Need your guys opinion on something.

The kind of women who fall for pickup artists are not the kind of women you want for a relationship. Im sure those are great tips for hooking up, if that butters yoir biscuit.

Glitter and pop rocks.

@DuskVamp said:

Not meaning to be bitchy, but is this actually supposed to be serious??

Aren't you dating someone you met on Giantbomb? If that is in fact you, then I don't think you should be judging anyone.

Ahh the curse of the shy male. I'm in the same boat, but I've never turned to pick-up lines or self-help books, mostly just because I'm not that socially motivated; I'm too much of an introvert for that.

Plus, evolution gave me perfectly working hands, and the internet gave me perfectly working pornography.

@Trainer_Red said:

@DuskVamp said:

Not meaning to be bitchy, but is this actually supposed to be serious??

Aren't you dating someone you met on Giantbomb? If that is in fact you, then I don't think you should be judging anyone.

I'm not judging him, I was simply asking if this is a real situation and not a troll poking fun at relationship threads and relationship self help books, I'd never heard of "pick up artist" books and forums.

@Trainer_Red said:

@DuskVamp said:

Not meaning to be bitchy, but is this actually supposed to be serious??

Aren't you dating someone you met on Giantbomb? If that is in fact you, then I don't think you should be judging anyone.

I'm not judging him, I was simply asking if this is a real situation and not a troll poking fun at relationship threads and relationship self help books, I'd never heard of "pick up artist" books and forums.

@Sinusoidal said:

@pyromagnestir said:

@Sinusoidal

Whatever you do, DO NOT tell her you asked for advice on talking to her on a video game forum.

But that's my 3rd best opening line! Man...

You know what? It might actually work on the right lady. Hell, it's as honest as it's possible to be.

Actually, since I've never actually sought advice for talking to girls on a video game forum I'm being dishonest as hell when I use that one...

An honest opening line from me would be more along the lines of "Hi. I'm an unemployed, lazy, directionless oaf. And I'm lousy in bed. And you are?" Which just so happens to be my number 4 opening line.

@Spoonman671: I live in the UK and have basic TV so unfortunately that passed by me. But I can see why "Mystery" gets all the girls...

I don't know if right now I am looking for a relationship or not. I just want to go out and have fun...with women.

Also, I really hate half the comments in this thread. Of no help what so ever they are.

@Raven_Sword said:

I don't know if right now I am looking for a relationship or not. I just want to go out and have fun...with women.

Then stop thinking them as goals or prizes and start thinking of them as people. You won't have any success with women unless you have some worth yourself or something to offer them or that you can provide for them. If you have nothing to offer as a suitor, then why would they want to be with you? If you can't think of anything you can offer a woman, start with your confidence. After that, start making yourself a worthwhile suitor. It's really simple when you break it down.

Can you offer them attraction? No? Get in shape.

Can you offer them financial stability? No? Get a better job.

Can you offer them a sense of safety and intimacy that can't be fulfilled as a male friend? No? Then work on your charm and social skills.

Sure, it's easy to just say "be better", but to get the women you want, you have to be the man they want. Most guys think they should have any woman they want just because they want them, and it doesn't work like that. Women are looking for the same things in their "hook-ups" as well, although the ratio skews even further towards physical attractiveness or charm in those cases.

If you're looking at Pick Up Artist stuff, you don't really care. You're just looking for an easy out, a way to "game" the system. You're like someone who wants to be rich but goes about it by buying lotto tickets, or someone who wants to lose weight and keeps buying "weight loss pills" off of the television. The solutions are in front of you, but you don't have the willpower to do what you need to do. You want it to be given to you.

Hey, only half. By Internet standards you're doing awesome.

Maybe you are having trouble talking about something? then try to pick up things that women might like. A number of girls i know as friends are super into Walking dead, before that it was Lost. Maybe pick up something u deemed a little feminine? But honestly u have to be somewhat interested in whatever you pick up. this way, if you are blanking on a topic, u can ask " watching any good shows lately" and if u hit a target, then boom. On the other hand if u dont watch whatever she is watching, u can pick something she mentioned u might find interesting and ask about it. Be yourself thru this and just act natural. After that, i got nothing for u.

Well, I honestly think I can learn something from these books I'm reading. I'm not trying to game any system. I'm trying to build my confidence, self worth, and assertiveness. I'm not looking to do scripted stuff or whatever. I just have no idea what to do. Nothing's working. I'm not looking to be a "player" I just want to have the charisma, charm, and confidence to attract women. And I don't know where else to learn this other than from books or videos or forums. I don't want to be a " pick up artist" but some characteristic of them are probaly worth emulating. Like being a alpha male, being confident, embarrassing your sexual nature, you know, things like that.

