I used to rent video games through the post from this company called LoveFilm (they stylise it LOVEFiLM which really dicks around with the spellchecker, though so does LoveFilm as a single word to be fair). They decided to stop lending me video games so I decided to stop giving them money each month; a pretty fair compromise was reached. Today I received a series of questions attempting to ascertain exactly why I took this decision. As a conscientious member of society, I of course chose to oblige and answered all of their questions to the best of my ability.

By question two their curiosity had ramped up considerably and they approached the topic of my absconsion head on. I do feel in retrospect that they peaked a bit early with this one. The flow of the survey would have benefited if this had come closer to the end.

This is a ridiculous question.

This one, however, really got my creative juices flowing.

I had to choke back tears of guilt by the last question.

It struck me how insignificant LoveFilm had been in the bigger picture of my life; that I might have meant the world to them, but for me they were simply one of a pool of video streaming services that I used and discarded at will. Looking at all the ticked boxes made me feel dirty and monstrous, like I’d kept them all in my cellar for twenty years, abusing them daily for my singular pleasure and to maintain the facade that I am, in fact, still in control of myself.

So goodbye LoveFilm; you were once my prized possession, now you mean less than nothing to me. That unlocked door you dragged yourself through to reach ‘freedom’? That wasn’t left open by accident, I kept you for years why would I suddenly become careless? Enjoy your hard won ‘freedom’ LoveFilm, I’m sure you’ll be fine without me.