@Hizang said:
So a few weeks ago I let the internet know that I believe myself to be depressed, I say believed because I've not had it confirmed by a doctor. So I was going to go a few weeks ago, but when I went to make it I chickened out, I just told myself things will sort themselves out. But then a few days later I would feel down again and say to myself I am going to make one, but yet again the next day I would convince myself not to go. Well I haven't felt really down for a few days, but i told myself its my half day at work today so I'm going to go to the doctors.
I hate the waiting room at the doctors, all the chairs and slanted slightly so your always falling forward on them. No phones allowed either so its just me sitting there thinking whats he going to tell me. When I got in he asked me a few simple questions, he didn't give much feedback just asked questions. At the end he gave me a questionnaire to fill in, then to come back in a few weeks. It was nice talking to a professional about this, but I wish he would have gave more feedback.
I've been going downhill though, not too much but I've been told by others I don't seem as cheerful as I was yesterday or just not seemed myself. My parents have noticed too, I recommended to my dad one day that we go to Paris on holiday. So my dad books it and me and him are going to stay in a hotel in Paris for 2 days, I hate to feel like this but Im not excited. It's not that I just don't want to go, I just am not excited about it.
Just a small update to those that wanted me to keep them informed. Oh and the Wii U launches in the UK tomorrow, I think I may get one. But fuck Tesco have zero advertisements up or anything, strange.
I found this interesting to read as it brought back memories of my first trip to the doctor for help with depression. Took me until 2010 to actually work up to it, just into the new year. That first step is always one of the hardest things, so many fears to overcome, hence why it took me something like 12 years after first suspecting I might have more than just a temporary low mood which was just down to teenage shit. So well done on getting over the threshold. The waiting room is an odd experience, I heartily recommend taking a book or magazine with you just to keep your mind on something other than building up the tension over the impending appointment.
The problem for GPs is just that they don't have oodles of time for you, I think it's somewhere between 10 & 15 minutes for each appointment & they obviously can't diagnose you in such a short period of time. What I'll say is that I did that questionnaire (this one, right?) is that I did it while I was there at the surgery. When you do it I don't think matters hugely, because as far as I remember it is referring to events from over the past 2 weeks. That's my recollection at least. And if you are having suicidal thoughts or urges to self-harm, anything like that, definitely mention that. I still remember my general shock at the revelation that most people don't have suicidal thoughts on a regular basis & that's supposedly a really serious thing. The other problem with GPs, well they are generalists. They often don't know lots about treating depression, & so depending on the type of doctor they may prescribe you some sort of medication, along with advice such as a minimum of 30 minutes exercise a day (a brisk walk is all you need), & then after a couple of appointments just to confirm you're really depressed they'll probably pass you on to the Community Mental Health team, who are much better equipped to deal with these things. Although that process can be a bit frustrating at first, getting bounced from one person to another until you are with the right person but stick with it. That's something I learnt to my cost.
The apathy from depression was the hardest part though, or at least it was for me. It just takes the joy from almost everything you once loved to do. And when you struggle to find things that give you joy it then becomes a hassle to be motivated to do positive things that could potentially improve your mood. Fortunately there are some anti-depressant medication which can deal with that apathy to some extent, so at least some of the time you'll care enough to wash yourself, take general care of yourself. But part of it has to come from you wanting to find a reason to care about things. And that's hard as fuck. Good luck.
@CaptainCody said:
You know, I can't give you sympathy for any of this. It sounds like you're struggling with your own emotions and that's a battle of your own willpower and one that you certainly don't have much to be upset about. What you have for spending money in a month is more than I have pocketed in the past 6 months while I deal with my very uncertain life thanks to horrible people. Just get over it, man, that's how you win.
So I just did something that you clearly didn't bother doing & actually read the original post. No where does he ask for your sympathy. So fuck off with this bullshit, eh? What a worthless contribution.
@lemonlateralus said:
Im on citalopram for depression, have been for a month. Really glad i took the steps needed. Feel on the level/balanced more often now and no longer down. All the best my fellow bomber.
Just a note of warning but I was advised by my GP that citalopram would take 6-8 weeks before you would expect to notice any actual effects from the medication, so if it is boosting your mood it could well be psychosomatic from just the feeling of doing something about this problem that could have plagued you for years. Which isn't a bad thing, but just a note so you don't get down-hearted if it doesn't work miracles instantly.
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