Rob Zombie is Remaking "The Blob," but Without the Actual Blob

Source: Variety
 
 Fresh off the debatable success of his remake of Halloween 2, musician-turned-filmmaker Rob Zombie has announced plans to remake The Blob, only without "a big red blobby thing." 

 "My intention is not to have a big red blobby thing, that's the first thing I want to change...That gigantic Jello-looking thing might have been scary to audiences in the 1950s, but people would laugh now. I have a totally different take, one that's pretty dark." 

"I intend to make it scary, and the great thing is, I have the freedom once again to take it in any crazy direction I want to. Even more than Halloween, where I had to deal with accepted iconic characters like Michael Myers and Laurie Strode. The Blob is more concept than specific storyline with characters, so I can go nuts with it."

It's The Blob without the blob? 
 
. . . HE'S A VISIONARY!

 ...............*sigh* (What the hell happened to American horror?) "

Torture porn and endless remakes.  That's what's happened.  No one seems willing or able to come up with a good concept that's new and that doesn't put fetishistic detail into making the victims in the movie suffer through grotesque agony.

I actually liked his work with Halloween, I'm going to see the second one sometime soon. 
I'm sure the Blob would turn out awesome.

To be fair, the first remake from the 80's was a crappy gore flick too, so he can't do any worse than that. :P

His music is great, but this may taint that.

the blob still scares me to this day.  
 
imagine a gigantic blob just going around getting bigger and consuming everything and nothing could stop it?! FUCKING SCARY DUDE!

I havent like anything he has put his name to film wise so far so I think The Blob will be something I'll avoid.

Well he'll have to have some kind of blob. It might not look like jello, maybe it'll be a big hairy 'thing' with lots of legs and mouths, but it'll have to be something.

*sigh* (What the hell happened to American horror?) "

Yay.
 
*cue theme song*
 
Beware of The ..., it creeps
And leaps and glides and slides
Across the floor
Right through the door
And all around the wall
A splotch, a blotch
Be careful of The...umm...what is it again?

I think I'll remake The Birds, but replace the birds with flying zombies.

What next? A remake of Plan 9 from outer space... wait a second, they are remaking it.

Well, hmmm...I don't know what to think of this.  You gotta remember that when The Blob first came out, people were genuinely scared because of that movie.  Therefore, I can see why he would be in the mindset that a giant blob would be more of a laughable thing than a scary thing.  If I were to take a movie that was scary in its time, I would want to make it scary myself.  So I admire that Rob is wanting to keep true to that. 
 
However, taking the big Jello-like creature/thing out of the movie entirely is a bit...hrmm.  However, if we go look at something like John Carpenter's Prince of Darkness...I mean, that stuff in the movie wasn't necessarily a giant Jello-like creature/thing...yet it was still pretty scary watching that flick because you knew it was concentrated evil.  Therefore, he may be thinking of using that kind of idea.  That could totally work out well, so long as he actually made it terrifying. 
 
Audiences nowadays, however, are so desensitized that it's difficult to make a truly scary movie in the horror genre.  You either have the folks that have seen so much gore and blood that it's not going to make any of them freak out when they see someone get their head cut off.  They'll cheer for it instead.  The others who are squeamish of that thing aren't necessarily scared of it - some of them just don't dig seeing it, which is why the PG-13 surge of Japan-to-American remakes hit.  A lot of you folks may not have liked those and even thought they were stupid, but there is an entire audience of people that just don't dig blood and guts.  You can say what you want about them, but seriously - some people just can't handle the sight of blood.  So it's a fine line to try and walk on. 
 
Also, with as much nonsense trash talk that Zombie gets for his take on Halloween...which was damn good...I wonder how many people are even willing to give Rob a chance to make this movie his own.  That's the beautiful thing about what he did with Halloween - he absolutely made it his own.  Whether you liked it or not, that's your thing.  Personally, I felt like he was quite respectful to the tone and darkness of the original as well as respectful to the horror community by not offering them a stupid, campy fuckup. 
 
Also...VIVA LA HALLOWEEN 2!!!  I can't wait! 
 
So...as for Zombie directing The Blob...cool.  Personally, I'm just waiting for September 22nd so I can finally get to see The Haunted World of El Superbeasto!

Fuck you Rob Zombie!