@Raven_Sword said:

Well, I honestly think I can learn something from these books I'm reading. I'm not trying to game any system. I'm trying to build my confidence, self worth, and assertiveness. I'm not looking to do scripted stuff or whatever. I just have no idea what to do. Nothing's working. I'm not looking to be a "player" I just want to have the charisma, charm, and confidence to attract women. And I don't know where else to learn this other than from books or videos or forums. I don't want to be a " pick up artist" but some characteristic of them are probaly worth emulating. Like being a alpha male, being confident, embarrassing your sexual nature, you know, things like that.

If you're stuck in this "alpha" mindset, you've already lost. Instead of focusing on competition with other guys, work on improving yourself.

Otherwise, consult Wikipedia:

Alphas may achieve their status by means of superior physical prowess and/or through social efforts and building alliances within the group.

The position of alpha also changes in some species, usually through a physical fight between a dominate and subordinate animal. Such fights may or may not be to the death, with relevant behavior varying between circumstance and species.

So I guess act like your life is a reality show, and beat up or kill anyone better than you to prove your dominance.

Develop confidence, focus on honesty, have a way with words, and if you're funny, take advantage of it. If things don't work out between you and a girl, move on.

Well, I honestly think I can learn something from these books I'm reading. I'm not trying to game any system. I'm trying to build my confidence, self worth, and assertiveness. I'm not looking to do scripted stuff or whatever. I just have no idea what to do. Nothing's working. I'm not looking to be a "player" I just want to have the charisma, charm, and confidence to attract women. And I don't know where else to learn this other than from books or videos or forums. I don't want to be a " pick up artist" but some characteristic of them are probaly worth emulating. Like being a alpha male, being confident, embarrassing your sexual nature, you know, things like that.

@Raven_Sword said:

Well, I honestly think I can learn something from these books I'm reading. I'm not trying to game any system. I'm trying to build my confidence, self worth, and assertiveness. I'm not looking to do scripted stuff or whatever. I just have no idea what to do. Nothing's working. I'm not looking to be a "player" I just want to have the charisma, charm, and confidence to attract women. And I don't know where else to learn this other than from books or videos or forums. I don't want to be a " pick up artist" but some characteristic of them are probaly worth emulating. Like being a alpha male, being confident, embarrassing your sexual nature, you know, things like that.

Just be yourself then, that's the best way to build up your confidence. You will naturally build up 'charisma' by learning how to talk to people, so that means you have to go out and do it. There is no magic bullet.

As every image shared on Facebook says it:
 
BElieve inYOUR-fucking-SELF

Glad I don't ever have to worry about this sort of thing.

As for advice, stop the self help books. Be more outgoing, and then maybe you'll find someone.

I'm not stuck on alpha male mindset. I am not doing this to prove myself to anyone, I'm doing this to improve myself. I think a lot of people are misconstruing what I mean quite honestly. All I want to do is be more confidant, more out going, more communicative, more taking risks with interactions, and things like that. But everyone here seems to think I'm trying to be a player or whatever, and they are COMPLETELY missing the underline point of what I'm trying to do. Maybe its my fault for posing this in avideo game forum, but it is offtopic. Reading self help books isn't a crutch. I don't see why people think it is. It's easy to say "just be yourself!" But a lot if times not everything about yourself is the best. Humans are in constant states of improvement and froth. We all learn from others when we don't know something.

DO NOT USE THOSE GODDAMN PUA BULLSHIT BOOKS.

Gym 4 times a week. Haircut once a month (or every two months). Get clothes that fit you; if you need help with that, be honest. Go to Express (or pick your store) and find a friendly looking salesperson and tell them you would like some recommendations. Learn and practice good posture. If you have confidence issues, try a psychologist.

Within 3 months of practicing the above, you will not need those bullshit pickupartist books. To talk to women, treat them as humans, not specifically women. How would you strike up conversation with another guy? For example, if you're waiting for a table at a restaurant at a bar, ask the person next to you how long THEY'VE been waiting (in a nice fashion). "Hey, so how long have you been waiting?" You can continue if they seem interested, or stop if they don't. Don't take it personally if they do not seem interested!

