When im farming for gold (aka Gold Farming) i will listen to the smooth classical stylings of Midnight Brown and often ponder such things like "Who of the GB Crew, make the best apprentice GoldFarmer?". And im sure you have all thought the same thing.. but obviously not to the professional extent that i have, here are some of my deep meditative thoughts on the subject...

What you need to be a succesfull Gold Farmer like myself..

1. Lots of Free time..
2. Long attention-span
3. Commitment and the DRIVE
4. Impeccable taste in Energy drinks
5. A really sweet beard
6. Be asian.. or atleast (and in my case) have similar traits to that of an Anti-social Loot Ninja..
   

Ryan Davis
Ryan to me seems like he has 3 out of the 6 qualities required to become my apprentice, however he lacks what i like to refer to as "the DRIVE", no this is not some NFSMW euphomism, this is having the courage, the strength and the will to mercillessly beat down on thousands of swamp rats in order to acheive greatness. I also doubt his ability to endure long stretches of nothingness when your waiting to beat down on some noob boss who has yet to spawn. You have to be lightning quick.. like the flash, but without the tight spandex (well its ok i spose if u want to, goes good with a sweet beard) if you want to jump ahead.

And whilst i dont think Ryan is asian, he would definetely look great in a sneaking ninja suit... but i guess that doesnt really apply for gold farming.

Sorry Ryan, but you are not cut out to be a Gold Farmer.

Jeff Gerstmann
After purchasing jeffgerstmann.com i have often thought of the idea of Jeff, being my young padowan goldfarmer apprentice, but would he be any good? well... no, infact i think jeff would be the worst apprentice ever.. lets start from the top. Does Jeff have the time? well i would have to say no.. When was the last points report he did? A LONG TIME AGO.. you cant just Farm Gold every month or so... you need to farm daily.. cause if you dont farm it.. some legitimate player will grind his way to success.. and if that player gets the gold.. he wont want to buy it from me now will he? NO!

Secondly, does jeff have a long attention span? The answer is no. Have you ever watched a Points report video? its jam packed with all sorts of different topics, some times not even remotely close to the idea of Gaining Points!

Thirdly, does jeff have a sweet beard? i dunno reader, what do u think? does a points report have a sweet beard? ...no it doesnt, so there you go. Sadly, Jeff would be not be a good time investment for me.

Brad Shoemaker
I guess that this point you could assume that at some point im going to have to chose atleast 1 of the GB Crew for my possible apprentice and you would be correct, but you guessed too soon. Even tho Brad has the most experience in mmos (althought tbh i dwarf him in experience because i am so pro), you have to look at Brads style, not asian, no beard, HORRIBLE taste in energy drinks - which btw is very bad, i dont know if any of you have noticed, but brad often just wakes up in time for the bombcast, which is why he has such a deep voice all the time.. im pretty sure thats it. I will give something to brad tho, i think he would have a very large attention-span and im sure he has alot of free time, but i dont think he has the commitment... especially after admitting his weakness and quitting wow. BL Brad, you almost became my apprentice. 

Vinny Caravella
So i suppose you think its now a forgone conclusion that Vinny is my choice to become my young apprentice padowan gold farming partner... well yes, he would be, but why you ask? well its quite simple. His attention span is near limitless as far as i can tell, anyone who has the mental stamina to complete any of the dragon ball games gets a golden star in my eyes. Also because he likes dragon ball so much, u could assume that Vinny is infact some decendant of an asian family..despite his euopean family name.

Vinny doesnt QUITE have a really sweet beard, but again, if you include the dragon ball and the THOUSANDS of hours he has put towards clipping gameplay videos and interviews and all that jibber jabber, i think Vinny has the commitment to grow one, also he has been an active MANLY participant in the drink tests during the bombcast. So Vinny in my eyes would be my choice.

Surprise anyone?

bbl farming