Something going around getting bigger as it consumes?  Rob Zombie/Katamari Damacy crossover confirmed!

It'll probably just be about fat people, and the collective mass of the United Status making up a consciousness called "the Blob."

"*sigh* (What the hell happened to American horror?) "

" It'll probably just be about fat people, and the collective mass of the United Status making up a consciousness called "the Blob." "

" It'll probably just be about fat people, and the collective mass of the United Status making up a consciousness called "the Blob." "

Rob Zombie remaking a classic horror/sci-fi movie? Judging by his recent endeavors (Halloween I and II) that probably will not go too well. But, if he does it like The Devil's Rejects, we can have something neat on our hands. Unfortunately, that was a unique vision and I have a feeling this will fall in the "unoriginal reimagination" (oxymoron there) pit. 
 
@Eirikr said:

" It'll probably just be about fat people, and the collective mass of the United Status making up a consciousness called "the Blob." "

I really like Rob Zombie and I'm always in his corner, rooting. But damn, I wish he could just totally nail it one of these days. So far, not so much.

Truly this is the age of things that shouldn't happen.

 ...............*sigh* (What the hell happened to American horror?) " 

I agree Rob Zombie needs to stay out of movies...he was only a Mildly good musician any ways, as for that with his penchant for cheesy early turn of the century freak shows and horror flicks you'd think blob would be up his alley but its not.

Anyone notice that it said he only wouldn't have THAT blob in it? it sounds to me like he thinks that version was silly, and he's going for a darker version of the blob itself. Just what I thought I read.

" @jakob187: No worries, I'm an American with some fat on me, too. Immunity. I actually think it would be interesting if the concept of obesity could be made into a horror movie. It's certainly relevant! "

" Rob Zombie can go fuck himself, he has the worst vision with any movie he is associated with. He made Michael Myers look like a little bitch, he's ruining classics. "

" @Eirikr said:

" @jakob187: No worries, I'm an American with some fat on me, too. Immunity. I actually think it would be interesting if the concept of obesity could be made into a horror movie. It's certainly relevant! "

Super Size Me - available on DVD today.  ZING!!!
 
@Clean said:

" Rob Zombie can go fuck himself, he has the worst vision with any movie he is associated with. He made Michael Myers look like a little bitch, he's ruining classics. "

Rob Zombie gave a classic horror icon a great backstory.  Also, how did he make him look like a little bitch?  He slit his stepdad's throat after duct taping him to a fucking chair!  He killed a kid in the woods by beating him to death WITH A FUCKING TREE LIMB!!!  Needless to say...that doesn't say "little bitch" to me.  Actually, Zombie specifically has it spoken and written in the script that Michael is simply a force of pure evil incarnate! "

Super Size Me - available on DVD today.  ZING!!!

I'm not really surprised since he's so far made a career of making good horror movies without the good.

  Paulrus, are you implying there were no good American horror films after The Texas Chainsaw Massacre?  
 
Because that would be insane. 
 
I liked Zombie's House/Rejects movies, but 70's nostalgia can only go too far.  It would be nice to have something that represents modern times.     
 
The Halloween remake was absolute rubbish.  Giving Myers a past and motive is missing the point of film entirely, and makes it just another slasher.    
 
Unfortunately Tuggah is 100% spot on.  Marketing to the teenage/college audience killed American horror.  It  made it safe and funny.  Today's horror films are poorly disguised launching pads for the careers of struggling teen TV drama and pop stars.  And the ones that aren't, are either too cowardly to go beyond camp, or don't have the studio support to reach its full potential.   
 
I usually love to play devil's advocate, but I cannot think of a single American horror film in teh past ten years that was original, inspirational, and exciting.  I can think of a few examples that only fill one of those traits (1408, The Blair Witch Project, The Ring) but none that can fill all three. 

" @jakob187 said:

Super Size Me - available on DVD today.  ZING!!!

I was about to refute you when I remembered the satanic-looking Ronald McDonald that's in that movie. Hopefully Zombie can build on that precedent. "

" @Eirikr said:

" @jakob187: No worries, I'm an American with some fat on me, too. Immunity. I actually think it would be interesting if the concept of obesity could be made into a horror movie. It's certainly relevant! "

Super Size Me - available on DVD today.  ZING!!!
 
