2019 Game (That I Played) of the Year

2019 was a year of massive upheaval in my personal life. Thinking back, what I find interesting about the changes that came are how each affected the way that I interact with videogames. Bear with me as I journalize the most important year of my life:

At the beginning of 2019 I was at the tail end of a limited-term employment that I adored, but commuted three hours a day to attend. Lunch breaks seemed long and poor weather could strand me near the workplace, so my trusty Nintendo Switch was never far from my side. But I knew that about halfway through the year, my employment would end and I was free to seek engagement closer to home. Then we got the news that was five years in the making.

I was going to become a father.

Suddenly new employment much closer to home became an imperative. The dark cloud of combined unemployment and parenthood weighed heavily on me, and I responded how I always do: retreating into games with every moment of my waking free time.

I am fortunate that these bouts of oppressive escapism are short-lived, but I delved into the backlog with intensive focus. Eventually, I landed a position that paid modestly but promised family-friendly hours. I suddenly found myself with more free time than I've had in fifteen years, since the day I earned a driver's permit.

Months later, my son was born. My paternity leave stranded me at home with huge stretches of time with nothing but a sleeping baby to account for. The changes in your life are numerous and foundation-shaking but when it came to gaming, they were two-fold: a game must be pause-friendly and I have to play with a controller. Most multiplayer games were suddenly off limits and my PC began to collect dust until suitable controller and living room arrangements were made.

The following are the top ten games I played this year, with no promises that they released in 2019, only that I played them for the first time in 2019. This, I feel, is the only sensible way a civilian like myself can hope to have a year-end list. Additionally, I have included three honorable mentions that were not in contention, but I felt deserved recognition.

List items

• 

  Tetris 99

  HONORABLE MENTION

  My great gaming shame is that prior to Tetris 99, I had never played Tetris. I found myself taken, gleefully slinging blocks in the hopes of surviving. I did okay for weeks, but as a Tetris newcomer I continue to find myself more and more outgunned by others' incredible skill by the passing day. It's a great game, but not for me.

• 

  Apex Legends

  HONORABLE MENTION

  Apex Legends would win the award for "game I played most for one week and then never played again." Why? Despite my best efforts, I could not pry any of my gaming circle from their chosen multiplayer games, whether those be Fortnite or otherwise. I am not in a position to have time or inclination to play multiplayer games without a crew, so Apex will forever sit in the basement of my hard drive, a warm memory in my mind.

• 

  Bloodstained: Ritual of the Night

  HONORABLE MENTION

  I only leave Bloodstained off the heart of my list because I feel I did not have enough time to properly evaluate it. I squeezed in a week or so of Bloodstained between two of my most anticipated releases of the year. I found exploration and combat to be exhilarating and I look forward to a full playthrough early next year.

• 

  Pokémon: Let's Go, Pikachu!/Eevee!

  NUMBER TEN

  A confession: I am the target audience of Pokémon Let's Go. As a youngster I lived and breathed Pokémon through the cards, the television show, and, of course, the games. As I grew into my teenage years, I became more concerned with having "mature" experiences in games and I fell off the Pocket Monsters before the third generation.

  Pokémon Let's Go was a warm breath of nostalgia. The most moving part of the game, for me, was the music. Hearing the beautiful and modern takes on songs that chirped out of my Gameboy twenty years ago nearly brought me to tears. I smiled at seeing the Pokémon throughout the world, including following after my avatar.

  Pokémon games are largely locked in stone, it seems, but the foundation has always been solid. Rock-paper-scissors turned based combat with your favorite murderpet. It has never been made to be difficult or frustrating, and that was to full effect in Let's Go. The game was too easy, the reimagined story boring, and the depth lacking, but my lasting memory of Let's Go will always be a warm smile.

• 

  Ape Out

  NUMBER NINE

  In contrast, Ape Out is a spasm of violence and heart-pounding drums. I found my breath tattooing to the dynamic drum beat as I sprinted from open corridor to corridor, searching for the next target. I cackled as I seized an agent only for him to turn his compadre to mulch with a shotgun. I was enamored with the cardboard cutout-esque design. It's a simple experience, but a memorable one.