If you need help meeting people, sign up for Habitat for Humanity, or try MeetUp.com. People at Habitat are usually very nice and it's a great way to meet people.

@Raven_Sword said:

I'm not stuck on alpha male mindset. I am not doing this to prove myself to anyone, I'm doing this to improve myself. I think a lot of people are misconstruing what I mean quite honestly. All I want to do is be more confidant, more out going, more communicative, more taking risks with interactions, and things like that. But everyone here seems to think I'm trying to be a player or whatever, and they are COMPLETELY missing the underline point of what I'm trying to do. Maybe its my fault for posing this in avideo game forum, but it is offtopic. Reading self help books isn't a crutch. I don't see why people think it is. It's easy to say "just be yourself!" But a lot if times not everything about yourself is the best. Humans are in constant states of improvement and froth. We all learn from others when we don't know something.

Self-help books are fine, but NOT PUA books. Try "The Power of Now" by Eckhart Tolle. Trust me. You will pick up bad habits and techniques from the PUA books regardless of if you try not to. Women will pick up on this. WOMEN DO NOT LIKE BEING "PICKED UP," they like making connections, just like any other human. If your self is not the best, then change your self. Not fake it, change it. Find other interests (books, sports, activities.. rockclimbing, disc golf, you name it) that YOU would enjoy, try things until you find something that surprises you. You need to be happy alone before you can be happy with someone else.

@murisan said:

@Raven_Sword said:

I'm not stuck on alpha male mindset. I am not doing this to prove myself to anyone, I'm doing this to improve myself. I think a lot of people are misconstruing what I mean quite honestly. All I want to do is be more confidant, more out going, more communicative, more taking risks with interactions, and things like that. But everyone here seems to think I'm trying to be a player or whatever, and they are COMPLETELY missing the underline point of what I'm trying to do. Maybe its my fault for posing this in avideo game forum, but it is offtopic. Reading self help books isn't a crutch. I don't see why people think it is. It's easy to say "just be yourself!" But a lot if times not everything about yourself is the best. Humans are in constant states of improvement and froth. We all learn from others when we don't know something.

Self-help books are fine, but NOT PUA books. Try "The Power of Now" by Eckhart Tolle. Trust me. You will pick up bad habits and techniques from the PUA books regardless of if you try not to. Women will pick up on this. WOMEN DO NOT LIKE BEING "PICKED UP," they like making connections, just like any other human. If your self is not the best, then change your self. Not fake it, change it. Find other interests (books, sports, activities.. rockclimbing, disc golf, you name it) that YOU would enjoy, try things until you find something that surprises you. You need to be happy alone before you can be happy with someone else.

This. People are misconstruing your intentions because of the sources you are seeking information and "confidence" from. There's nothing confident about the PUA guys. They lack confidence, and learned to fake it and gained a sense of false confidence from their "game". If you read the original PUA book, The Game, you would've seen that it was all a facade of confidence that collapsed around them.

Improve yourself by working on your confidence, your appearance, and your social skills. Be a better person, and you'll get better women. Don't try to follow the PUA advice on how to woo women. It's false, and most women know those tricks, and they are tricks, by now.

A lot of people will give you a lot of different self improvement advice - a lot of it is good for you and they're at least worth a consideration, but there's a critical secret that not a lot of people know.

The secret? Ask. Go up to a hot girl and just start talking; introduce yourself, compliment her looks. Ask if she has a boyfriend. Ask for her phone number to talk/meet later.

Let face it - if it's a hot girl, the chance of her currently being single is slim. Then the chance of her agreeing to go out with you, even slimmer. The chance of her falling in love with you at first sight and making the first move? Pretty much 0%. So since you're playing against the odds, lets at least try to improve those odds as much as possible. And that is to ask every girl you like at every chance you get. If you only have a 1% chance of getting with a hot girl, that just means you have to ask at least a hundred hot girls.

As you ask and ask, then fail and fail, you'll grow a tougher skin to not dwell on those rejections. Eventually you'll hit jackpot and after that it's easy as you'll learn to enjoy the thrill of the hunt. You'll realize being rejected is nothing personal, they simply didn't feel 'the spark' and there's nothing anyone can do about that.

A lot of guys out there might become a little depressed when a hot chick walks in the room; secretly they're thinking 'I have no chance in hell to get with her'. You should actually be feeling excited, to be given a chance to talk to a hot girl. Your enthusiasm and confidence will not go unnoticed. You'll also learn to enjoy just chatting up a girl even after finding out she's unavailable, and possibly make a new friend. And having a girl as a friend is beneficial indeed, as she's likely to talk well about you to her friends.

