I kinda feel we've also reached an inflection point with the internet and the people who use it. Someone born the day the Xbox 360 came out will be 15 this year, they've never known a world without everything and almost everyone being connected to the internet to the point where the notion you're discussing video games with people is so normalized. Growing up having a larger group of people to discuss video games with on the internet was always an eye opening experience, and at least personally I always felt keenly aware it was another person on the end of that connection.
I agree 1000% that discourse has absolutely changed, it's not necessarily that everyone is an arm chair expert it's that; "I've been playing games my whole life so X" can mean a lot of different things and indicate a lot of wildly different levels of experience. Look at the discussions surrounding singleplayer games that EA made, lootboxes in r/gaming or any discussion of "SJW" type behavior at N4G, none of that will go well if you don't tow a very specific view point.
"Oh you enjoy Battlefield or Call of Duty? Well MP games are for casuals you're ruining MY hobby and have you played this unknown game called The Witcher 3?"
"Oh you dont have an almost violent opposition to lootboxes if they're done right and very optional? Well you're ruining my hobby!!!"
"Oh you dont think female soldiers in BFV are virtue signaling, retelling of history?! Well you're ruining my power fantasy and ruining my hobby!!!"
We've all experienced these comments in one way or another. While I believe they're wrong, I also have to believe most of these people are kids with either narrow viewpoints or narrow context when it comes to games. Your example of someone's summation of JRPGs makes a tonne of sense if you've only seen JRPGs from the last 10 years. If I was born in 2003 maybe I would feel differently about representation of games, not having the context of the 90s gaming culture would probably change my mindset a lot.
So I dont know bro, I just stopped discussing games with people online. Conversations about games in person are generally far more relaxed and easy going with the benefit of knowing who you're talking with.
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