A Marvelous Alternative to E3: Part Four

Part 04: More Like Short John Silver

Kidnapping my teacher is one thing, but why did you have to make it personal?So yeah, we get back to camp to find out those miniature mutineers have absconded with our comely teacher. This will not stand! Also King Blue is a terrible name for a pirate! That's not a pirate name, it's a Dulux swatch.The nerds from Tent #4 gave us some Walkie Talkies - until now, you couldn't select a character that was off-screen. You still can't with the usual R-button leader change, but you can use the Walkie Talkie as an item and switch that way instead. It's a little inelegant, but I'm glad I'm finally able to coordinate the whole team no matter where they are on the island (though the teamwork puzzles still require them all to be in the same place).It also got darker out. Spooky! It appears that the cloud cover layer from before was subtly color-changed into nocturnal mists.You can see from the crude kidnapping note that the pirates are hiding out behind the "No Entry" sign we passed some time ago. It's here, but it looks like they created an obstacle: that soccer bully from earlier. We can't get rid of his ropes without unlocking that padlock, and the key got thrown into the lake.No visible key means one of these darn fish ate it. I hope I find the right one the first time!I sure did. This could've gone very badly if it was a specific unmarked fish.I wasn't actually all that worried, to be honest. I mean, we've already eaten three of you.The bully basically told us we were chumps and would never survive the dangers to come. I love these redemptive arcs, so uplifting.Right, the whole reason the sign was here was because of this big-ass hole. I've only got the one character that can clear it right now, so I'll be leaving Max and Deon behind.This is a hint. Directly beneath us is the cave with all those items on ledges. The footprints end at an invisible pitfall, which lets us grab this item. Like the keys, it's not so much a boy-specific power-up but just an item we need to complete a puzzle later.This is what I like to see: shortcuts getting opened. Now that we have at least one boy on this side, I can use the Walkie Talkie to direct the others to the opposite side.And that's a bingo. How many of these skull boulders are there? And why don't some of them have nicer shapes carved into them, like a rainbow or something?It's only a little while later that we find another pitfall. This one kinda drags you in, so clearing it is tricky.But hey, I don't mind being rewarded for failure. I did find another use for luck rocks this time: when you use the whistle while your party members are with you, Cluck the Bird from the intro will swoop around the screen for a while. If you activate him with the investigation mode, he'll give you a hint for one stone. Given how many puzzles there are in this game, it seems like an invaluable service. I just hope I don't need these rocks for anything else...I also spotted a friend of mine. Maybe he can help us with this quicksand pit?I... hmm. I don't think he wants to help us out this time.Fortunately, we've got Spring-Heeled Jack here to help us out once again. Being the only platforming-capable hero in a Nintendo game sure does give you a sense of power. Must be why Mario is so feared.Here's where we needed a rope. This allows us to build a bridge to the next part of the level, and the rocks we pushed into the quicksand pit means the entire party can get across.We haven't seen combat yet, but the characters do have health bars. These tomatoes, which are all over the island, are a way to replenish lost health. They respawn, but there are times when they're not easily within reach.Speaking of combat, Deon just got our first weapon. The mitt and ball is a projectile weapon, perhaps obviously enough. Definite shades of EarthBound here.Anyway, the game gives us a gauntlet of sorts with these damn birds. They quickly appear and disappear into the foliage, and can be damaging if they hit you. One well-timed toss of the baseball is enough to knock them off-screen. Presumably this game will have one of those "no animals were harmed" disclaimers at the end.We finally found our way to the monkey, but Winky refuses to let us pass. We can, however, mess with his ears and nose. He doesn't like it.Having enough of the monkey on our back, we hit Winky with the baseball to momentarily point him the wrong way, allowing us interact with the back on our monkey. A zip, huh?Right, it's one of those pocket privateers. I doubt this'll be the last trick they pull, either.Here's another shortcut-blocking boulder that we can now remove. Feels good, man.For this sequence, the pirate at the top activates the fans to force you off the ledge. The only one who can make it to the other side is Deon with his Dash Shoes: this also lets him bean the pirate with the baseball to let the others pass. Where did they find all these giant fans?Oh man, are we going to have to pop some puppers? Say it ain't so! Rorie, forgive me.Turns out there was a very little person near the tree (she wrote the SOS note in the sand you can just about make out above).I guess... we now have a Borrower? All right. As long as she doesn't interrupt every thirty seconds like Navi.She'll only be carried by Max. We learn it's because she prefers the more stout gentlemen. Man. Video games and their tiny girlfriend wish fulfilment bullshit, am I right?Welcome aboard, Polly. This is supremely weird. Does she just sit in his pocket? Because let me tell you, there's not a whole lot of room in a big guy's pocket. You heard me.Is... one of the tiny pirates riding that dog like a horse? What is wrong with these monsters?There are more map signposts scattered around. Can't take any yourself, but at least it keeps you updated. I'm actually almost done with this island - does that mean there are more islands to explore afterwards? (As well as the fact that my item inventories are barely half full, this is currently still "Chapter 1". I don't imagine I'll actually beat this game by the end of E3 at this pace...).We find another one of these robots. This one squirts water, which hydrates those withering looking leafs. It needs to be standing in the right place, facing the right direction though.And it's one of those programming puzzles where you have to input eight commands to send it to the robot. I think this is one of those issues unique to binary. That means you have to figure out how to get the robot into the right position in exactly eight moves, no more no less.The furthest left leaf turns into this sweet bridge, allowing the rest across. Previously, only Jack with his leaping shoes could make the crossing. This has been a recurring theme; Jack's kind of our scout at the moment.Head too far right and you'll reach this field with a bunch of skull boulders. Some have luck rocks beneath, but they seem fairly immaterial.Instead, the puzzle is to get past these pipes. We eventually need to shift this pipe to the left over to that missing section on the right, but the wooden pegs are in the way again. My (Hyrule) kingdom for a big mallet!Deon is the only one small enough to pass through the pipe. I naturally went straight for the red chest like a dummy, and got caught by the pirates. They're smarter than they look. They'd have to be, I suppose.They have this Layton-esque teaser, but I guess it didn't get translated well because the clues didn't line up with the solution. Instead, I just tried various combinations of three to figure out the order of their ages. They were happy enough to give me as many chances as I needed. Of course, they had no intention of freeing me even if I did solve their obnoxious puzzle, but then the real Winky shows up out of nowhere to chase them off. If we need to get saved by monkeys every time....The monkeys carry the cage away, with this little fan dance thing which I have to imagine is a matsuri thing, leaving me to finally grab what's in that chest. Considering I need something to knock those pegs down if I hope to get the rest of the team here, it can only be...Heck yeah! Give this kid all the dangerous weapons. After knocking down the pegs, it's simply a matter of pushing this pipe into place and away from the cave entrance.Gilbert and Sullivan's The Pirates of Pintsize aren't having any of it though, turning this button-mashing mini-game into a big tug of war. Guys, I'm starting to think these pirates might be jerks.Couldn't have said it better myself. (Seriously. I'm running out of ways to combine "small" and "pirates".)So here we are, the entrance to the big dungeon island. It's time to rescue Miss Gina and maybe steal some more treasure? Maybe? I mean, while we're in the area and all...

Dun-dun-dun! Tune in tomorrow for what will almost certainly be a tiny room with the captive teacher and five screenshots' worth of ending cutscenes, just to spite my decision to stop today's update here.

Part One	Part Two	Part Three
Part Four	Part Five	Part Six