Urgent need of help!

So its my friends birthday tomorow and all my friends and I decieded that it would be funny if we bought him a blow up doll for his pressent. But then something terrable happened, some douche told the birthday boy the plan. So our master plan has been ruined and the greatest idea for a pressent of all time has been put to waste. 

Get him a sheep blow up doll (yes they do exist). That will really surprise him.

^ haha
Just don't give him anything and tell him that if he were to die nobody would notice or care

give him a giant potato or a rock or something random , should confuse him  and any one else near by. also act like its the best present ever when giveing it to him

Give him..... a dildo.

Give him some Cheetos. Everybody loves Cheetos. Flamin' Hots too because they are the shit.

Get him better friends. JK. Seriously though, get him a bra.

This:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2J6imNvy25k

Get together some cans of cheap chicken noodle soup, Top Ramen, cat food, gravy mixes, and various other weird, cheap random shit from the grocery store.  Put all of it in a paper bag and seal it shut with duct tape.

Kill the douche and put him in a massive cake on-top of a gas controlled flipper. After he blows out the candles press the button, and out pops the bloodied body of guy he really shouldn't be hanging around with.

He is a douche after all.