Since I managed to write down everything I played this year for who knows what reason, and also because I'm partial to bandwagons, I figured I should make one of these. Well, not "should" per se. Maybe possibly get around to perhaps writing something about it, maybe. So with that level of commitment in mind, here are some vidya I thought were pretty okay.
Best Game Played in 2010 Actually Released in 2009 Which I Waited to Buy Because I'm Cheap
Nominees: Assassin's Creed 2, Uncharted 2, Borderlands, InFamous, Dragon Age: Origins Winner: Uncharted 2
Pretty much the biggest gaming-related event of the year for me technically happened a few days before 2010 actually started: Buying a PS3. The first several months of 2010 were spent playing catch-up, starting with what's often touted as the best PS3 game yet (followed eventually by the second best, InFamous). I'm certainly not disagreeing with the vox populi on this one.
Best Game Played in 2010 Actually Released Long Before 2009 Which I Waited to Play Because Backlogs, Dammit
Nominees: Folklore, Paper Mario, Yakuza, Blood Will Tell, Condemned 2 Winner: Paper Mario
The Backlog pick of this year was undoubtedly the original Paper Mario for N64. Having played its sequel and its semi-sequel, I really wasn't expecting anything beyond simply a less polished version of either, but the sheer depth (in a world defined by its lack of depth) pleasantly surprised me. This shit was released in 2001, people, and it still stands up. I mean, so do a lot of SNES games too but you get my belaboured point. Damn kids today and their Spirograph and Chachi.
Weirdest F-ing Game Played This Year
Nominees: Drakengard, Nier, Bayonetta, Blood Will Tell, Little King's Story Winner: Drakengard
Goddammit, what was wrong with the people behind this game? Giant demon babies? A cannibal who only eats children? A blind pedophile? The love interest being your sister? This game has five endings, and the world is destroyed by a thousand hideous mutated monsters in the second ending. The next three get progressively worse. Japan apparently still has capital punishment (hopefully involving katanas), so I guess they have no lack of Death Row inmates to write this shit. NB: THIS AWARD IS NOT A RECOMMENDATION. GOOD GRAVY, NO.
"Game, I Am Disappoint" Award For Most Disappointing Game
Nominees: Bioshock 2, Crackdown 2, White Knight Chronicles, Final Fantasy Crystal Chronicles: Crystal Bearers, Hexyz Force Winner: White Knight Chronicles
Slightly unfair, probably, but White Knight Chronicles stands out as the game I was most disappointed with, simply because I expect so much from Level-5 at this point. Both Dark Cloud 2 and Rogue Galaxy were huge, sweeping games with oodles of options and side-games backing up what was, admittedly, a slight dungeon crawling experience. Not only does WKC lack any kind of secondary objectives (unless farming for rare items is somehow captivating for you), but it hides the grand majority of what's available behind its MMORPG mode, which was clearly intended to be the focus all along. Stealth MMORPGs in general annoy me. But this one carried the extra stingray barb of fanboy betrayal and man, is it ever insensitive that I used "stingray barb" in that metaphor. I mean... it's painful, that's what I mean.
Best Appearance in a 2010 Video Game By an Actor Moonlighting From NBC's Chuck (But Not ABC's Moonlighting)
Nominees: Yvonne Strahovski (Mass Effect 2), Adam Baldwin (Mass Effect 2), Zachary Levi (Fallout: New Vegas) Winner: Yvonne Strahovski ("Miranda Lawson")
Chuck is ten minutes of amusing nerd references and slapstick wrapped in 30 minutes of dull spy plots and slushy indie song montages, so if anything I'm just a casual watcher. However, two remarkable things about this show - very nerd fandom-friendly and that it's always on the brink of cancellation - meant several sightings of its core actors supplementing their income in a couple of the biggest RPGs of the year. With Ms Strahovski playing asskicking eyecandy, Mr Baldwin as a sardonic marine and Mr Levi as a sarcastic nerd with limited martial ability, they were clearly trying out new things. Miranda Lawson (Strahovski's Mass Effect 2 character) was by far the best developed though, and since I'm a big ol' chauvinist and she's hot, she gets the award. This year anyway. Joshua Gomez is totally winning next year if they make Wendy's Ranch Tooth an IP.