To sum it up; wear confidence like a jacket and whether you win or loss, remember the important thing is to have fun.

Cocaine. Lots and lots of cocaine. Just snort that shit and let the spirit of the tiger carry you to victory.

@Raven_Sword said:

Ok, so lately ive been reading alot of self help books on dating and attracting women and stuff. Im really trying to get this part of my life fixed and solved, so im pretty much turning to books and forums (PUA forum.com) to try to get advice, guidance, and etc. However, i dont know if these books and advice are BS or not. Alot of these books are by Pick up Artists. PUA.com is a Pick up Artist Forum. Now, I know Pick up artist has a sleezy stigma tied to it, but I think alot of info could be useful. and there the ones getting women, so theres that as well. I dont know. Clearly what I am doing now isnt working, so really anything will be better than where im at right now. What do you guys think? I dont wanna be some asshole jerk, but im tired of feeling like some Beta bitch people take advantage of and cant attract women.

Those books are more or less useless. A lot of them are common sense and felt like to that me, after reading 2 of them. Online dating is probably your best bet to get you comfortable, it worked out for me. I have no idea what you look like, but clothes do make the man. Switching from Metal band t-shirts to nice fitted clothes made me more comfortable and more approachable, I've had women approach me on a good few occasions; even led to a short relationship after being approached at a concert.

I am unsure where you live but OkCupid.com and PlentyOfFish are two free online dating sites, and are utilized by a lot of young people (18-early 30s). My girlfriend was the one who sent the first message, we've been together for 14 months. If you are looking for someone to review your profile, Reddit.com/r/okcupid is a great place; or you can even ask me. I've helped a handful of friends improve their profiles.

Also BE YOURSELF, don't lie to yourself or her. Those Pick Up Artists things are aimed at hooking up and not a relationship, if you are just looking for sex; go to a bar and use those techniques.

Best of luck. Feel free to PM me any questions you may have.

If you want a relationship with somebody, very hard to just go to a bar and start a successful one, I would recommend maybe asking friends or family to introduce you to someone with similar tastes or ideals. Aside from that maybe join a club and meet people that way.

I'm mainly looking to talk to women and have fun. I'm not sure if I'm looking for a relationship right away. If you want me to be honest, right now I'm kinda looking to hookup and get that out of my system. That way i have no laments when i eventualy find the one i want s relationship with. I'm being honest.

Go get a prostitute. If you just want a hookup, why not go to a professional instead of some slapdash amateur?

@Raven_Sword said:

I'm mainly looking to talk to women and have fun. I'm not sure if I'm looking for a relationship right away. If you want me to be honest, right now I'm kinda looking to hookup and get that out of my system. That way i have no laments when i eventualy find the one i want s relationship with. I'm being honest.

You don't need any tricks for that.

Go to bar/club/Craig's List

Insert alcohol

Ask someone to bone

Someone, anyone, will be down.

Become rockstar, have pussy. Well, that's my plan anyway.

What's wrong with wanting to live up my younger years. Really I don't see anything wrong with wanting to meet as many women as I can and have fun.

Talk to them like people. Be interesting enough that you're not bored with yourself. Don't only want to get to know women for "the fuckin'".

It's that simple, really. If there's something you're embarrassed about, fix it, and if it can't be fixed, then you probably shouldn't be embarrassed about it.

Gym, dude. Seriously, you start working out, you are gonna feel better about yourself (And it'll affect your personality outside of the gym, making you more confident). Believe me, ever since I broke my arm and can't work out, my confidence took a hit. But, now I'm at physical therapy and working my way back up. Best advice I can give. Because no matter what personality you have (Unless you are a serial killer or something) some girl out there is gonna like it.

@Raven_Sword said:

Well, I honestly think I can learn something from these books I'm reading. I'm not trying to game any system. I'm trying to build my confidence, self worth, and assertiveness. I'm not looking to do scripted stuff or whatever. I just have no idea what to do. Nothing's working. I'm not looking to be a "player" I just want to have the charisma, charm, and confidence to attract women. And I don't know where else to learn this other than from books or videos or forums. I don't want to be a " pick up artist" but some characteristic of them are probaly worth emulating. Like being a alpha male, being confident, embarrassing your sexual nature, you know, things like that.

Sorry man i think you've played to many RPGs you know that reading books doesn't actually give +1 charisma right?

