that she had left her clothes at my place and I intended to give them back to her.  Also, at home, I was wearing my fedora indoors, and there was a little brown sparrow that got inside the house and was sitting on the hat.  I wanted to put him in a cage and keep him as a pet.  My pet lovebird died this year; maybe that's why I dreamt of the bird.
 
I dreamt it was a Thursday night.  My brother and I would meet at his office on Friday and drive down to the States for the funeral on Saturday and Sunday, heading back home on Monday.  My girlfriend and I had plans for the Tuesday.  On the Thursday night in the dream, I had just emerged from the shower and my brother was trying to speak to me seriously.  I hadn't told the family that I did not intend on attending the funeral, but my brother had his suspicions.  As I had just gotten out of the shower, my brother must really have been in a hurry to speak to me.  I was, after all, naked.  But I wasn't really listening to him because I watched my girlfriend climb the stairs.  I don't know how she got into my house; maybe in the dream world I had given her a key, or something.  I was so glad to see her that I rushed towards her and embraced her.  I was hugging her, looking over her shoulder at my brother, smiling because I was with my lover - it was clear to him that I was not paying any attention to what he had to say.  He left in anger, and would later send me an email telling me to meet him at his office tomorrow because we needed to talk over lunch.  I don't think he was too thrilled that I planned on blowing off my family to spend the weekend with my lover.
 
Once my brother had left, it dawned on me that I was hugging my girlfriend completely naked.  For some reason, she had started taking off her clothing as well.  I told her to wait while I rushed off to find some clothes for me and a robe for her.  I grabbed some boxers and once I had put them on, realized they were longjohns.  At this moment, she entered the room, having helped herself the to robe which was already in the bathroom, and saw me in the ridiculous long underwear.  Very sexy...
 
I guess we decided to go on our own trip, because later, I dreamt that she and I were on a coach travelling across Canada.  I don't know if we were on vacation, avoiding the funeral, or running away together.  Strangely enough, this wasn't the first time I've dreamt of being on a bus with a lover - I've made another blog post about another strange dream which featured a girl I loved being on a bus with me.  And that dream was about Christmas, too, now that I think of it, and my older brother was in it as well.
 
I had some other weird dreams that night.  I dreamt that my father had given my younger brother and I some Iron Man t-shirts for Christmas, and my brother's one had all kinds of pictures of Iron Man merchandise on it, including images of SNES cartridges of Iron Man games.  I think that's because on December 24th in real life, my older and younger brothers were both playing Street Fighter II Turbo for SNES together, and a friend had given me a figure from the Iron Man 2 movie line.
 
Another dream featured me in a field off a highway watching a film crew shoot a special effects shot for a TRON movie.  A helicopter was carrying a Recognizer which they crashed into the ground.  In the real world, my older brother had bought us tickets to TRON: Legacy, so that was on my mind and probably fuelled the dream.
 
The final dream I had that night, the one which caused me to wake up at 5AM, had me online, looking at my girlfriend's Tumblr page, as I often do, and decided to post an image reply.  So I tried uploading a silly picture I'd found on the internet, but the site would not let me because it was considered to be pornographic.  Somehow, they thought the image I'd uploaded was one which was posted on a porn blog and I was directed to the page on which the image was supposed to be found.  The porn pictures I found myself looking at weren't particularly sexy, but regardless, I soon found myself awake in the real world and in need of a change of underwear.  I hadn't surfed porn or fapped on over a month (being in love with my girlfriend had me satisfied enough), but I guess my body wanted back into the old rut again.  So, there was I was, awake at 5AM on December 25th, in the bathroom, washing myself off for having climaxed to a dream in which I was browsing a lame porn blog.  I guess you could say--
 
--that Christmas came early.  YEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!
 
In case it's not explicitly clear, I think something is seriously wrong with me.  I feel like just crashing and sleeping for a week in hopes of recovering what might be left of my sanity, but I fear that I would just be exposed to other strange dreams like the ones I've just ranted about.  Ah well.  I guess I'll just have to get used to it.

Huh. I honestly don't see anything particularly "fucked up" about those dreams. You dream about your girlfriend, your grandma, the rest of your family, and things you've seen. I think that's pretty normal. Sure, the situations you find yourself in in a dream might be unlikely, but that's what your brain does when you're asleep.
 
I've been chased by monsters, fought dragons and even been swallowed by a whale (I still don't know where that one came from).
 
Dreamed I was at a party at my old school, my priest (!) manning the grill, one of my friends catching a fish in a small pool of water, and then put it on the grill (I woke up thinking wtf?).
 
I've been stabbed several times, buried alive (when that's your biggest fear, you wake up in a pool of your own sweat, your heartrate at about 200), been covered with spiders (second biggest fear), drowned, tortured, killed by the devil. That's some messed up shit.
 
My one lucid dream involved me opening my eyes and seeing a whale (again with the damn whale) swimming above me. 
 
I've had sex with beautiful women and sometimes even multiple women (I LOVE those dreams)
 
In the past few years, I've been prone to taking the occasional nap. I usually put on my headphones, load up a random Bombcast and fall asleep to it. That's fine, and I sometimes dream of the GB crew. Latest one: we're sitting in a room somewhere (I think it might be my house), doing the Bombcast. Everyone is there: Brad, Ryan, Jeff, Vinny (no Drew). We're laughing, having a fucking great time. Brad is laughing so hard he's almost choking. Jeff proceeds to leave the room, come back a few minutes later, his hands around a whole roasted chicken (I have no fucking clue why). He sits down and eats it with his hands. I wake up. That is by far the most absurd thing I've dreamed in recent memory. And for some reason, the image of Jeff gorging himself on that chicken makes me burst out in laughter.
 
They're dreams, they're meant to be a bit weird. Don't worry too much about it. The insomnia though, might want to go to a doctor about that. That shit isn't healthy.

Oh wow, there's a Dreams forum...

" Oh wow, there's a Dreams forum... "

After reading that whole thing and then "coming" to the ending (see what I did there?) all I have to say is ... 
 
hahahahaha. Long read but the ending made me laugh. Poor duder having wet dreams.