I could have called this blog "Why Red Dead Redemption is awesome: a retrospective." But consider that idea trashed. I could also talk endlessly about how much nostalgia I get from the first level theme from Gun.Smoke. But that's ridiculous. I do, however, want to ramble on about why I loath the west. Or, well, not specifically the cardinal direction but rather the time and place in American history that have been turned into movies, books, toys and.. fashion? Not to mention video games. Somehow though, the appeal of westerns have always eluded me. I never liked the brown dust colored setting, everyone looked dirty and on top of it all, it seemed everyone was overdressing in that desert heat. It's as if I get sweaty just watching them standing around in their cowboy outfits grinning in the sun. They probably had more ass strain than your average nerd too considering how much horse riding was involved. Or made to believed to have been involved. And then there was shooting with less than ideal firearms. Did I mention it always seem to take place in the desert or something like it? Did no one like water back then? I mean, even a little?

My father was a big fan of western movies though, though in retrospect, I am not sure if he was a fan of westerns or just Clint Eastwood in general. But he grew up when America was beginning to spread it's wings culturally around the globe. American cars were exotic and people collected cards with their favorite actors. That's not even getting into the fact that we have a subculture of greasers here that have survived since the 50s and are still active. And from what I just read, apparently there are more restored vintage 50s cars in Sweden than in the US. Which is pretty crazy considering the size difference. But perhaps I grew up in the generation that was no longer impressed by the passing of the US icons. I didn't find Clint Eastwood or cowboys interesting the way my dad did, and I know he played cowboys and indians when he was younger. And probably read some western themed books. But I grew up in a different world.

When I grew up, Sweden was in the middle of an identity crisis and some would argue we still are. We were bombarded with not only American television but also a new wave of immigration from cultures that were not as similar to our own than those previous (such as Germany and Finland). Suddenly, we had people from the Balkans here and they had a different way about them. At least, that's how it felt. I never related to them, nor they to me. Yet when I think about it, maybe I should relate more to Cowboys and Indians, a cultural gap between two sets of people.

But getting back on track, my issue with the western theme was never the cultural gap between two distinct groups of people (and why did no one play cowboys and chinese? or vikings against indians, that happened too) , but the overall sense of dread regarding existence in general. But more so than that, there was an intangible feeling whenever I saw a western that just creeped me out. Even old fun movies like My Name Is Nobody felt like that. Dirty miserable people somehow liking it. I didn't get it.

Recently though, something changed. Maybe the John Wayne cowboy finally died in the same way 80s action heroes no longer exists. Games such as Red Dead Redemption and movies such as The Assassination of Jessie James by the Coward Henry Ford and True Grit brought about something else. An introspective sense of purpose. They were not just dirty, they felt something and had opinions and feelings. I know, I'm totally butchering old western classics by indirectly implying they never had that, but I am not saying that. Because I never could get myself to watch enough westerns to find out, at least when I began consuming movies and games to know fully, but at a glance, I never got that impression.

So naturally, buying Red Dead Redemption when that came out was.. odd. And when I was playing it, I realized that what I had disliked about Western was superficial at best. But I used to be like that, I never watched M*A*S*H either because I hated the art direction of that show, or maybe it just looked "old" to my then young eyes. Whatever the case was, Red Dead Redemption had when I finished it, single handedly explained the appeal of the west. But more than the overall game, which was beautiful in many ways, it was the character of John Marston that really sealed the deal for me. The journey he goes through and the aspects of his persona that is shown throughout the game.

This blog is all over the place, trying to figure out what it is with western games or movies that don't generally sit right with me, but what I have come to realize is that given the right material, I think anything can rise above cultural differences and narrow viewpoints of how dirty a pair of jeans can be before it's time to change. But I digress. Maybe I just revisit the theme park here in Sweden called "High Chaparall", it's a western themed park that I haven't been to since I was a kid. Maybe I'm out of touch with the inner cowboy.

But come on, Gun.Smoke has some pretty awesome music, right?

PS. If you're a western aficionado and something in this blog offends your sensibilities, deal with it, I'm an amateur and your shoes are not tied properly.

I would like to add..

Should nothing of this make sense, either you're too stupid or I'm too tired and too buzzed from way too much caffeine and sugar. But probably not the latter, because I have a cup that says "It's hard to be humble when you're always right."

Also, anyone else feeling a bit pudgy? I think I've had too much food as of late. It makes it hard to justify eating unhealthy candy and snacks and copious amounts of energy drinks. I should cut down on food. Probably a wise decision. I'm already cutting back on water, so this should be amazing.