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whyareyoucrouchingspock

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Hideo Kojima is the developer I hate the most

Japan is known for a lot in the Western world, especially on the internet, rape, being nuked, and cartoon drawings of girls of a questionable looking age. All these things resonate with the Western culture, indeed it is even difficult to go to a forum where teenage boys exist that don't have badly drawn anime girls, dressed like some sort of space prostitute. One such Japanese inspired creation also predominant with young adults, is Metal Gear Solid.

To many, Metal Gear Solid represents the pinnacle of gaming, unrivaled story, that is expertly crafting by Hideo Kojima, the creative mastermind behind the series. Indeed these young adults tend to be quite passionate about it, obnoxiously so.

Hero
Hero

I have taken it upon myself to create this blog, demonstrating a small part of the depth, the complexity of writing and thought put into Metal Gear Solid, my ultimate hope through this, is that we all gain a better insight not only into Metal Gear Solid but the thought provoking Hideo Kojima himself. Given this is a huge undertaking and due to his genius, which is very, very large in nature.I will put it in comprehensible terms, for those who may not have necessarily played through the masterpieces like me by simply taking a segment, as opposed to attempting to examine it on a whole.

We will start off with Metal Gear Solid 3.

No Caption Provided

The selected clip is taken as the example.

The opening explained We have ran into a few snags, these guys were after Sokolov too apparently they were taking orders from a grue colonel named Vulgin.

We have established people are after him, in particular someone named Volgin.

Boss walks out with two boxes, drops one and nearly knocks Sokolov off the bridge, she does this twice. We have established she is bad. She explains Sokolov comes with me.

We have established she wants Sokolov with ill intent.

She is surrounded by bee's. which proceed irritate snake and take Sokolov, she looks up at the helicopter explaining my friends, let us fight together again.

he has ill intent, not only wants Sokolov, but has now taken him by force with an unknown party she called friends who she will fight alongside.

She addresses colonel Volgin i.e. the bad fellow after him calmly retorting... Welcome to my country, and to my unit!

We have now established, ill intent, wanting and taking Sokolov by force with unknown comrades we now know is colonel Volgins unit (to which the boss and the Cobra unit are now apart of, obviously).

Boss, what is this? Snake retorts, while dribbling.

I'm defecting to the Soviet union you absolute fucking retard she replies explaining she is GIVING Volgin nuclear warheads.

After picking up the warheads Volgin asks Are we talking him with us? to Which she replies No.

Super secret well written non-retard logical man snake retorts What are you talking about?

She attacks him, breaks his gun then proceeded to break his arm.

Afterwords.... Volgin explains he's seen my face, we can't let him live... he must die to which The Boss explains she will take care of him.

She puts out her hand in friendship hoping Snake will be badly written enough to take it... Ignoring the fact she has defected, taken Sokolov forcefully without permission, joined Volgin, gave him nukes, broke his arm, and implied she will kill him for Volgan.

Thankfully, Snake realizes this is dumb and runs away, as he doesn't want thrown off a bridge, the game gets canceled due to obvious mediocrity, and Hideo Kojima shoots himself in the mouth.

No Caption Provided

Another example, Metal Gear Solid.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Bd-p7oKMj8w

Revolver Ocelot (Revolver Ocelot)
Revolver Ocelot (Revolver Ocelot)

1. We are introduced to Special Operations Fox Hound (REVOLVER) Ocelot. (REVOLVER) himself refers to himself as (REVOLVER).

2. (REVOLVER) has a gun, it's a (REVOLVER).

3. (REVOLVER) explains while skillfully flicking his (REVOLVER) around, that his (REVOLVER), is the greatest handgun ever made, Six Bullets, more than enough to Kill Anything that moves.

4. After (REVOLVER) introducing himself as (REVOLVER) Ocelot, waving around his (REVOLVER) and explaining why his (REVOLVER) is the greatest handgun ever made, (REVOLVER) explains... that he will show you why they call (REVOLVER), (REVOLVER).

Shakespearean
Shakespearean

A lot of games have terrible writing and story. Anybody who plays video games can tell you this fact. What annoys me personally (IMO) is just how smug the games are. How smug the fans are. How smug the gaming media are about without actually being objective (like me). As a young fellow I recall playing titles like Homeworld and Planescape Torment. Superior titles with superior writing and story-telling. Homeworld, sadly, has been all but forgotten. I have to sit on many gaming forums listening to 15 year olds and reading nonsense with IGN and gamespot claiming these games are masterpieces of the medium. When many aspects (particularly this Metal Gear Solid 4) are terrible. Encurage these younger gamers to ignore this nonsense and purchase Planescape Torment from GOG.com or hunt amazon for Homeworld I feel gaming would improve. Even if only for a little bit, it will be worth it.

True Masterpiece
True Masterpiece
189 Comments

191 Comments

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ma_rc_01

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Edited By ma_rc_01

@whyareyoucrouchingspock said:

How smug the gaming media are about without actually being objective (like me).

HA!

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sockemjetpack

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Edited By sockemjetpack

Yeah the Metal Gear games are fucking silly. However that's why I played and enjoyed them. So yeah my hair is a bird...

