Has anybody ever tried cooking with their semen?
About a month ago I got a bit adventurous and decided to fap in the frying pan, using my semen in place of the extra butter I usually put in the pan when I'm grilling grill'd cheese.
I didn't notice much difference in flavor when I tried it, though it definitely didn't taste any worse.
Last night, however, while in the process leading up to grilling two sandwiches for lunch for myself and my sick mother, I noticed my neighbor's 13 year old daughter changing in the yard next door presumably after getting out of the pool. I got the urge to fap again and decided to incorporate it into my cooking again in secret.
My mother did seem to notice a difference in flavor in the better - I nonchalantly told her I used a different butter, which in it's essence wasn't entirely a lie, I just didn't specify it was my nut butter. I'm not about to lie to my mother.
I consider myself a man of principles, you know.
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