Do you say "I love you" to your dad?

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redcream

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Poll Do you say "I love you" to your dad? (472 votes)

Yes, through words 13%
Yes, through actions 18%
Yes, in both actions and words 35%
No 35%

Hey duders! Is it just me or is saying "I love you" to one's father embarrassing and awkward? Don't get me wrong, I really love my father but I don't really say it to him directly. I just assume that he knows what I feel being he also had a father. I can't even recall the last time I said those words to him.

So guys and girls, how do you express love to your dad?

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xanadu

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It's not embarrassing at all. My dad was and is my hero and I will always tell him I love him. If your father was gone tomorrow would you really be ok with never telling him a simple thing like "I love you, dad"?

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Turambar

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No, not really. It's very much an Asian culture thing, where father son bonds don't get expressed in that fashion.

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Zefpunk

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Tell him you love him, better than regretting it if something happens. I am almost 30 and tell my dad I love him all the time.

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Zeik

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I don't really say it to anyone honestly. It's always felt like an incredibly intimate thing to say to someone and I've never felt comfortable saying it casually. I'm fully aware that's pretty silly, but it's not something I can change easily at this point.

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RonGalaxy

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I am a computer simulation, therefore I am not capable of feeling this thing you humans call "love".

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DJMoo

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#6  Edited By DJMoo

Yea all the time. I not only say I love you to both my parents but I often give them a kiss too. Maybe it's a culture thing, but hispanic families tend to be affectionate and close. Obviously not in an incest type of way.

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TheHT

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#7  Edited By TheHT

There's nothing awkward or embarrassing about it. If you love someone, tell them often.

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Cramsy

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Seems fine. If you love him it's nice to say it once in a while

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redyoshi

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Not once. More importantly, I've never said it to my mother either. There's been a few times I've thought about it but the words die in my throat.

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Superkenon

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I give my dad a hearty "love ya" and a hug every time I see him. Granted that's not a super formal way of saying it, but we're pretty casual.

Generally I think actions speak a lot louder than words -- your relationship with the guy's not going to be made or broken by whether you choose to say three words or not. That's like the furthest thing from the core. All the same, people like words. It's good to hear someone say they love you, even if you already understand that that's the case. One time when we were talking, the conversation somehow strayed into a sappy kinda territory where I started mentioning what I appreciated about him and the things he taught me, and I'll never forget how happy he looked. It was somewhat surprising at the time, because we get along really well and it seems like that stuff goes without saying, but it really meant something to him to hear it straight. Nothing wrong with a little affirmation, as it turns out.

But then, everyone's different. I know people who just get super uncomfortable when you get even the least bit feelingsy, so hey.

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lead_dispencer

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My dad is a very old school pat on the back and hand shake type of guy.He is not very good at expressing emotions through words and uses comedy/cracks jokes as his basic reaction to most any situation. I love my dad and he is my hero but these are things I see in him as I have matured. I have some of the same faults too but I appreciate who he is and what he has done for me because no matter what he has supported me every single day. Ever since I moved out of the house, going on 4 years now, our relationship has changed to a more adult oriented father and son relationship. He tells me he loves me and I tell him. We worked our way there.

@xanadu: Thats how I live my life, if someone were to die tomorrow I often think about the last thing I said or thought about that person. It really makes life easier because I do not have petty arguments with friends or family and it makes it easier to forgive them if I am upset.

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gamefreak9

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No... stoicism is not dead. I give him a big hug when I see him. Saying things in words discounts them, see Wittgenstein. This neediness to express things in words is very much trendy nowadays.

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DrFat32

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Saying that you love your Dad or your Mum for that matter can be awkward but do it a because at some point they wont be there any more and you will not get the chance. I didn't say I loved you Dad and now he has been gone for 12 years and I regret it and have no way to get that back. Just do it.

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rethla

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#14  Edited By rethla

No i dont and even if i did saying that word has no meaning.

