How old were you when your parents gave you "...the talk"

You know, where do babies come from and how are they born etc, did they use silly analogies or funny examples?

My parents told me that god decided when I (and all babies) had to be born, they told me I was a marvelous miracle and a beautiful son of God or something like that

", where do babies come from "

My talk came after they figured I was screwing some chick.
It was basically.

"Hey, do you need some money for condoms?"
"What? No."
"Oh okay, I just don't want you to get anyone pregnant, you know how it all works right?"
*Me laughing my ass off for fifteen minutes while nodding*
 "I really don't want to have grandchildren just yet."
*Me still laughing my ass off*
*Mom leaves*

This was sometime earlier this year, clueless parents are terrific.

I never had the talk, i learned all i needed to learn from the internet. And i also learned a few things i didn't want to >_>

EDIT: eh...that didn't come out right, let's just say my teacher taught me.

"I never had the talk, i learned all i needed to learn from the internet"

I found out when I  found my pops old vintage porn

"a marvelous miracle and a beautiful son of God "

Didn't get the talk, but some kid in the second grade told me that penis and vagina makes babies.

unfortunately, I still get it every now and then, my dad will start talking about sex when ever I'm drving. >_________________>

"I found out when I  found my pops old vintage porn"

"My talk came after they figured I was screwing some chick.
It was basically.

"Hey, do you need some money for condoms?"
"What? No."
"Oh okay, I just don't want you to get anyone pregnant, you know how it all works right?"
*Me laughing my ass off for fifteen minutes while nodding*
 "I really don't want to have grandchildren just yet."
*Me still laughing my ass off*
*Mom leaves*

This was sometime earlier this year, clueless parents are terrific."

"Black_Rose said:

"I never had the talk, i learned all i needed to learn from the internet"

"

"unfortunately, I still get it every now and then, my dad will start talking about sex when ever I'm drving. >_________________>"

I THOUGHT YOU WERE A LADY DUALREAVER!!! MY HOPES ARE SMASHED!"

"unfortunately, I still get it every now and then, my dad will start talking about sex when ever I'm drving. "

"Clean said:

"I found out when I  found my pops old vintage porn"

Seriously though, me too. Horse on clown mags were wierd but they explained a lot of shit."

"clubsandwich said:

"unfortunately, I still get it every now and then, my dad will start talking about sex when ever I'm drving. "

Road head is never unfortunate."

I remember going to sex ed and putting a condomn on a bannana showing how manly i put it on. Those were the days.......

Thanks for reminding me of the most unconfertable and okward moments of my life.
Really, thanks.

..... asshole

"Thanks for reminding me of the most unconfertable and okward moments of my life.
Really, thanks.

..... asshole"

Never got the talk.  They just figured I knew mostly everything from sex ed. 

im pretty sure i figured it out on my own as my dad is kinda like al bundy sometimes (LOL) and he has a dirty sense of humor. slowly i figured out all his jokes and by the time i was old to where boys start liking girls and stuff i would be the kid always explaining things to other kids. like nah dude, you don't PEE in her! lol remember when you were young and we would think that!

Pot smoking towel >:("

I never had the talk, i just picked it up along the way... wasnt too hard.

I never got this "talk" that you speak of...and no, I don't want/need it from you.

I've never got the talk. I learned almost everything from the internet. 

I never received the talk, I learned it on my own. Yeah, how shocking.

I never had "The Talk". I learned about sex in sex education at school. And once I was old enough to possibly consider sex my mum would just shout "CONDOMS" at me at every possible opportunity. She still does it now, and I'm 19.

i didn't get the talk... i just got have you got... hairs yet? *laughs manically* form ym mum when i was like 12

"clubsandwich said:

"unfortunately, I still get it every now and then, my dad will start talking about sex when ever I'm drving. "

Road head is never unfortunate."

I never really got "the talk". Information about sex came from hearing things from kids who knew more and sex ed.

The summer before I started middle school I asked my parents when I saw coach carter how a non married woman could be pregnant they shurgged it off. Later that summer I asked my dad if something was wrong with me because my penis was really stiff, and he said he had a book about it for me, and I read it, but I really started enjoying it, and it taught me how to jack...
Never mind...
Before that I was told God gave woman their babies, and that I was a gift that they prayed for.

i learned to fap by accident

"clubsandwich said:

"unfortunately, I still get it every now and then, my dad will start talking about sex when ever I'm drving. "

Road head is never unfortunate."

My dad basically said "what do you know" in like 2nd grade, I told him, he gave me some basic scientific facts, told me that the choice would be mine to make when I am in High School, said I'd learn more later.

Yep.

Never, I just went into the  hole and made a discovery

They didn't. My brother told me when I was 5 years old....

:O

"i learned to fap by accident"

"The summer before I started middle school I asked my parents when I saw coach carter how a non married woman could be pregnant they shurgged it off. Later that summer I asked my dad if something was wrong with me because my penis was really stiff, and he said he had a book about it for me, and I read it, but I really started enjoying it, and it taught me how to jack...
Never mind...
Before that I was told God gave woman their babies, and that I was a gift that they prayed for."

I never had the talk. I learned everything from Sex Ed class in school.

never had the talk, if u did i really feel sorry for u

Parents never taught me anything.  Sex ed taught my fake information in school, which is pretty bad.  I learned it on my own.

I kept asking my mom where babies come from... over, and over, and over. Finally, frustrated, she said, "The Asshole". I was like 10 and for two years, I thought I was an asshole baby.

I never got that talk I learned from some kids older then me.

I was taught it by the school nurse in Sex Ed. Oh, how immature I once was, giggling when she said "penis".


So glad I don't laugh at that word...as much.

My parents didn't help me with that at all.

Never, I found out for myself, I was like WTF is this shit coming outta my penis!

Now my mom talks to me about her sex life............ya its  a lil werid, im 21 though I can handle it abit

I didn't get the talk, I think my parents just realized that I knew everything at a point and didn't feel the need to have that conversation.