There are some years where I feel like I have missed out, that I have spent too much time in the clutches of one game, only to realize as Christmas passes that I really, REALLY, should have picked up some other titles. At the start of this year, I wouldn’t have pictured myself in that situation. When my husband would turn to me and ask, “What’s next?” I would shrug my shoulders and go “I dunno, Fallout 4 is coming the week after my birthday, so that I guess.” And then I would turn back to grinding gear in Destiny or Diablo III and not give it another thought. Oh, how wrong I ended up being!

So to start, this blog is not as wide of scope as I would have liked. I haven’t played everything that came out, not by a long shot, and I haven’t even played everything that I wanted to play. The pile of shame is wide and deep and trying to muddle through it at the 11th hour is probably not good for me, for you dear reader, or for the games themselves. So I am going to do an end of the year awards blog and admit that I am probably leaving a lot of good stuff out. Still, I think there are things that I have played this year that deserve attention.

Also, this blog contains spoilers for games such as Fallout 4 and Halo 5. You have been warned, duders and dudettes!

Best Co-op of the Year - Until Dawn

In a year with a new Halo, Destiny: The Taken King, and any myriad of games that purport to have a crafted and lengthy “co-op” experience, my favorite of the year was a decidedly single player game. Until Dawn was a game that I played through from start to finish while my husband watched. He didn’t tell me how to play, or what to choose. The limit of his utterances was directed at helping me see collectibles in the environment. Still, the game was so good with an audience. We laughed at the funny stuff (thank goodness for the hammy Peter Stormare and one of the best characters of the year, Emily) and squealed at the gruesome deaths. We sat in tense silence as I tried to decide the fates of this motley group of kids. We would talk about what had just happened and try to figure out what would have happened if I had chosen differently. In the end, Until Dawn is an experience that can be played completely alone, but having a friend or significant other along for the ride makes it better.

Most Disappointing GOTY – Hotline Miami 2: Wrong Number

I was so stoked for Hotline Miami 2, I even took the step to preorder it on Steam. It’s really funny because it’s not normally a game type that I would love, but something about the original Hotline Miami grabbed me and wouldn’t let go. The music, the constant experimentation and quick reloads all worked together to create a game that soon became one of my all time favorites. So, when I heard that a new one was in the works, I was psyched. Then, I played it. The soundtrack was still crackling and the gameplay was, for all intents and purposes, the same. So what happened? Unlike the bite-size bloody puzzles of the first game where you could see a good portion of the map, with a little camera manipulation, the levels were too spacious. The hook of Hotline Miami was quick gameplay. Quick deaths. Quick reloads. The levels were small enough that failing was not an impediment to fun. You would just press “R” and be only a few moments away from where you had just been mauled by a dog or shot by a Russian Mobster. Hotline Miami 2 lost something by becoming bigger and trying to do more. It’s a shame and I often consider going back to it and trying again. Maybe it was me. All I know is that no game really made me quite as disappointed as this game did this year. The soundtrack is still great, however, so it has that going for it.

This category, unfortunately, had a few games vying for the number one slot. Everyone's Gone to the Rapture was a pretty good story and amazing music in a barely-there game. I love trying different types of experiences, but the sluggish pace and lack of meaningful interactivity really torpedoed my enjoyment of this game. It's somewhat telling that my favorite game ever developed by The Chinese Room is Amnesia: A Machine for Pigs, which has many of the same wonderful things that Rapture has, such as stunning music and a good story, but also has some actual gameplay elements to break up the monotony. But that's a discussion for another day or another blog. Also up for consideration was Halo 5. The worst thing that can be said is that it is just not Halo-y enough. I can't really put my finger on just why this game felt so bland, but it was just a real chore to get through, even playing through co-op. The shooting was nice, the art and graphics were okay, but it honestly felt like any another FPS, and that's just a shame. The game also makes you play as boring characters when all you really want to do is be the OG Master Chief (although Linda is pretty dope and has a neat helmet. Actually, scratch that. Linda wins HOTY (Helmet of the Year, new category I just made. Boom, you're welcome)). Also that revive mechanic was borderline terrible.

Best Story / Quest line – Fallout 4 “Blind Betrayal” aka “The touching but also kind of skeevy story of how I learned that my boyfriend was a synth made from the DNA of my kidnapped son”

Let’s get this out of the way first – The main storyline in Fallout 4 is underwhelming. The overall idea of being unfrozen after 200 years and going on a journey to find your kidnapped son is pretty interesting, but the execution leaves a bit to be desired. Add to that the fact that I called most of the twisty twists about halfway through the narrative and you have a story that doesn’t do much on its own to propel you forward. The real meat is in the side quests and the fun that you make on your own.

So, why is one of the quests from Fallout 4 on my list? Well, it’s a weird, weird one. SPOILER TIME! If you decide to side with the Brotherhood of Steel (two word reason why you should: Liberty Prime) you will eventually be tasked with tracking down one of your companions - the steadfast, stick in the mud, perfectly coiffed Paladin Danse. It seems that some information that you stole from The Institute during the main quest line has uncovered a shocking revelation about your friend – he's really a synth. Now the BoS wants you to merk him. WHAAAA?!?