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Humanity

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No but thats because I had that oldschool dad that worked hard and made sure the family was provided for but he wasn't the "play ball with your kid" type of guy. I greatly respect my dad but that would be the most out of place and awkward thing in the world for me to seriously say to him.

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CaLe

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Not that I remember, but I do tell my dog.

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alistercat

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I never used to. I don't express my feelings for people well but I have been making an effort to say it to him each time I see him because he's been ill all his life and will die earlier than most. Most likely without me there.

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Burt

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Yeah I do, Don't really like showing my emotions like that but my dad's father died when he was in his twentys and he's always told me he regrets not telling him more often.

Life's too short to worry about things like that, there's nothing more important than your family.

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456nto

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You should make a point to do it at least a few times before you no longer have the opportunity. You might regret it.

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Naoiko

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My parents were both never huge on the huggy emotional words growing, but as I've grown and age I realized sometimes they were just to embarrassed to say it. I now make it a point that every time we talk I tell my Dad (or Mom) that I love them both very much, and that I appreciate all that they do for me. My parents now both tell me that they love me and give me a big hug every time I see them. =) It's pretty nice. I learned that even if someone knows how you feel, it's best to tell them often.

So yeah I guess I do both. I try and help my Dad and Mom out when I can, and I tell them.

Also, if your reading this post, your awesome. Thank you for all the support and laughs duders. Never let anyone put you down with their mean lies, and keep trying your best.

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bigsocrates

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As someone whose dad died when he was fairly young I wish I'd said it more.

Unless your dad was really abusive or cruel (or absent) it's unlikely you're ever going to regret telling him you love him, while you might definitely regret the opposite when he's no longer around to hear it.

In my experience it's never a bad idea to tell the people you love how you feel about them. Not constantly to the point of being maudlin, but at least once in awhile.

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JordoST

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Yeah, say it everytime I finish on the phone to my mother or my father, or when I leave to go somewhere.

He's had 2 strokes and a heart attack :c

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456nto

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Unless your dad was really abusive or cruel (or absent) it's unlikely you're ever going to regret telling him you love him

I don't think this is always the case. You will be in a much healthier state of mind if you forgive people and move on, as opposed to refusing to reconcile your past. I doubt anybody who says "my dad sucks, I'll hate him forever" is truly happy about it.

Besides, forgiving somebody and liking them despite them being seriously abusive to you will make them think twice. There is nothing more unnerving. It's a win-win situation.

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Jesus_Phish

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I only say it to my girlfriend. I'm not sure if I've ever said it to either of my parents. My family aren't ones for showing much emotion towards each other.

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MooseyMcMan

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It kinda sucks that society has done this to us. Made it that we feel awkward to tell our fathers that we love them because saying things like that isn't "manly." Ugh, I hate society.

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planetfunksquad

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Yeah, I say it but not as often as I'd say it to my Mum. Last time I said it to him was when his brother died. I should say it more.

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HH

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#27  Edited By HH

nah.

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egg

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I used to do it all the time until he paid me to stop.

Now every Wednesday I get a check.

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theacidskull

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#29  Edited By theacidskull

He knows I love him. I know he loves me. There's not much more to it. We are the type of guys who express emotions through our actions rather than words.

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trulyalive

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My family simply doesn't do that, so, no, I don't.

It's not even a societal thing with us, it's just that on my mum's side of the family, everyone is super tight-knit and whenever any of us meet, it's hardcore fucking party drinking murder on our brain cells, so we don't say I love you there because we're all too drunk (unless we get *really* fucked up in which case, slurred "I Love You, Man" between me and my alcoholic uncle is all anyone will hear)

My Dad's side of the family is weirdly distant...we only ever see my Grandad with regularity and everybody else is maybe once or twice every two years. I think I'm the only one in my family to catch up with any of those relatives by Facebook, let alone in person. So yeah, we don't get too deep into emotive territory there.