Also that new giant bomb girl advice line picture is awesome.

@Joeybagad0nutz said:

Gym, dude. Seriously, you start working out, you are gonna feel better about yourself (And it'll affect your personality outside of the gym, making you more confident). Believe me, ever since I broke my arm and can't work out, my confidence took a hit. But, now I'm at physical therapy and working my way back up. Best advice I can give. Because no matter what personality you have (Unless you are a serial killer or something) some girl out there is gonna like it.

You underestimate the sex appeal of serial killers. Seriously, those dudes get marriage proposals and naked pictures sent to them in prison.

@Raven_Sword said:

What's wrong with wanting to live up my younger years. Really I don't see anything wrong with wanting to meet as many women as I can and have fun.

Nothing is wrong with that.

But you're going about it in the wrong way if you're trying to learn anything from pick up artists books. It's kinda/sorta like if you had a beat up piece of shit car that guzzled gas and made horrible noises that cars shouldn't make, and your method of fixing it was to give it some rims, a kick ass sounds system and paint some lightning bolts on the sides. Your going about this ass backwards. If you want to have fun and be around women, don't try to find the women first and then have fun, the first thing you should do is have some fucking fun and then maybe find some women who want to join you. Women like fun! If you're having fun they'll want to join you! Sure, not all of them will, but there will be some! And what do you do once they join you, you ask? Keep having fun!

And of course, it should go without saying that this doesn't work if you're having fun in a place with no women, so you should find a place where there are women.

And I still want to know what the fuck embarrassing your sexual nature means.

Just go touch some goddamn shoulders. It's not that hard.

Huh. I'm learning some things here, one problem. I'm not popular at all. I have a low self-esteem,ADD and anxiety so you people think i could just walk up to a girl and say "hey" and things will work from there? (i'm not expecting you guys to be miracle workers just a question is all)

@MonkeyMitcho said:

Huh. I'm learning some things here, one problem. I'm not popular at all. I have a low self-esteem,ADD and anxiety so you people think i could just walk up to a girl and say "hey" and things will work from there? (i'm not expecting you guys to be miracle workers just a question is all)

I think you should work on those issues first. Easier said than done, I know, but yeah. Get your ADD and anxiety in check through medication or therapy, and then put yourself in situations out of your comfort zone with other people, guys and girls. The more you do it, the easier it gets. Once you're comfortable in mixed company, yeah, start focusing on girls. It's a long road, but a surefire one.

@Turtlebird95 said:

Just go touch some goddamn shoulders. It's not that hard.

lol kino escalation amirite neg neg neg

Fucked if I know I suck when it comes to teh ladies. Though I do have one tip.

They apparently are not objects... keep that in mind.

@Raven_Sword said:

Ok, so lately ive been reading alot of self help books on dating and attracting women and stuff. Im really trying to get this part of my life fixed and solved, so im pretty much turning to books and forums (PUA forum.com) to try to get advice, guidance, and etc. However, i dont know if these books and advice are BS or not. Alot of these books are by Pick up Artists. PUA.com is a Pick up Artist Forum. Now, I know Pick up artist has a sleezy stigma tied to it, but I think alot of info could be useful. and there the ones getting women, so theres that as well. I dont know. Clearly what I am doing now isnt working, so really anything will be better than where im at right now. What do you guys think? I dont wanna be some asshole jerk, but im tired of feeling like some Beta bitch people take advantage of and cant attract women.

Oh my god, don't ask a pick-up artist forum. Negging is fucking stupid and wins you no favors.

Just get an actual interesting hobby. Failing that, take a yoga class or something. It's really not that difficult, I don't use "pick up artist" tricks and I've had plenty of ladies want me.

Wear a muscle T-Shirt, it makes the pussy go squirt

Not that anyone is going to bother reading this but heres my two cents.

Be yourself. be honest. try to have a little more confidence. the absolute worst that will happen is the chic will say shes not interested and thats it. sure its a little awkward but youll get over it. while im sure this goes without saying but, girls like guys who are good looking. not brad pitt good looking but presentable. wearing dark baggy clothes and having greasy hair isnt a turn on. just clean yourself up a bit. spray on a bit of cologne and brush your teeth. if you can do that and have a little confidence when you talk to them, that LITERALLY like 85% of the work right there.

but again,who cares? no one will read this.

What's wrong with wanting to live up my younger years. Really I don't see anything wrong with wanting to meet as many women as I can and have fun.