Left 4 Dead (360) Review

Continuing in my newborn tradition of reviewing games that have been reviewed a thousand times, my next entry is on Valve’s zombie thriller, “Left 4 Dead”. The concept, as we all know, is simple: throw a handful of horror movie stereotypes into equally stereotypical settings and watch the fur (and blood, and guts) fly as up to four buddies take on the zombie horde.

Unfortunately, the simplicity of the concept is both its blessing and its curse. Though the characters and settings of the game certainly are colorful, that’s about all they are; that is to say, they lack substance. The only story that the player can gleam comes from etchings on the walls of the safe houses. Some consider this to be a strength, but I’ve found that after playing the game at length, the lack of information gets a little stale. The characters have the same problem. Though they are all charismatic in their own way, from Francis’s rough ‘n’ tough ‘tude to the relatable everyman Louis, that’s about all they have going for them. After the initial thrill of slaying hordes of zombies with buddies by my side wore off, I found myself wanting more from Valve’s shooter.

Let’s face it: Left 4 Dead might as well be multiplayer only, because that’s really the only way to play this game. Though playing solo in the dark can sometimes heighten the tension (and annoying pseudo-gangsters on XBOX Live lessen it), you’re really not getting the full experience. The best way to play this zombie-slayer is with three buddies over XBOX Live. The game relies heavily on camaraderie and is thus best enjoyed while listening to your friends’ desperate cries for help as zombies pummel, bite and claw them to bloody ribbons. Speaking of zombies, we’re not only dealing with the standard brain-starved variety here: there are the four “Special Infected” that will frequently spawn and take a shot at your gray matter. The first of these is the Hunter, a hoodie clad menace that growls when it’s far away, screams when it’s close and finally pounces you when it’s just too late. Once the Hunter sinks its claws into you, the only thing that can save you is a compassionate teammate, whether by shooting or shoving it off.

The same goes for the next Special Infected, the Smoker. Perpetually followed by a dense cloud of gray-green smoke, the Smoker takes out survivors by lashing out at them from a distance with its tongue and then pulling them in for the kill. This is definitely (in this reviewer’s opinion) the most dangerous of the special infected, especially in the wooded areas, since once you are pulled into those trees, it’s extremely difficult for teammates to reach you in time (especially on higher difficulties).

Next is the Witch, a zombie with the scariest case of PMS you’ve seen in your life. The first time you encounter a Witch, she’s curled into a ball on the floor, weeping for her lost loved ones or her extinguished life or whatever. However, don’t even begin to imagine that this somehow makes her a pushover, ‘cause as the 360 achievement notes, the Witch might as well have a big old sign over her head that says “Do Not Disturb”. If you are unfortunate enough to catch the Witch in a beam of your flashlight or, worse yet, bump into her, prepare for a beating. The zombie-ess jumps up, screams bloody murder and lays into you with eight-inch talons. Although she isn’t particularly hearty (a couple of well-placed shots from yourself and your teammates will usually take her down), it’s her ridiculous damage per second that makes her a threat. Often incapacitating you with a single strike, the Witch will then proceed to flay you to death with aforementioned talons. As previously stated, its best to try and sneak around this one entirely.

Last is the biggest and baddiest of baddies in Left 4 Dead: the Tank. This hulking behemoth makes all the other rotters look like complete pushovers. Spawning once or twice per level (and usually twice on finales), the Tank is an incredible threat to you and your team, and when he spawns on Expert, most teams kiss their collective ass goodbye, because it seems like he just won’t go down. The tank likes to turn your body into mush with his obscenely large fists, tear slabs of concrete straight out of the ground and try and catch your dome with them and occasionally hurl cars your way. No matter what he’s doing, the Tank is a clear and present danger for as long as you can hear his labored breathing. The smartest thing to do when dealing with the Tank (especially on the higher difficulties) is to have one of your squad hold onto a Molotov until he spawns, then chuck it at him and run. Eventually even this motherfucker burns. Until then everyone should make a mad dash in the direction of the safe room, as it is a known variable; those who run forward risk encountering Hunters, Smokers, Boomers, regular ol’ zombies or, worse yet, the Witch. Once the giant mass of mutated muscle goes down, regroup quickly, as special infected are on their way to make your lives just that much worse, and anyone left on their own for too long could indeed be left for dead (see what I did there?).

Versus

In this mode, eight players collide in a violent human on zombie orgy. Four players take up the mantle of the survivors, whilst the other four repeatedly spawn as special infected. The goal of the first four is to make it to the safe room without incurring any casualties along the way. The goal of the second group is then obviously to ensure that that doesn’t happen. As we here at Giant Bomb have seen, this mode is best played with a large group of friends (or at least acquaintances) in party chat, as the possible smack talk generated from both groups never fails to be entertaining.

I give Left 4 Dead’s single-player (such as it is) a 2.5 out of 5 as there just isn’t enough content or storyline to keep the offline gamer entertained for long. However, this was never how it was meant to be played, as I’ve said many times before. Its multiplayer earns a healthy 4 out of 5 and is definitely how this holiday season’s horror blockbuster should be enjoyed. This has been my review of Valve’s zombie slayer, Left 4 Dead. Thanks for reading.

- End Boss.