Best Transparent Bioshock Rehash of 2010
Nominees: Bioshock 2, Singularity Winner: Singularity
Yep.
Best Giant Bomb QL Moment
Nominees: Ryan and Vinny vs. Ragdoll Physics (Wipeout: The Game), Frakes Face (Multimedia Celebrity Poker), Any All-Intellivision Game Room (Game Room), "RIDER MEET HORSE, HORSE MEET RIDER" (Motion Sports), "Oh you know what? I did name our guy 'Pig Sticker'..." (Farming Simulator 2011) Winner: Frakes Face (Multimedia Celebrity Poker)
I was worried I wouldn't be able to remember at least five awesome QL moments that didn't happen in the last couple of months. Then Frakes Face happened and that neatly wrapped that problem up. I don't think poor Vinny will ever be the same again. Always Be Raising Video Quality.
Best Babby Game on a Babby Console For Babbies
Nominees: Super Mario Galaxy 2, Picross 3D, FFCC: Crystal Bearers, No More Heroes 2, Ace Attorney Investigations: Miles EdgeworthWinner: Super Mario Galaxy 2
I.e. Best game on a Nintendo console. I paid my dues to the Big N this year with several Wii and DS titles, not all of which were particularly awesome and the actual best (Little King's Story) actually a 2009 release. But there was still plenty on offer and the Wii gets a reprieve for another year before it meets with a cupboard drawer and/or a classified on Craigslist. Super Mario Galaxy 2 loses points for being a cookie-cutter sequel, which it then immediately makes up for by being a cookie-cutter sequel to Super Mario Galaxy. Funny how that works.
Best Downloadable Game of 2010
Nominees: VVVVVV, Recettear: An Item Shop's Tale, Costume Quest, Lara Croft: Guardian of Light, Beat Hazard Winner: Recettear: An Item Shop's Tale
Generally I don't hang around the downloadable stables, since most of my gametime is spent on retail games I rent for free due to a envy-inspired secret arrangement (basically, Tesco sends me free rental vouchers occasionally). It's no GameFly, but then there is no GameFly over here. However, because of the Black Friday Steam sales and a way-more-aggressive-in-my-head "get this before Halloween" ad campaign for Double Fine's otherwise excellent Costume Quest, I found myself with an abundance of these miniature beauties. The winner is Recettear, which turned out to be far larger than I expected for 1/5 of a £4 Steam game pack. It's also in my favorite genre ever: the Dungeon-Crawler Hybrid. So yeah, accolades aplenty for it and the other four nominations.
Best Overall Game of 2010
Nominees: Super Mario Galaxy 2, Mass Effect 2, Red Dead Redemption, Vanquish, Assassin's Creed Brotherhood, Fallout: New Vegas Winner: Mass Effect 2
Vastly improving on your original in almost every possible way (what I call the Pikmin effect) is easy when the original sucked. Mass Effect did not suck. Unless you really hate elevators or batshit tank physics, Mass Effect was the new gold standard when it came to Sci-Fi RPGs and had the monumental task of being even better next time around. Thankfully, that happened, and we were given 2010's game of the year. Don't let it go to your heads, Bioware (though do feel free to make Mass Effect 3 even better).
Man, I should totally add an Elcor to that "Poker Night at the Inventory" list I made. Talk about a poker face. Assuming they don't go "(Surreptitiously Bluffing) I am going to raise." Because they totally might do that if they were completely stupid. Only I guess poker in the Mass Effect universe is called Pazaak-Jot or something and requires holograms and a neural implant. I'm rambling now. See you next year.
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