Dear Playstation 3, I hate you.

For almost two years now you and I have been in a serious relationship with one another. Our relationship was like none other I had with my previous playstations. You met my every media need. When I wanted to watch blu-ray movies, you were there. When I wanted to play my games in HD, you were there. When I wanted to stream media from my hard-drive, you were there. And when I wanted to surf the internet on my big screen TV and play games online, you were there. Until you weren’t.

Last week I got out of bed with only one thought in my mind; to see whether or not the new Lara Croft game was out on the PSN. I switched you on, and tried to sign into the network. And that was when our trouble started. Selfishly you refused to sign me in, stating that there was a network error and demanding I check my settings. Appalled that you could suggest such a thing after working perfectly for me last night, I irritably did as you said. But it only got worse from there.

You forced me against my will to set up my network connection over and over again. And over and over again you told me that there was an error setting up my connection, that my WPA key was wrong. At first I thought that maybe this was all some elaborate joke; that I’d made a simple mistake and it would all be over soon. But no, it was no sort of rouse, or joke or prank. You were deliberately insulting my intelligence, telling me I had entered the wrong WPA key when I knew that I hadn’t.

Then, for one brief moment, you gave me a ray of hope to cling onto. You told me my settings had worked! For a split second I was filled with so much joy; my faithful Playstation had come back to me. I was so ecstatic that all thoughts of our immediate hardships left my mind. All that mattered was that you had allowed my settings to pass, and we were going to get back to normal again. In my happiness I tapped X to Test Connection and watched as you ran my settings through your standards.

And failed them.

All of them.

“Bastard fucking thing!” I screamed. How could you do this to me? How could you turn your back on the only one who was always supportive of you? When you’d failed me before I was the one who picked you up and fixed you. I was the one who restored everybody’s faith in you when it was lost. I was the one who sat by you for hours and hours on end to make sure you were working fine, and I was the only one who cleaned all your dust off you when everybody forgot you were there. And this is how you repay me? THIS IS WHAT YOU DO TO ME?

WELL FINE! BE THAT WAY THEN!

I NEVER LIKED YOU ANYWAY!

…

I’m sorry. I love you, I truly do. Please come back to me Playstation. I sincerely miss you. And I know that technically you’re working fine, but restricting me from getting online is not on. You can’t begin this relationship with freedom and then slowly start to take it away from me. I think I deserve to do everything you offered to me, or I don’t want to do anything at all. I only hope you can see that I am right, and you, dear Playstation, with your error codes that don’t mean anything and your belief that I can’t type my own key properly, are wrong.

Open your eyes Playstation. Open your eyes to your mistakes and I promise I’ll come back. Until then, I’ll be here, waiting for you.

Love, Jenn      

Dear Playstation 3, I hate you.

For almost two years now you and I have been in a serious relationship with one another. Our relationship was like none other I had with my previous playstations. You met my every media need. When I wanted to watch blu-ray movies, you were there. When I wanted to play my games in HD, you were there. When I wanted to stream media from my hard-drive, you were there. And when I wanted to surf the internet on my big screen TV and play games online, you were there. Until you weren’t.

Last week I got out of bed with only one thought in my mind; to see whether or not the new Lara Croft game was out on the PSN. I switched you on, and tried to sign into the network. And that was when our trouble started. Selfishly you refused to sign me in, stating that there was a network error and demanding I check my settings. Appalled that you could suggest such a thing after working perfectly for me last night, I irritably did as you said. But it only got worse from there.

You forced me against my will to set up my network connection over and over again. And over and over again you told me that there was an error setting up my connection, that my WPA key was wrong. At first I thought that maybe this was all some elaborate joke; that I’d made a simple mistake and it would all be over soon. But no, it was no sort of rouse, or joke or prank. You were deliberately insulting my intelligence, telling me I had entered the wrong WPA key when I knew that I hadn’t.

Then, for one brief moment, you gave me a ray of hope to cling onto. You told me my settings had worked! For a split second I was filled with so much joy; my faithful Playstation had come back to me. I was so ecstatic that all thoughts of our immediate hardships left my mind. All that mattered was that you had allowed my settings to pass, and we were going to get back to normal again. In my happiness I tapped X to Test Connection and watched as you ran my settings through your standards.

And failed them.

All of them.

“Bastard fucking thing!” I screamed. How could you do this to me? How could you turn your back on the only one who was always supportive of you? When you’d failed me before I was the one who picked you up and fixed you. I was the one who restored everybody’s faith in you when it was lost. I was the one who sat by you for hours and hours on end to make sure you were working fine, and I was the only one who cleaned all your dust off you when everybody forgot you were there. And this is how you repay me? THIS IS WHAT YOU DO TO ME?

WELL FINE! BE THAT WAY THEN!

I NEVER LIKED YOU ANYWAY!

…

I’m sorry. I love you, I truly do. Please come back to me Playstation. I sincerely miss you. And I know that technically you’re working fine, but restricting me from getting online is not on. You can’t begin this relationship with freedom and then slowly start to take it away from me. I think I deserve to do everything you offered to me, or I don’t want to do anything at all. I only hope you can see that I am right, and you, dear Playstation, with your error codes that don’t mean anything and your belief that I can’t type my own key properly, are wrong.