EDIT: Also Kuwabara Kuwabara.

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AngelN7

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Edited By AngelN7

So wait let me get this straight for every 'console franchise' you hate there's an equaly better PC one ? or you know like Mass Effect is comparable to Heavy Rain who according to you is "worst" than Total War a game that features 0 Krogans? ... get out of here!

Stop playing console games dude please ascend to another plane they need you up there maaan.

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AuthenticM

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Edited By AuthenticM

I think OP needs to calm down and stop taking Metal Gear so seriously.

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oraknabo

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Edited By oraknabo

Writing is the least important thing about the Metal Gear games.

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Animasta

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Edited By Animasta

@EuanDewar said:

Actually now it's like 8 pages in the responses are way dumber than the OP nice going great job.

at least they weren't being completely fucking racist

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JasonR86

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Edited By JasonR86

Ugh.

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TheHumanDove

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Edited By TheHumanDove

@EuanDewar said:

Actually now it's like 8 pages in the responses are way dumber than the OP nice going great job.

English. Do you speak it?

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Strife777

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Edited By Strife777

Your casual racism towards Japan made me kind of want to stop reading your post, but I read it anyway. Didn't leave satisfied with your arguments.

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PeasantAbuse

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LeetBalla

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Edited By LeetBalla

Your writing skills are fucking awful. Learn to write and articulate a coherent point then, get back to me.

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robot4me

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Edited By robot4me

Kojima does suck as a game creator but why the hatred for japanese culture.

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solidejake

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Edited By solidejake

I imagine that Hideo Kojima could write a better blog post ranting about something than you can. Want to criticize his writing, make sure that yours doesn't contain a massive amount of errors first.

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JasonR86

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Edited By JasonR86

@robot4me said:

Kojima does suck as a game creator but why the hatred for japanese culture.

Because he wants attention.

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QuistisTrepe

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Edited By QuistisTrepe

Kojima is fucking clownshoes and the most overrated name in the business by far. But somehow Spock, you manage to express your opinion in the clumsiest manner possible.

Anyways, among my favorite Kojima moments was his ironic criticism of the plot of Crysis. For someone who is allegedly so deep and insightful, his utter lack of self-awareness is just extraordinary.

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Vextroid

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Phil Fish is that you?

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Slag

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Edited By Slag

Why don't you blog about games you do like e.g. Homeworld and Planescape: Torment instead of ripping on whatever you don't like?

I think you'd get a better reception and frankly it would be more interesting topic matter.

And since you claim that people have forgotten those games, perhaps you could help change that.

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Clinkz

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Edited By Clinkz

@ArbitraryWater said:

@Clinkz said:

This just in:

Planescape Torment isn't fun to play.

Let's be fair. So is Metal Gear Solid.

To an extent, I will agree. But compared to MGS, Planescape is nonexistent in terms of game play.

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ArbitraryWater

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Edited By ArbitraryWater

@Clinkz said:

@ArbitraryWater said:

@Clinkz said:

This just in:

Planescape Torment isn't fun to play.

Let's be fair. So is Metal Gear Solid.

To an extent, I will agree. But compared to MGS, Planescape is nonexistent in terms of game play.

Still probably one of the best written games ever made, despite the gameplay either consisting of walking around Sigil or engaging in a bad version of the Baldur's Gate combat. While I do love me some MGS, mostly for the batshit insanity. Planescape Torment is probably in my top 5 RPGs.

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PixelPrinny

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Edited By PixelPrinny

@Slag said:

Why don't you blog about games you do like e.g. Homeworld and Planescape: Torment instead of ripping on whatever you don't like?

I think you'd get a better reception and frankly it would be more interesting topic matter.

And since you claim that people have forgotten those games, perhaps you could help change that.

If only everyone took this advice to heart, the internet would be a much, much better place.

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Clonedzero

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Edited By Clonedzero

yeah, i'd have to agree metal gear solid series is the most overrated crap in existence.

the series is SO super self serious. like to a insane degree. yet you fight a boss who attacks you with BEES. another boss which is a fat guy on ROLLER BLADES. a vampire, and a bunch of underage school girls with guns? wtf?

not to mention the plot and stories of the series are the most convoluted crap ever. its not complex because its a complex and interesting story with lots of aspects to it. its complex for the sake of being overly complex. theres no depth to it. and the bad guy is possessed by his arm that he had attached from an earlier villain for no real reason?

its one of those things thats really awesome when you're playing/watching it, but when you stop afterwards to critically think about the story and characters, it sorta falls apart.

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Clonedzero

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Edited By Clonedzero

@LeetBalla said:

Your writing skills are fucking awful. Learn to write and articulate a coherent point then, get back to me.

guessing you're talking about the first post. in which case there's two ways i can understand this comment being made. either you have HORRIBLE reading comprehension skills as his writing was perfectly fine. or that you're trying to dismiss his opinion while insulting him on something that was fine. sure its not perfect, but i understood all his points. so either you're HORRIBLE at understanding peoples writing or you're a dick.

