500 things you have learned playing video games

1. You can heal wounds by grabbing med packs or hiding behind walls.
2. People have such simple brains that they can only repeat one phrase over and over again.

3. Jumping on living creatures will kill them in one jump. A jump and a kick if it was a turtle/tortoise.

4. During cutscene, a small, regular attack does a ton of damage, but in battle, that attack does barely anything.

5. It's possible to knock out enemies, doing cartwheels, while naked, without using your hands.

6. When you die, all you have to do is press a button and you return to 5 seconds ago.

7. We can heal ourselves with medical kits even without medical knowledge

8. In a racing game, there is always an obstacle just over that next hill.

9. When wielding a firearm, a cross floats in midair pointing to where the bullets will hit.

9. All barrels can blow up

10.  Someone see you?  Just hide five feet in front of them.  They'll forget.

12. Whenever you see a good place that overlooks everything, all access will be obstructed by rubble and/or improvised barriers.

13. Playing them means I have a higher chance of dying alone.

14. Teddy bears kill people.

15. It takes one hit from a knife to break a window, and multiple shots from a gun to break the same window.

16. Killing people is wrong, unless you're rolling them up into a ball and creating a new star in the galaxy.

17. Deals with ancient demons are not usually successful.

18. Dead bodies disappear after a short period of time.

19. Important people are immortal

"18. Dead bodies disappear after a short period of time."

21.  Pac-Man is a biography for ravers:  listening to repetitive music, chomping down pills, and chasing ghosts that aren't there.

22. In the future, its possible to pause time, and select a body part of someone/something to shoot at, and some number crunching and die rolls will decide the outcome of your shot hitting or missing, and how much damage was done.

23. Rewinding time can still lead to your doom.

24. People arn`t born, they have spawn points.

25. Sometimes swords do more damage than guns.

26. Clouds are the same as bushes...

27. You can go through light poles and power lines like toothpicks but as soon as you hit a small tree, your stopped dead in your tracks.

28. while playing games you are everything and nothing , every one and no one .

29. You can take several bullets to the face but as long you just sit down for a bit, you'll be fine.

31. You get stronger every time you kill someone.

32. Princesses need to ramp up their security forces.

33. Medicine became obsolete about 5 years ago when we evolved the ability to regenerate.
34. Being shot in the face is a minor inconvenience
35. There is always something hidden behind the waterfall
36. Guards are extremely forgetful
37. You can make anything from food, wood and gold

38. If you eat someone, you gain their greatest ability.

39. Looking through infra-red, someone's body will be warm long, long after they have died.

40. Do not trust little girls when you can not see their faces, they will inevitably lead you through abandoned areas with blood spattered walls.
41. Duke Nukem is awesome.
42. In the future, if any space invaders do indeed arrive, aim for where they will be and NOT where they currently are.
43. Hedgehogs are fast as hell.

40. Do not trust little girls when you can not see their faces, they will inevitably lead you through abandoned areas with blood spattered walls.
41. Duke Nukem is awesome.
42. In the future, if any space invaders do indeed arrive, aim for where they will be and NOT where they currently are.
43. Hedgehogs are fast as hell.

44. The best way to get girls, save the day, and epitomize greatness? Never say a single word, ever.

46. When God grows tired of watching the minutia of your daily life he will seal you in by removing all doors (But will leave windows, as if to taunt you), place many fireplaces around the enclosed space and fill it up with wooden objects. Then God waits.

47. The limits of gravity can and will be defied.

48. Glitches are not on purpose

49. You can carry rocket launchers in your pocket.

50. Never go and save a princess, it is pointless.

51. Don't fuck with trees of any shape or size while in a vehicle.

51. If you make a mistake then just reload your last save file.

52. There is ammo EVERYWHERE.

Two 51's there.^^

54. You can revive a party member/teammate if they were killed in battle, but can't revive them if they were killed during a cutscene.
55. When armor is needed, women do not need to cover their nether regions, but men do.

56. Killing puppies is fine, but killing children is not

57. Invaders come from SPAAAACE

58. Rez is nothing but an elaborate sex toy.

59. Sniper rifles, and their accuracy, are almost completely immune to the elements.

60) The cake is a lie!

61. I can raise my allies from the dead to fight again. Just don't expect any type of reciprocation =/ .