Open your eyes Playstation. Open your eyes to your mistakes and I promise I’ll come back. Until then, I’ll be here, waiting for you.

Love, Jenn      

This is Giantbomb not Playstation... 

you know, this is why I use a wired connection, I had the same problem, but then again, i`m a really slow person

I don't unders... ummm.
 
Sure

Ha ha! "Jenn"acide! Nice!
 
now what's this about playstation?

Did he have sex with his ps3?

haha Sometimes an abusive relationship can bring as much joy as it does hate

That's a serious relationship there! 
 
Mine is much more traditionalist and submissive. I say "Jump!" and she says "How far?". Just like i want it! ^^ 
 
Good text. I hope your relationship is able to surpass this setback and has a long and fruitful road ahead.

I don't understand.

Wired connection ftw.

That was a great read Jenn; hope your PS3 stops abusing the relationship with you though. =/

I wish I had a PS3, so I could hate it too.

These are the type of relationship threads that Giantbomb needs

PS3 network was down for maintenance last week wasn't it?
You probably just signed on then.

" These are the type of relationship threads that Giantbomb needs "

If I had a nickle for everytime I said that. (title)

Dear Jenn, 
 
It really hurts me that you would air our dirty laundry out for the entire world to see. Needless to say this is incredibly embarrassing and totally and completely unnecessary. There are so many things wrong with what you've written that I honestly don't even know where to begin addressing them. First of all, you play with me all night, pushing all the right buttons and having a good time, and you expect me to be working at my full mental capacity so early the next day? So maybe you did type in the correct WPA key, am I really to be blamed for just wanting to make sure that your precious connection was secure from internet banditos?  
 
Honestly, I'm quite flabbergasted that you would not only blow our little spat out of proportion, but show everyone? Really? So I couldn't get the internet connection settings test right after a few tries. Am I not a person that can make mistakes? Do I not feel? Do I not bleed....never mind, this argument wasn't very well thought out. 
 
Listen Jenn, all I'm saying is that I won't always be working at my absolute, top notch best. And you're going to have to look past that occasionally. But I urge you not to dwell on the bad, but instead, reminisce about all the good times we've had together. Getting your first platinum trophy, us laughing together at how unnecessary and useless Home is, you locking your door and casually searching "girls kissing" on Google image galleries as you explored your sexuality. What I'm trying to say is that we've had good times, let's continue having good times and not dwell on nonsense about who forgot the WPA key (you). 
 
Oh and by the way, Lara Croft is a self described "reformed slut". SHe uSed to be all over the place buT she's going steady with x-box right noW. You wouldn't have seen her on the playstation network even if you did get through. So that whole exErcise was poiNtless....anyway, not to place blame or whaTever. Once a promiscuous whore, alwaYs a promiscuous whore, Lara will come crawling back to us sOon eNough, I give it threE months.  
 
Yours Truly,  
Playstation 3

You're a fucking jerk. That Playstation could have a better life with a hobo, I mean, you didn't really do anything it couldn't do on itself, inside its box. All you did was use and abuse it.

I'm afraid he may have had sex with the console.

I hope your PS3 yellow lights on you for treating it like dirt.

This is the type of crazy I approve of. *thumbs up* 
 
Bravo Jennifer, Bravo.

Dear everyone,

Thankyou for the compliments.

Firstly, I'm a she, not a he. And even if I was a he, I'm sure my penis wouldn't fit in the ethernet port. So, come on guys. Be realistic. I'd never have sex with my ps3. I'm just not attracted to it in that way. :P

But to everybody who read, thanks ^^ And to whoever JennsPlaystation3 is... kinda stalkerish. I like it. I'm so impressed that you were able to make your own profile and set it up in such a way. I'm not even angry

Have a good one!!

you forgot its birthday?

Effort to read that.

These are the kinds of blogs I like to see.

Time heals all wounds as they say.. But if you're that impatient, get an Xbox with Halo 3 and RAAAAAAGGGGGE! 
 
EDIT: You also wouldn't of happened to of broken up Shank aswell have you?..

My PS3 gets the exact same trouble every few weeks. I use it such a little amount that I can't be bothered to arrange repairs or even find out what's wrong though.

SHS TWENTY ONE

It's too late to crack codes :P You know what it's NOT too late for? Having it simply explained to me :P

Sometimes if you reset your router and power cycle it (turning it off and unplugging it for ~5 minutes then starting it back up) it can help with connection problems. It looks like the damage to your relationship is already done, though.

" @benjaebe: Hahaha thanks. I did that and it didn't seem to work. Today, however, I re-set up my connection and instead of Testing Connection, I just exited and tried to sign in. And voila! Worked like a charm!! But then after all that there was nothing I wanted to do on PSN anyway :P "

" I wish I had a PS3, so I could hate it too. "

" These are the type of relationship threads that Giantbomb needs "

" *slow clap* "

It's your router that trying to keep you guys apart. The fact that it is jealous of the one thing that you spend most of your time with. In other words say hello to your router every once in awhile. Check how it's feeling. Maybe this will end the abusive relationship triangle between you, the PS3, and the router.

" This is Giantbomb not Playstation...  "

" @RE_Player92 said:

" This is Giantbomb not Playstation...  "

No, this is Patrick. "