@Mandaray: lol Mandaray, you can get as offended all you want, but fact of the matter is: Your not in the majority, as a matter of fact.... You happen to be the first person I heard about who has happened to survive a "break".
@Killa_Jo: fuck this, me and my girlfriend have great trust. we love eachother no doubt. i dont care if she was hangin around a few guys here and there, but if shes hangin out with dudes more than you, somethings up. number one, dude your dating the chic everyone calls "one of the guys" i've been in this situation before and it sucks. and number 2, if you girl is hangin around other guys more than you, you need to find a better girlfriend, end of story. the idea that you can be girlfriend and boyfriend yet spend more time around others than with eachother doesnt make any sense. its supposed to be the other way around. at least 60% of the time you two should be hangin out tgether (even if you two are out with others) and the other 40% of time you to can be totally seperate and with other friends. sounds to me like its the opposite or worse. thats pretty stupid. everyone else starts wondering why you're never with you gf/bf.
what does this girl look like? if shes spending more time being the "one of the guys" chic and hangin around other dudes more than you, chances are shes not that great looking and/or shes has a duder personality. dont get me wrong though, having a girlfriend who is cool enough to be able to chill with your guy friends and be totally cool and not a pain in the ass is awesome, its the kind of girl i date, but theres a thin line between that and a chic who acts all sweet and cutesy around you and then all broski when her guy friends show up.
if you said she was spending more time with her girl friends this wouldnt be an issue, but come on man, maybe you could do better...
Do your own shit for a while cos' insecurity in a relationship is good news for nobody. Things don't sound so good for you but hey, if worst comes to worst, there are plenty more fish in the sea.
" I took a sociology class in college last Fall so I'm pretty much an expert on relationships. Whoever shows the least amount of interest in the relationship always has the upper hand. You have to keep her honest and humble. Don't put the pussy on a pedestal. Can I say that? "
are you being sarcastic? i hope so. In *real* non-textbook relationships the amount of interest you show is just the opposite with the right girl. A women who loves you wants all of your attention and interest almost all the time and if you go and hang out with other chicks she'd be pissed.the break thing is total bullshit. just like the whole its me not you bullshit. she is either already cheating or at best looking to leave. if she can't be up front about her feelings then whatever, let her go... trust me, you don't want to deal with a girl like that forever. "
In the "real" you are completely wrong. You smother a woman with attention, they get tired of you. You complement a woman every day, the complement not only begins to mean nothing, but it also starts to annoy her. The value of attention means more to a woman when it's more scarce. A woman wants to feel special, but she doesn't want to be annoyed. "
well, i have been married for 10 years. i think i know a thing or two. granted all women are different. but in my working and loving marriage... attention is important. i agree that women want to feel special and not annoyed... i am just saying when a women loves you and wants you around... she wants your attention. if she doesn't than more often than not that leads to an unhealthy relationship. the right women wants you around and wants your attention more often then not (else she is not the right women in all likelyhood, in my experience)
@Erzs: Guess it really is a small world after all! hah. @Mandaray said:
" Go do your own thing for awhile. Hang out with your own friends. Focus on your own life. Don't ignore her or shut her out, but also don't really prioritize her for a little while. See how she responds. You two might really just need a little space, and that's OK. Doesn't mean it's the end of the world. But usually when one or the other person in a relationship is losing interest, it's because you've started taking each other for granted, so the quickest way to get it back is to simply decrease said attention. And, if she decides she likes having her own space and that she doesn't really want to hang out with you anymore, then you know which way the wind is blowing and can make your decision accordingly. "
It's just a coded msg telling you that she's cheating on you with her guy friend and she wants more space to futher cheat on you because she doesn't want to argue, or you didn't trust her if she isn't already cheating.
" My girlfriend recently told me she needs space because ive been fighting with her about her spend more time with her guy friends more than she does me. She also enjoys spending more time with them than me. I still love her but i think she is going to break up with me. Thoughts? Edit: She wont answer my texts/calls until she contacts me somehow at night at some random time "
She's a whore, dude. Any chick that ditches you for her "guy friends" isn't worth your time. Dump the bitch before she hurts you even more by you finding out the "truth" of why she's really meeting with them. A true girlfriend won't be more interested in spending time with her guy friends than with her actual boyfriend.
Went through a similar situation man she broke up with me after a break and we decided to hang out as friends and things progressed very quickly back to us being in a relationship. Just look at what could have caused the break but don't look at it a necessarily a bad thing keep hope. "If she leaves you and comes back she is yours. If she leaves and doesn't she never was."
well thanks men, i know shes not fooling around haha i trust her. I'll just see whats up when she texts/calls me. If she wanst to break up which i dont think she does then whatever her loss. I'm pretty sure she just wants some space which is hard for me but whatever im going to give it to her
" Went through a similar situation man she broke up with me after a break and we decided to hang out as friends and things progressed very quickly back to us being in a relationship. Just look at what could have caused the break but don't look at it a necessarily a bad thing keep hope. "If she leaves you and comes back she is yours. If she leaves and doesn't she never was." "
sorry for double post but i didnt see this. Thanks dude i agree 100% with what you're saying and thats what im going to do. Stop nagging her about hanging out with her guy friends. I trust her and i should show her i trust her.
I would just completely ignore her until she wants a relationship again.
If you remain friends, she might be content being just friends knowing she could see you and a million other guys on a daily basis without having to be concerned with staying true to anyone. Friendship is a powerful tool for women. They can get the nice side of you, and they won't have to do anything intimate for it.
I stopped talking to my ex after she pulled the "Maybe we should take a break" card. It's a nice way of saying "I want to see other guys but I still want you as an option if I can't find someone else" Let her go. Keeping hope alive will only cause you more emotional pain.
The writing's on the wall. You now need to change your mindset into, "If I can't have her, then no one can." So go out and buy some chloroform, rope, and a gag. Trick her into coming over, or if that doesn't work, stalk her for a few days to find out where and when is the best to pounce on her.
Uh oh! The girlfriend opts out of her contract! Dude, so this is like in sports. She wants a break because she wants to know you're committed to her and can raise your game and make things better for her. However, she's interested in seeing what other offers are out there until you can come around and really give her what she wants. At the same time, it's hard to step your game up when she's kind of avoiding you. Since your time with her might be more limited at the moment, perhaps you should try to make that time extra special, and hopefully she'll come around and back into your arms.
Not going to read the thread, but "taking a break" usually means she wants to dump you but doesn't have the stomach or heart to actually end it. Be wary my friend.
@shadows_kill: Yahoo! Answers is a wealthy source of intelligent debate and discussion, and a proper discourse when it comes to seeking relevant, timely and factually correct information, sir. Withdraw your claims!
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