T'Pol: The idiocy of Star Trek Enterprise

T'Pol, yeah... what a colossal tragedy she was. I mean, we all knew they were going to add a sexpot to the crew. They added a sexpot to Voyager, and apparently it worked, the ratings went up, even though it was completely shameless, and frankly, insulting. So they needed a really sexy piece of eyecandy that would get all us drooling morons, and we got T'Pol. But she wasn't just a sexpot, she was a sexpot who... was Vulcan? Why would you go and do that? What sense does it make to have the sex object be a Vulcan? Who could possibly think that those two things even go together?

I mean, we've got Spock, the famous first Vulcan. Does Spock scream eyecandy? No, Vulcans aren't about that at all. So why have it here? You've got this really attractive actress, Jolene Blalock, and she's brought in and she's going to be a sex object. Why then would you go and give her one of those awful short Vulcan haircuts? It's not quite as bad as Kes's stupid bighair pixie thing, but it doesn't look sexy. It's got that cut right across the eyebrows that reminds you of a bowl and they just... it's not hot. Vulcans generally don't have hot hairstyles (with the exception of Star Trek II's Saavik). So they were kinda working to defeat themselves with this.

And the outfit she wears... okay, it's not quite the catsuit that Seven had on, but it's disturbingly close. Why does this Vulcan wear something this... tight? It doesn't make sense, it looks like it's made to show off her figure. But Vulcans aren't about that, they fuck once every seven years. I guess she's not Starfleet, so she doesn't wear a Starfleet outfit, but cmon... give her something good and appropriate to wear. I can't believe Vulcans would actually wear this sort of tight form-fitting outfit when they go flying their Vulcan starships. I mean, they wore robes a lot on Vulcan. I think they might've even worn robes when they landed in ST First Contact. I don't think she should've worn robes as a uniform, that would've looked kinda odd on that bridge. But don't go with the Seven catsuit route, that makes no sense.

Then you've got the stupid Vulcan neuropressure sessions, cause they got tired of subjecting us to the awfulness that was the decontamination chamber, oh god what were they thinking. So instead, we get to see people laying around in 69 positions rubbing each other, all the while staring at each other's boobs and private parts. Jesus Christ, who thought this idiocy up? They're basically giving each other massages. It's just, it comes off looking really juvenile and silly and stupid and dumb.

And of course, we get to see T'Pol in her bedroom clothing in these neuropressure sessions. But again, it looks retarded, cause she has on these skimpy clothes that dive down and show off her ample cleavage, and which end up above her waist, showing her bare midriff. Again... why would a fucking Vulcan wear this sorta thing? Spock didn't wear these outrageous outfits, did he? No, I think he mostly wore robes in his quarters. He wore em in 2 and 6, all different sorts of robes. He was buried in a robe in 3. Seems like Vulcans like robes, I don't know why T'Pol would wear really revealing bedroom clothing. Of course, I suppose you could argue that Spock was male and T'Pol is female, but I don't really buy that that would make such a huge difference.

It's a big no no when you have to resort to adding a character solely to be a hot piece of ass and appeal to the lowest common denominator. But it's a double no no to then make that hot piece of ass a Vulcan.

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