But I know my Dad knows I love him. The things I say to him and the way I am with him, him being the first person I go to when I don't know what to do with my life and the last person I want to let down...I don't hide any of that, I just don't say those particular words.

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Brendan

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I put no because the once or twice a year I say it at most probably doesn't count.

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TheManWithNoPlan

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Any chance I get.

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chaser324

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#33 chaser324  Moderator

I've only started saying it on a more regular basis in recent years. I guess I'm getting more sentimental as I get older or something.

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Jonny_Anonymous

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My dad is an asshole so no I don't.

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Tom_omb

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No. My father died when I was 7 months old and my mom remarried when I was 14, but I never thought of my step father as a father. Even then, this was never a thing my mom and I did.

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Colony024

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@chaser324 said:

I've only started saying it on a more regular basis in recent years. I guess I'm getting more sentimental as I get older or something.

Ditto.

Not that things were in any way bad before, but my relationship with my parents changed a lot, for the better, ever since I moved out on my own (roughly 15 years ago by now). Less parental, more friendshippy, I guess. These days my dad and I go to concerts and festivals and such too, while as a teen I'd have been embarrassed about that. Going to see some stuffy 80 year old jazz musician with your old man was not something to brag about if you wanted to look cool in highschool haha. Nowadays though, I cherish it.

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nightriff

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After every communication we have I will pretty much say it.

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hermes

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Yes, I do. Now more than ever. As others said, I guess old age makes me more sentimental...

Initially it was rather awkward, and something that I felt was assumed and obvious. But it is nice to hear, regardless...

Besides, you never know how many chances life will give you...

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jadegl

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Nope, never awkward. Then again, I am a lady so maybe that makes it different. I have no problems telling people I love them, if I love them, and I love my family. They are the reason I am who I am, so I tell them all the time how important they are to me as often as I can. You never know when they may be gone, and my parents are both in their 60s, so I definitely feel the pressure of time. Not only that, but my dad has had a triple bypass (when I was in high school so probably 15 years ago at this point) and my mother had a stroke about 13 years ago, so there are added issues that make me express myself effusively and often.

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monkeyking1969

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I tell him sometimes. The older he gets (he's 75) the more he needs to hear it, and the more he likes it in some ways. Yet, at a certain point it must make you feel very old because you know that sometimes when your child gets around to telling you they they 'love you', they are imagining a time when they won't be able to say it.

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deactivated-5bb67033e3422

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Via ouija board but while he was alive I'd say it. It wasn't an issue.

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joshwent

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"No" is winning?!? Fuck.

Somebody crack open a window in this thread, we gotta air all this Machismo out.

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Harkat

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#43  Edited By Harkat

I think saying "I love you" in words to your family is a really english-speaking world thing

it's weird to me

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BaneFireLord

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Yep. My dad's great.

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Fredchuckdave

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#45  Edited By Fredchuckdave

Yep, my Dad's a nice guy but even if he was dictatorial or something I imagine it would still be a thing.

Edit: The fuck does through actions mean? Sounds like bullshit to me.

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Getz

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No, but I do kiss him square on the lips

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Nasar7

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Despite our differences, I make sure to tell my Dad I love him. I don't see him as often as I'd like because he lives in a different country. Basically I think unless your parents abused you somehow, you should tell them you love them.

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Spoonman671

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Git outta 'ere wit dis lovey dovey nonsense!

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bacongames

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I have a weird relationship with my parents not only as the second generation immigrant of the house but one so much younger than my parents. There's kind of a self-expression barrier that makes it difficult to have that come up (even though I owe my parents so much for their love and support) regardless of who it is in the house.

So in a lot of ways I technically do but not nearly as often as I'd like because I wish my parents were altogether closer to who I am.

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theanticitizen

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Sure do! My dad's always been there for me during the good and bad so we've gotten to be really close. At times he's more like a friend. Plus my moms side of the family is Hispanic and it's common to be openly affectionate with family.