Now, the story is touching and the way I played it was to, of course, save Danse because I wanted him to be my forever love in the Commonwealth. After you complete that quest, if you’ve reached the highest affinity level with him (easy to do just make some gun mods and the guy gets all hot and bothered) you can romance him, which opens up a whole big can of worms. Yes, Danse is a hunky military man with awesome hair and a cool suit of power armor and yes, hearing him yell “Tango Down” or “Affirmative” is pretty sexy. But, on the other hand, one of the big crazy twists that you learn as you play is that the synths are made using your son’s pristine, pre war DNA. So, as your son tells you, you’re all family. You, him, that Courser that you just killed, Curie in her cool new body, and Danse of course... How much of my son is in Danse is anyone’s guess. I subscribe to the theory that the DNA has had so much sciency stuff done to it that Danse isn’t really all that close to being family. I hope. I really, REALLY hope that that’s the case. Otherwise, that’s some fucked up psychosexual shit I unknowingly stumbled upon...

Either way, great story and probably the one of the weirder things I’ve played through this year.

Worst / Most Incomprehensible Story – Halo 5

Going back to Halo 5 for a moment, and I feel like I'm beating a dead grunt here, but the story in this game was just a hot mess. I finished this game just a few days ago and I can only scratch my head. I guess if I was actually engaged by the ideas that Halo 4 had brought to the table, I might have paid more attention and gotten more out of the narrative in this game, but I didn't. Be that as it may, here is my kind of quick and dirty synopsis of Halo 5 -

Our boy Master Chief is being called by Cortana, who is not dead but apparently in some galaxy-wide internet, and so he goes off with a team of Spartan buddies to find her. Locke and a team of his Spartan buddies, including Buck from seceret best Halo game, ODST, go off to find MC because they think MC is going to do something stupid, I guess. After a lot of barely explained shooting, we discover that Cortana is now evil because, reasons. And MC knew she was evil because, reasons. So he tries to stop her from using a bunch of Guardians (not Destiny ones, but Halo ones) to do, something. For, reasons. Oh and a bunch of AI are pissed at humans because they're disposible and think that's kind of shitty. Can't argue with that, it is pretty shitty. At the end, Cortana escapes but Locke saves MC and his Spartan Buddies by punching a thing until it breaks.

~FIN~

And that is the story of Halo 5 in a big, messy nutshell. It deserves an award. It's not an award to be proud of, but an award nonetheless.

Game I Lost the Most Time To - Destiny (Year 1 and The Taken King)

Destiny is the brain worm from the Wrath of Khan. You don't even realize what you're doing until you've spent hours leveling up a Sparrow Racing League book that you bought with real money or grinding out the Court of Oryx in the hope for new and better gear. You know that it's just the same stuff. You know that you have hundreds of games to play across Steam, XBox One and PS4. You know that you have games from 2015 that you need to play for GOTY considerations and fake awards. And yet there you sit at 7 am on a Saturday morning, wrapped in a blanket, talking to your boy Xur and debating the merits of trying to ecru enough strange coins to buy the Mida Multitool. You're a lady with a sickness. And it can only be cured by... more Crucible.

A close runner up this year would be Diablo III, which pleasantly chugs along with new content, new seasons, and new reasons to go back. While Destiny can often feel like a vampire sucking away your precious time to play games, Diablo III often felt refreshing when I returned to it. It helps that the game adds new things frequently and for no additional cost.

Game I Wish I Had Played this Year - SOMA

It's totally my jam. I loved Amnesia: The Dark Descent. I was super hyped for it. And then I played a bunch of Fallout 4 and Destiny and now it's New Year's Eve. Fuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuudge.

...And Finally, My GOTY - UNTIL DAWN

In a year with a new Fallout, giving my GOTY to Until Dawn seems insane. But here I sit, thinking about the year in total, and realizing that I had the most fun with Until Dawn. The characters were basic horror movie tropes, but they were acted with such conviction that I actually believed in them and their world. I wanted to save everyone, even the deliciously bitchy Emily. While the controls in the exploratory portions were sometimes finicky (I always had trouble aiming the flashlight even after hours of playing) I never had issues when the poop hit the fan and I needed to nail a QTE or make a quick decision in a conversation. Everything worked as I expected, and I never felt hindered when the action kicked in.

Interestingly enough, I had a very solid play through going until the very end. I made a quick judgment call and instead of saving all but one person, I ended my game with only three left alive. I failed them, and I felt it more acutely than I had ever expected to when I started the game. I figured if people died, they died. It was a part of the novelty. But as the game progressed to that final scene, I realized that I wanted desperately to save them all. I couldn't, though. Until Dawn, above all the other games I played this year, made me aware of what I was doing and what that would mean for the characters I was playing. Good job game, you made me care about a bunch of shitty kids. High five!

I would say that if you looked at Until Dawn and passed it over earlier this year, please return to it and give it some of your time. It's a fun, engaging story that doesn't overstay it's welcome. It's also gorgeous to look at, especially the snowy scenery, has some pretty cool twists and turns in the narrative, and you get to see Peter Stormare and Rami Malek chew a metric ton of scenery. If that doesn't make a GOTY, I don't know what does.