How do you eat a chocolate bar?

With my face!

Instructions:

Break off the row (3 pieces usually)

Turn it sideways

Shine it up real good

and shove it up your candy ass

What, no Seinfeld clip?

If I can, I'll break off a column and eat it regardless of the segmentation or if there are no columns then break off rows. Sometimes the pieces are just too big for a single bite and eat it in two bites.

@stonyman65: Cadbury, Galaxy and Kinder chocolates come to mind.

If I ain't sharing it, what's the point of breaking it into pieces?

Do you eat hot dogs with a fork and knife too ?

Oh wow, I'm surprised by the results. Thought I was one of the few crazy people who took time to break of pieces and then eat them :P

I DESTROY IT WITH MY MAW.

1. Bite around the sides
2. Bite the top off
3. Eat whatever's in the middle
4. Eat the bottom

Why conform to their ridged structure, break the rules!

I always wanted to experiment with taking various chocolate bars, those will multiple chewy layers of different substances, and melting them and mixing them to see how the taste changes. Does a Snickers tastes the same if you melt, mix, and harden it it again...for the sake of argument assume I fish-out the peanuts to crush them into paste, and reincorporate them.

Pieces bitches.

I break them off. I ain't no goddamn savage.

Same here, but on occasion when I bite I do take into account the segmentation.

@hatking: touché! That post made laugh my ass off!

I tend to throw the chocolate in the air, juggle it with my six shooters and then catch the individual pieces with my mouth as they fall back to earth. There is then a massive explosion behind me (I don't turn to look) as heroically grab and kiss the babe.

Pretty much this.

i would use a Irish cream coffee enema....i think it would flow better.

I usually bite where the pre-cut pieces/segments are.

I prefer really dark 75-80% chocolate, which means you just can't eat it all in one go, Thus I tend to break it. Though whether it breaks according to the pattern, doesn't really matter to me. I eat it on top of my breakfast or with or a good cup of coffee.

Honest question here: why do so many people hate Hershey's? Personally, I'm not a huge chocolate fan in general, but it's not like I find it to be unbearable.

And I of course eat by the segments when I do eat them, and the segments definitely stretch to almost all chocolate bars.

I do not remember creating this topic.