  There's perhaps too little variety and the performance was iffy for me at times, but there are days when I grab my Switch seeking an experience to liven me up. There are few better, with the carefully orchestrated march of death set to the ever pounding drums. It's an acidic yet lively energy and a game I return to every once and again.

• 

  Untitled Goose Game

  NUMBER EIGHT

  The much-ballyhooed indie darling finally released, and I found it to be an altogether delightful experience. You become the ultimate agent of avian chaos as you steal, frighten and confuse the poor village folk on your way to your ultimate objective. The game is split into scenes with multiple objectives each, reminiscent of the recent Hitman games. Pull (or honk) the right lever and the clockwork world reacts in a particular way.

  Some of these objectives are confusing and the game is quite short, but the art is striking and the piano soundtrack is fitting and mellow.

• 

  Sea of Thieves

  NUMBER SEVEN

  A controversial addition to the list, but Sea of Thieves feels like the Last Hurrah of multiplayer games for me for some time. I do not know what the game was like on launch, but in January there was a handful of different things to do and see.

  It's a uniquely cooperative experience that lends itself to creating stories, like the time we were sunk by a kraken but I got out in a rowboat with all our loot, or the time a rival ship chased us for over an hour, finally catching us only after we'd finished dumping all the treasure out in our wake.

  All games are more fun with your friends, but some games are better at eliciting that sidesplitting chaos than others, and Sea of Thieves is among the best. I would not recommend to those playing along, but for me, Sea of Thieves was one of the best experiences I had all year, and I will never forget the beauty and terror of staring out at that wonderful water.

• 

  Doom

  NUMBER SIX

  I briefly tried DOOM a few years back but I bounced off hard. Hearing all the excitement for DOOM Eternal forced me to give it another try, and I'm glad I did. The problems I had still existed, but I was able to find the joy in sprinting around ripping demon limbs from demon torsos.

  There's not much to say in support of DOOM beyond the fact that it is pure combat. Flying across the arena blowing away foe after foe while intense metal pounds in the background does not grow old quickly. The weapons are fun and varied, and any game with a good shotgun gets a bump from me. More surprising was the hints at worldbuilding and lore which added just the right amount of intrigue to the hellish encounters.

  All that said, I had major issues with level design in places as I felt the game does not signpost your goal well. It also has some of the worst forced platforming I have had the misfortune of enduring. And finally, the visual design is muddy in the worst of ways. All that aside, the pure adrenaline of DOOM makes it a remarkable game.

• 

  Slay the Spire

  NUMBER FIVE

  My ears perked when I first heard about Slay the Spire. I have a huge weakness for roguelite games and an even bigger weakness for card games, so the concept of a roguelite deckbuilder was salivating for me.

  Slay the Spire is deep, difficult, and keeps surprising me with every new run I make. It's packed with difficult choices at every fork in the road, but the like best roguelites, if you can break it, they let you break it.

  I could not put this game down for weeks after I started. It crept into my every free thought and camped out. On my long commutes, I found myself glancing wistfully at my Switch case as I felt an near-irresistible pull to play it (not that I ever did while driving, mind you). I was hooked in the way that great roguelites do.

• 

  Bloodborne

  NUMBER FOUR

  I spent most of the 2010s immune to the Fromsoft Souls game craze. All I saw was a dry, nonsensical grim fantasy game with slow combat and no plot. There was no discernible draw. It wasn't until the release of 2019's Sekiro: Shadows Die Twice that I found myself drawn to the series. I played Dark Souls and enjoyed it, but Bloodborne was the game that I loved.

  The world is detailed and impressive. The character models are detailed and grisly. I fell in love with the aggressive, blitzing play style. I couldn't stop myself from killing each and every boss until I earned the platinum trophy.