@Clean said:

" Rob Zombie can go fuck himself, he has the worst vision with any movie he is associated with. He made Michael Myers look like a little bitch, he's ruining classics. "

Rob Zombie gave a classic horror icon a great backstory.  Also, how did he make him look like a little bitch?  He slit his stepdad's throat after duct taping him to a fucking chair!  He killed a kid in the woods by beating him to death WITH A FUCKING TREE LIMB!!!  Needless to say...that doesn't say "little bitch" to me.  Actually, Zombie specifically has it spoken and written in the script that Michael is simply a force of pure evil incarnate! "

I've never seen the original The Blob movie.  Maybe I should go back and check it out.

Rob Zombie should stop making movies.

" . @ZombiePie said:

*sigh* (What the hell happened to American horror?) "

They starting marketing to pre-teens "

I had a rough childhood, but that didn't make me into a serial killer. Rob Zombie made it almost an excuse to why Michael Myers starting killing people...because his mom was a stripper, his dad was an asshole, and his sister was a slut. So he thinks it's okay to start killing people...sounds like a little bitch to me. I will admit he is one evil son of a bitch. "

The quote did not say there would be no blob.  It just stated what it would not look like (the original).  I'm not sure what it would look like in his eyes, but I could see it as more of a symbiote creature, like Venom's black goo, perhaps with a replicating nature.  I don't know.  I'm not going to pre-judge the movie from a three sentence quote or two.

" @Clean said:

I had a rough childhood, but that didn't make me into a serial killer. Rob Zombie made it almost an excuse to why Michael Myers starting killing people...because his mom was a stripper, his dad was an asshole, and his sister was a slut. So he thinks it's okay to start killing people...sounds like a little bitch to me. I will admit he is one evil son of a bitch. "

  THIS^   Also, Rob Zombie should stay the fuck away from classic horror movies,  He took Micheal, gave him a backstory that made him a cunt, and also humanized him to the point that it made the "being un-kill-able" thing even less-believable later in the movie. Seriously, stay away from giving "evil incarnate" a backstory..it just messes shit up.,  even in one "original series" halloween , when they tried to originally explain how he "became evil" it was just dumb and ruined the story.   Oh yeah! i forgot how he took all the suspense out of the original also.. "

"Well, hmmm...I don't know what to think of this.  You gotta remember that when The Blob first came out, people were genuinely scared because of that movie.  Therefore, I can see why he would be in the mindset that a giant blob would be more of a laughable thing than a scary thing.  If I were to take a movie that was scary in its time, I would want to make it scary myself.  So I admire that Rob is wanting to keep true to that. 
 
However, taking the big Jello-like creature/thing out of the movie entirely is a bit...hrmm.  However, if we go look at something like John Carpenter's Prince of Darkness...I mean, that stuff in the movie wasn't necessarily a giant Jello-like creature/thing...yet it was still pretty scary watching that flick because you knew it was concentrated evil.  Therefore, he may be thinking of using that kind of idea.  That could totally work out well, so long as he actually made it terrifying. 
 
Audiences nowadays, however, are so desensitized that it's difficult to make a truly scary movie in the horror genre.  You either have the folks that have seen so much gore and blood that it's not going to make any of them freak out when they see someone get their head cut off.  They'll cheer for it instead.  The others who are squeamish of that thing aren't necessarily scared of it - some of them just don't dig seeing it, which is why the PG-13 surge of Japan-to-American remakes hit.  A lot of you folks may not have liked those and even thought they were stupid, but there is an entire audience of people that just don't dig blood and guts.  You can say what you want about them, but seriously - some people just can't handle the sight of blood.  So it's a fine line to try and walk on. 
 
Also, with as much nonsense trash talk that Zombie gets for his take on Halloween...which was damn good...I wonder how many people are even willing to give Rob a chance to make this movie his own.  That's the beautiful thing about what he did with Halloween - he absolutely made it his own.  Whether you liked it or not, that's your thing.  Personally, I felt like he was quite respectful to the tone and darkness of the original as well as respectful to the horror community by not offering them a stupid, campy fuckup. 
 
Also...VIVA LA HALLOWEEN 2!!!  I can't wait! 
 
So...as for Zombie directing The Blob...cool.  Personally, I'm just waiting for September 22nd so I can finally get to see The Haunted World of El Superbeasto! "

They should hire Drew Carry to play the blob.
 
Heyyyooooo!