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Jay444111

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Edited By Jay444111

@Clonedzero said:

@LeetBalla said:

Your writing skills are fucking awful. Learn to write and articulate a coherent point then, get back to me.

guessing you're talking about the first post. in which case there's two ways i can understand this comment being made. either you have HORRIBLE reading comprehension skills as his writing was perfectly fine. or that you're trying to dismiss his opinion while insulting him on something that was fine. sure its not perfect, but i understood all his points. so either you're HORRIBLE at understanding peoples writing or you're a dick.

Are you actually DEFENDING the guy who made such racist and just terrible posts constantly!?

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Clonedzero

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Edited By Clonedzero

@Jay444111: im not aware of his history of posting. i dont keep track of that lol

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TheHumanDove

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I fight for the army of Jay

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MariachiMacabre

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Edited By MariachiMacabre

@Clonedzero said:

@Jay444111: im not aware of his history of posting. i dont keep track of that lol

Here is the title, unaltered, of his post from earlier today. Try and decipher it's vast mysteries.

Powerful consoles matter not Cliffy B short fool

It's like a 20-sided Rubik's Cube die...thing.

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zero_

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Edited By zero_

I love Kojima. Any man that is willing to jump ship with a series that could've been a Hollywood AAA blockbuster series into one with his quirks has to be insane. I mean, MGS2.. come on. Also, MGS3's ending is the best thing ever.

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deactivated-5f9398c1300c7

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hankyPanky from gametrailers? Is that you?

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TechnoSyndrome

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Edited By TechnoSyndrome

I think Kojima is mostly a terrible writer, but you're even worse.

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landon

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@Clonedzero: There are no underage schoolgirls with guns in Metal Gear.

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Commisar123

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@whyareyoucrouchingspock: I find your first sentence to be incredibly distasteful. In the future when taking a controversial point of view try not to alienate your reader in the first 5 words.

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landon

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Edited By landon

@Tru3_Blu3 said:

hankyPanky from gametrailers? Is that you?

Looked up that user name, and found this.

Fucking copy and paste blog from 2 years ago. Either it's the same person, or he's guilty of plagiarism.

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deactivated-63f899c29358e

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@Landon said:

@Tru3_Blu3 said:

hankyPanky from gametrailers? Is that you?

Looked up that user name, and found this.

Fucking copy and paste blog from 2 years ago. Either it's the same person, or he's guilty of plagiarism.

Ha, I remember HankyPanky... God dammit. I hope it is plagiarism, either way I feel like it would be the best if this thread was closed. (and maybe give Mr. Spock there a warning)

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redcream

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Edited By redcream

I agree that Planescape Torment is a masterpiece and so does most review sites I know. But man comparing the writing on a CRPG and a stealth game? Furthermore not everyone has a talent to write something like that. Not everyone can create masterpieces.

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deactivated-5f9398c1300c7

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@Landon said:

@Tru3_Blu3 said:

hankyPanky from gametrailers? Is that you?

Looked up that user name, and found this.

Fucking copy and paste blog from 2 years ago. Either it's the same person, or he's guilty of plagiarism.

Wow, someone actually looked him up for a case like this? You're officially a good human being in my book.

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xaLieNxGrEyx

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Edited By xaLieNxGrEyx

I find it funny that because the writting isn't top tier, some people assume the rest of it must be utmost trash.

MGS thrives on the fiction and imagination of Hideo. Just because some scenarios are poorly written means little.

Congratualtions you've pointed out character flaws in attempts to progress a story.

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McShank

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Edited By McShank

@whyareyoucrouchingspock said:

@Cincaid said:

@laserbolts said:

I do think Hideo Kojima is overrated as all hell

Yep. Wouldn't occur to me to write a blog about it though.

You should. It's better to explain why than just make a blank statement. I hate when people do that. They do it all the time on gamespot user reviews. Very annoying.

just like your blogs are, Very annoying. Make a blog that has some significance other then your own personal hatred towards someone who has made something thousands enjoy. Sure he is overrated as all hell but who care. I hate twilight but I dont blog about it, i just state I dont hink vampires should sparkle sparkle and leave it at that.

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MariachiMacabre

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Edited By MariachiMacabre

@Village_Guy said:

@Landon said:

@Tru3_Blu3 said:

hankyPanky from gametrailers? Is that you?

Looked up that user name, and found this.

Fucking copy and paste blog from 2 years ago. Either it's the same person, or he's guilty of plagiarism.

Ha, I remember HankyPanky... God dammit. I hope it is plagiarism, either way I feel like it would be the best if this thread was closed. (and maybe give Mr. Spock there a warning)

Yeah I already flagged this bullshit thread but it's miraculously still up. Finding out this whole blog is fucking plagiarized is even better though. I was wondering why this blog has relatively good spelling and grammar when those things are never present in threads.

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LiquidPrince

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Edited By LiquidPrince

The opening paragraph makes you seem like a bit of a judgmental dick. Just saying.

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MariachiMacabre

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Edited By MariachiMacabre

@LiquidPrince said:

The opening paragraph makes you seem like a bit of a judgmental dick. Just saying.

And more than a bit of a piece of shit racist asshole.

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trace

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Edited By trace

Wellp, now that we have evidence of cross-posting troll blogs, I see no reason for this to remain open.