Zombies???

I'm relatively new to Ubuntu but I'm a little distraught to see that zombies have invaded my laptop... Can anyone tell me what this means? O_o
 

I'm so sorry.

But you probably won't be alive long enough to read this, so it doesn't matter.

Who could sleep at a time like this!?

Ah that's simple, basically when you close a process it is normally removed from memory, however if a curse, witchcraft, or other dark art or ritual is performed, the process can be brought back into memory, albeit with increased memory usage which may lead to the process performing very slowly, often times the speed of a shambling walk or stagger. You may also notice the program begins craving RAM and biting other programs while exclaiming "RAAAAAMMMMSSSSS...~", any programs attacked by the original program will also become infected so you should take necessary precautions and actions as quickly as possible.
 
It is important that you quarantine the infected computer as soon as possible by removing the ethernet connection, disabling any wireless internet, and removing it from the local network. The only way to kill the infected program is to destroy the process tree, or by dropping a nuclear device onto the computer's kernel, purging all programs but stopping the spread of the infection.

Well, I guess I can only hope to find cover somewhere in my folders.  And hope that it's still only one zombie, not more

@Xeiphyer: Best explanation ever.

probably it's because your thing is sleeping yet still active?

I think we found patient zero.

Those poor, poor processes.