Be a Ryan Davis to others in your life.

Those words sum up everything about today for me.

I first really knew the name Jeff Gerstmann (stay with me for a moment here) following the Gamespot debacle. When I heard they were building a new website, especially how interested people were about it, I paid attention. I have followed Giant Bomb for it's entire run, and specifically the Arrow Pointing Down/BombCast.

At the same time, I started to really examine some personal issues with depression and anxiety I had been dealing with my entire life. My doctor prescribed me medication and I attended therapy. One of my biggest frustrations was dealing with the inability to deal with the less happy events in life, and the anger I would feel when I disagreed with others. This boiled into a tremendous amount of cynicism and negativity. Even at the time, I understood how bad cynicism and negativity were, so I avoided Forums for the most part just because of that. It always feels so toxic.

I've spent the last few years making a real push to be more positive and just be a better human being. To shed that cynicism. There are a couple of people I credit for being models of that. Ryan Davis is one of those people.

I have never met any of the Giant Bomb dudes, but the podcast/previews/etc always feel like I HAVE met them. The camaraderie of those features is infectious. It feels comfortable. I'd often try to watch one while playing a game, with a beer at my side, but would often realize I had been watching or listening for over an hour, with the game on pause. A lot of that had to do with Ryan's ability to bring you in and the love he showed everyone.

I initially posted a response to a thread about today's terrible news on Reddit, basically detailing what I've said here, but in much briefer terms. Reddit user PrayForMojo_ responded with the following.

Stay strong buddy. Don't let sad become depressed or cynical again. Be a Ryan Davis to others in your life.

PrayForMojo_ via /r/games

That made me cry. Of course, I'm an easy crier. Weddings and funerals fuck me up. But those words hit me. It perfectly encapsulated the take away from today.

Rest in peace, bruddah.