Now featuring inappropriately proportioned soldiers
I saw Battle: Los Angeles. I had been frequently seeing trailers for months for that movie, and I am glad it has now been released. Why? SO I'LL NEVER HAVE TO SEE THAT EVIL, WICKED TRAILER AGAIN. Seriously, in the first months of 2011 I had seen the Battle: Los Angeles trailer on almost all the several films I had seen at the time (such as Green Hornet). I saw the film in the cinema, and I left feeling lazy as though nothing happened. I also thought the film was a messy disaster, even from the start. As if you thought the film wasn't bad enough, words cannot even describe how worse the video game is. It costs $10, which, while still low, is rather ludicrous for a game this short.
The campaign is very brief, at just 45 minutes long (less than 20 minutes if you rush through it). No kidding, this makes it extremely short, which is very unacceptable, considering that this game was rushed. There are also no other modes aside from said campaign; there's no multiplayer mode, no challenge mode, and no horde mode. The game is incredibly easy, as your character can take a large amount of punishment and quickly heal up if you don't take any damage thereafter. You'll also never have to worry about conserving ammo due to ammo crates being plentiful.
With repetitive level design, disappointing enemy design, generic soundtrack, a paper-thin story told via comic-book cutscenes instead of footage from the movie, and only one enemy type throughout the entire game, this game ultimately killed Saber Interactive as it was their one and only game.
All you do in combat is simply peek around cover and wait for opportunities to stand up and shoot. Your squadmates aren't much help as they repeat the same two or three orders constantly every time enemies appear.
Enemies never change battle tactics. Also, while the enemy AI is competent, they're too tall to be fully protected by cover, allowing you to easily headshot them. The dumb aliens take almost an entire magazine to kill.
There are only four weapons in the entire game, consisting of an assault rifle, frag grenades, a sniper rifle, and a rocket launcher. This is made worse when the guns are very wimpy-sounding and have no recoil when firing, which makes them feel more like cap guns than actual firearms.
The movie is terrible, the game is terrible, the whole entire mess known as Battle: Los Angeles is terrible. Also, noisy, violent, fugly, and incredibly stupid.