  To me, each new boss encounter was a puzzle to be solved. I'd enter the arena and play passively, observing each move until I detected what seemed like a weakness. Then I'd wade in. I struggled most of all with Bloodstarved Beast, a hulking candid-like monster with a poison mechanic. It took me twelve or so tries but when I finally slaughtered him, I felt as though I'd just climbed a mountain. Each boss battle felt like a careful dance above a precipice. One step too far, one commitment too hasty, and I'd fail and have to start again. And it was exhilarating.

• 

  Monster Hunter: World

  NUMBER THREE

  I grew up with Nintendo home consoles and a gaming PC. I never had the pleasure of owning a Playstation until late in the PS3 lifespan. I saw the birth of the Monster Hunter series from afar and was long curious. I finally got the chance to play it with Monster Hunter: World. It's a curious game, packed to the gills with strange systems that work against the game, like gobs of crafting and collecting that serve more to slow down the joy of hunting than accentuate it. Yet, the core gameplay is so technical and so addictive that I couldn't stop myself from playing more. I played the entirety of the "story" of Monster Hunter: World in about ten days.

  Each monster is larger and more intimidating than the last, but if you play smart you can down these behemoths. My personal nemesis was a nasty brute named Teostra. There were a few attacks that I just couldn't figure out. But each failure taught me something new until at last I succeeded and moved on. I keep telling myself I will return to Monster Hunter: World, but I tried and it is not an easy game to return to.

• 

  Death Stranding

  NUMBER TWO

  Number Two on a personal top-ten game of the year list is a prestigious position, but I can't help but feel a little bitter about where Death Stranding lands on my list. I am a longtime Metal Gear fanboi with a hopeless penchant for the weird and the cheesy. Death Stranding was my most anticipated game of the year with a bullet. In the end, Death Stranding succeeded in massively subverting my expectations.

  I was tentative in my excitement for the gameplay, but the seemingly dull task of trucking literal tons of boxes across post-post-apocalyptic "America" was an incredibly refreshing experience. I savored every minute of it, especially when my jobs took me up into the mountains and I crafted an extensive zip line network so I could cross miles in seconds. It's a deeply rewarding experience to "chain" deliveries from station to station while your numbers climb every higher.

  I expected to love the story, especially coming on the heels of Metal Gear. The combination of supernatural horror with sociological study seemed tantalizing. However, despite the beautiful graphics and sound and decent-to-excellent performances of the main cast, it all is wasted. The story manages to avoid nearly every interesting aspect of the setting and it concludes with a tepid message about connection. Where it could have been deeply moving, it was shallow and dull.

  I will definitely play Death Stranding again, because out of all the games I played this year it had some of my favorite gameplay of all. But I'll never take in the narrative again, because it's not worth it. And that's a real shame.

• 

  Sekiro: Shadows Die Twice

  2019 GAME OF THE YEAR

  Everything I said about Bloodborne applies to Sekiro, but with twice the intensity. The combat is deep and precise to an incredible degree. Each stroke of the sword matters. Each maneuver matters. The key difference between Bloodborne and Sekiro is this: in Bloodborne, you fight to endure the monster. In Sekiro, you ARE the monster. I developed such a sharp understanding of my own and my enemies capabilities that I began to execute attack patterns to elicit a desired response from my foe so I could counter the response to my advantage. I mastered each boss to a degree that a second playthrough took me two hours to defeat the entire game again.

  There is *nothing* as exciting in gaming as mastering a Sekiro boss to the point that you utterly shit on them in thirty seconds. I will remember the way Sekiro made me feel for years. But Bloodborne was exciting too, albeit to a lesser degree. What elevated Sekiro far above its predecessor was a new commitment to telling a coherent narrative and having characters that I, as the player, could care about. The game has a handful of unforgettable characters and I find myself still watching the cutscenes and reading the dialogue on my FOURTH playthrough.

  Sekiro is such an excellent game that it belongs in a discussion of the Best Games of All-Time. It isn't just my best game of 2019, but *easily* my best game of 2019.